Connected on craiglist. I'm married and curious. We were both mid 30's, he sucked me off (with a condom) and I jacked him off. My first time touching another guy's cock and balls and I made him cum. Good experience, but feel somewhat ashamed....any other married guys in similar situations? Thoughts?
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Had first JO session with another guy
- Thread starter heat10
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Halifaxboy8
Porn Star
You feel ashamed because you feel you violated your marriage? Or, do you feel ashamed because you had did something with another guy? Or both?
I know a LOT of married guys that have kids, love their wives, etc, etc, who also realise there's a large part of them that likes to have physical contact with a man once in a while. They'd never leave their marital situation, but at the same time it gets to a point in their life where the curiosity becomes a need. Its where the part of them (and it comes down to finally recognizing that it IS a part of them) that has been put off to the side for so long comes for the forefront.
The first time is a shocker. You have a ton of thoughts warring with each other. Marriage vs your Inner You. The guys that I know that have decided to maintain their marriage tend to do one of two things: keep finding a series of anonymous people over the years, or they have one or two guys they can trust (usually in a similar situation) that they see whenever schedules allow. Both have pros and cons.
Anonymous lovers keep you firmly in the closet with no one really knowing anything. You get to meet up, have fun, and leave. No commitments, no phone calls, no one knowing where you live, etc. But, they ARE strangers and you never know who you are meeting. STD's are an issue here as well, but you seem to be aware of that and are using protection.
Finding a lover or two can take time, but it can be both safer (you know them, he's not going to tell, he's STD free) and potentially more stressful (emotional involvement, unless carefully managed in front of your spouse, can bring up questions).
Just a couple thoughts anyway. Don't be afraid to talk it out on these forums
steve621
JUB Addict
You feel ashamed because you feel you violated your marriage? Or, do you feel ashamed because you had did something with another guy? Or both?
I know a LOT of married guys that have kids, love their wives, etc, etc, who also realise there's a large part of them that likes to have physical contact with a man once in a while. They'd never leave their marital situation, but at the same time it gets to a point in their life where the curiosity becomes a need. Its where the part of them (and it comes down to finally recognizing that it IS a part of them) that has been put off to the side for so long comes for the forefront.
The first time is a shocker. You have a ton of thoughts warring with each other. Marriage vs your Inner You. The guys that I know that have decided to maintain their marriage tend to do one of two things: keep finding a series of anonymous people over the years, or they have one or two guys they can trust (usually in a similar situation) that they see whenever schedules allow. Both have pros and cons.
Anonymous lovers keep you firmly in the closet with no one really knowing anything. You get to meet up, have fun, and leave. No commitments, no phone calls, no one knowing where you live, etc. But, they ARE strangers and you never know who you are meeting. STD's are an issue here as well, but you seem to be aware of that and are using protection.
Finding a lover or two can take time, but it can be both safer (you know them, he's not going to tell, he's STD free) and potentially more stressful (emotional involvement, unless carefully managed in front of your spouse, can bring up questions).
Just a couple thoughts anyway. Don't be afraid to talk it out on these forums
what great insight - i fall in the category of a couple of friends to fool around with - time does not allow for frequent visits - and always fantasizing about being with different guys - thank goodness for the internet
I am almost in that position. I am married and would never leave my wife. I am very happy in my marriage. Ever since I can remember I have enjoyed watching gay porn. I am now in my 30's and the fantasy of being with a man to kiss, jo and blow is becoming more and more prominent in my mind. I have lurked on craiglist but never emailed anyone and don't know if I ever will. I really don't want to just email someone play with them and leave. I want to know the other guy a little bit first and hopefully be in a friends with benifits situation. The only problem is that I am affraid of what that will do to my marriage. Anyways, at least I have this website to get by with for now.
i don't think the sucker would enjoy a plastic taste in his mouth.
ashamed? Nah .... you will get use to it after afew times.
steve621
JUB Addict
i know exactly what u mean, i spent a lot of time on the internet until i met a few guys that i clicked with and spent time chatting with - even though it doesnt' happen often - enjoy the time together with another guy - i know i'm rationaliziing but i figure i'm enjoying some male bonding time -
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Hey -- at least you're ahead of me -- took me 42 years to get around to it (yes, CL here too). Bottom line...you did it, you liked it, you'll probably do it again! Personally, I think it's better to accept it so you can be rational, pick your partners, and keep it safe & sane.
I finally feel happy and well adjusted now that I take the time to find a like minded guy and meet occasionally -- they are out there. And don't listen to anyone who tells you you need to come clean with your wife -- they aren't in your situation (and there tends to be a LOT of that advice on this board).
My only "advice"...take your time...make CLers e-mail you, tell you about themselves, meet in a public place first time with no chance of sex; make 'em work for it! I found a very worthwhile guy that way...only reason I'm looking now is he's moving.
Enjoy your life....
Life's a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!
Auntie Mame
I finally feel happy and well adjusted now that I take the time to find a like minded guy and meet occasionally -- they are out there. And don't listen to anyone who tells you you need to come clean with your wife -- they aren't in your situation (and there tends to be a LOT of that advice on this board).
My only "advice"...take your time...make CLers e-mail you, tell you about themselves, meet in a public place first time with no chance of sex; make 'em work for it! I found a very worthwhile guy that way...only reason I'm looking now is he's moving.
Enjoy your life....
Life's a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!
Auntie Mame
drinksinme
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Ugh man, 28 m str8 / bicurious cleveland here. Where do I sign up for these run ins? Shameless plug for a nice / drinking time. damn.
TylerDurden222
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I'm in the same boat. always been bicurious, but dont feel comfortable meeting randoms online, just too risky. I love watching men play with toys, but dont really enjoy watching two guys fuck (well, sometimes I do...). watching guys kiss still weirds me out, but walking through the men's locker room sends goose bumps down my spine. I love checking out naked men, love seeing them jerk off and use anal toys, and would love to join them...needless to say I'm confused...
how does one meet professional men with these same curiousities, without going to craigslist or adult bookstores?
steve621
JUB Addict
the guys i've met - i've met in chat rooms - we chatted regularly then we decided to meet