Guy i met online...disaster

[chace1617]

after very difficult times i had because of my ex boyfriend who was the love of my life but dumped me for another guy, returned said he was sorry, used me for sex and then dumped again and returned to his boyfriend my heart was totally broken...i decided i should try meeting new guys and i thought it would help me forget him...

i created a romeo profile on planetromeo and i started chatting with people. to tell you the truth i was dissappointed by how many weird guys are in there...most of them rude or pushy or ugly or whatever... there was one i thought was ok and started talking with him on skype.
he was not ''the perfect guy'' like i thought about my ex but i loved chatting with him and we had fun doing it. he wasn't very good looking either but i didn't care, i had no hope finding someone better on this site. we started talking on the phone too and he had the nicest voice we did this for a week and i decided i wanted to meet him face to face.

it was the first time i was doing that and i was sooo nervous and scared, i asked my best friend to come with me at my date, not with us but in a distance i would feel safe, thank god he did it. i met him, at first i realised he was shorter than what he had said...we started talking and walking in the city, he was talkative and it was ok, i was feeling kinda weird cause it was the first time i was meeting a guy online and then in real life...we talked but i realised he would hide everything about himself...we were already friend on facebook but had no photos of his face in it, no last name nothing...his name on facebook was john but hi s name on skype was david and i was like wtf? he said he was studying law etc, he wouldn't talk about his brothers/sisters nor his parents when i told him everything about me and my family and i did not hide anything...this was pretty annoying to me but i didnt say anything..after an hour we walked he said we should go to his house, he made me a tea and then kissed me...when he kissed me i liked it so we started making out and then did so many more things and i had a great time.he also wanted to fuck me but i didn;t feel very comfortable on the first date.he kept insisting and i felt even more uncomfortable, i told him we should do it the next me...it was very weird to me i mean i wasn't sure wh oexactly he was i didn't even know his last name i didn't find it very wise to let him fuck me...

after all we had a great time and when i left he told me i should call him the next date.he was not the guy of my dreams by no means but i had fun and i wanted to see him again.what gave me second thoughts was that he hid everything about his personal life the weird facebook profile the different name on skype no details about family etc...
anyway i went on his profile on facebook the next date cause i wanted to send him a message, i realised that on his profile the ''studies'' section was about ''veterinary studies'' which means he would become a vet not a lawyer... i had ansolutely no problem with that but what really pissed me off was his lies. i mean why would you lie to me since i am honest with you? we met face to face you took me to your house but kept on lying to me? whats the point?

i called him and he said i was wrong and all of this is bullshit and it was a mistake on his profile etc and that he wanted to see me again...

after a few hours he called back and said that he didnt want to see me again i was not what he was looking for...

it was not devastating to me but still it made me sad, anyway i told him it was fine and i had no problem with that..

after a few hours he messaged me on facebook and sweared at me ''you're a bad queen a faggot i knew i shouldn't do anything with you'' etc, i was like ....wtf?

i did not reply...i called him a few days later and he insisted i was wrong and that i'm stupid..i was like anyway...wanna fuck?he said ok...after a while he called to cancel it he said he doesn't like he doesn't wanna have sex with me...

after what happened with my ex and then this guy i have lost any hope...i am pretty sure i will always be alone...
what is your opinion about that?

 

[LuckysRevenge]

You sound very desperate. Your ex was NOT the love of your life, he was a scumbag. You deserve better, go out to a gay club, online dating sites and apps are horrible.

I say all this to help, I understand completely how you feel. Best wishes.

A gay club for what? As if those are much better.

 

[LuckysRevenge]

To the OP, relax. You're done after two guys? A little over dramatic. Use friends, family and possibly therapy to work on yourself and being happy.

When your ready to date there are many ways to go about it but you will meet jerks every where. It's up to you to have self worth enough to choose the right people.

 

[Rolyo85]

The apps are perfectly legitimate means of meetimg guys. One just needs a skill set to be successful with them, same as with real life meetings.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

Well it's not like we have tons of options to meet other gay guys. At least at a club he'd be able to see the person in person and get a feel for how they are.

Plus that they have to behave at least so well for them not to be thrown out of the club straight away, which is something that can't be said for the internet.

 

[Disturbance]

Give yourself time.
I think you're still not over your ex (correct me if I'm wrong) yet.

Also, use other websites for dating. IF you are American, go and take a look at OkCupid. In Europe it kinda fails to impress, but in America it is quite awesome.

 

[chace1617]

Give yourself time.
I think you're still not over your ex (correct me if I'm wrong) yet.

Also, use other websites for dating. IF you are American, go and take a look at OkCupid. In Europe it kinda fails to impress, but in America it is quite awesome.

You're right I am not over him yet...maybe it's the fact that he was my first and it was the first guy that made me feel this way ever.when I met him I thought "this was it" he was the one, I felt so sure so safe so happy it just felt right with him. To tell you the truth I am not sure I want to be with someone else... He is the one I want in my life... But it can't happen he's with someone else so I have to move on

 

[Disturbance]

You're right I am not over him yet...maybe it's the fact that he was my first and it was the first guy that made me feel this way ever.when I met him I thought "this was it" he was the one, I felt so sure so safe so happy it just felt right with him. To tell you the truth I am not sure I want to be with someone else... He is the one I want in my life... But it can't happen he's with someone else so I have to move on

I understand you may be afraid that you'll never love another, but the very first time people may fall in love with the idea of love and not the other person himself. I'm sure it hurts a lot and you miss him, but after my first relationship, I needed 3 years to start dating without comparing all the guys to my ex.

You have to grieve, and come to terms with your loss.
I'm sorry. I hope you will soon get better. Until then, take your time and choose a fun hobby, something you can be passionate about. It helps a lot. Also, getting to know a lot of new people can hasten the process.

 

[chace1617]

I understand you may be afraid that you'll never love another, but the very first time people may fall in love with the idea of love and not the other person himself. I'm sure it hurts a lot and you miss him, but after my first relationship, I needed 3 years to start dating without comparing all the guys to my ex.

You have to grieve, and come to terms with your loss.
I'm sorry. I hope you will soon get better. Until then, take your time and choose a fun hobby, something you can be passionate about. It helps a lot. Also, getting to know a lot of new people can hasten the process.

thank you very much for your advice, i really appreciate it

 

[Disturbance]

thank you very much for your advice, i really appreciate it

You're welcome.