Have you ever tried to kill(hurt) yourself?

[ozguy]

Good heavens no! *skedaddles out of thread quick sticks!*

 

[BrandonSBCA]

No I have not, hopefully you're not planning to do that.

 

[Croynan]

I raise a question here just for the purposes of giving one a chance to think about the subject matter?

Is this a question one really wants to ask on an open forum, when you are new to the forum and do not know which of the members here might be effected by the question you have now posed? For some reason the phrase COMMON SENSE comes to my mind.

One hopes that the question asked does not in any way refer and or reflect upon the person who has asked this question, for if so this is a serious matter and not one to be taken lightly.

I do not mean to be offensive and or rude but i am questioning the posting of the said question now before us. croynan

​

eM.

​

 

[twardmo]

I think this speaks for itself.

 

[ladygrey]

If you do need to talk, there are a bunch of us who can listen.

Just pm, sweetie.

As for hurting and killing myself, there was a time when I thought about it. For many years, I lived in self hatred and suffereing. I didn't want to kill myself or feel pain, but I didn't want to keep living. I just assumed there was no other option. Plus, the hurting myself allowed me to feel.....something. It was proof I was still alive and it released pain.

But it was very damaging to my body and spirit. Eventually, I learned to how to deal with the feelings, then I confronted them, and now I'm learning how to forgive and release them.

It's a long road and its very lonely at times. But it's worth it.

Whoever you are, know that you can be loved and will be loved. Know that you can surive anything. And know that there is hope. I'm living proof.

I've been abused, raped, called some very nasty words, rejected, thrown out, and misplaced.

But I've never stopped hoping. And it pays off.

I'm now going to quote (loosely) several things I find inspiring:

From Latter Days, the movie: "The human heart is capable of great heartbreak. But it goes on and still finds a way to heal"

For J.R Tolkien, spoken by Gandlaf: "The shadow will pass."

and I believe that no matter what, so you can grow and heal.

I don't know more about the problem, perhaps you can explain?

but know that love is out there, waitnign for you to let it in.

 

[The_Reaper]

Although this is indeed a very serious thread, I can't help but lighten the mood with a little humour.

I've never tried to kill myself, unless you include constantly eating bad things as ways of trying to kill yourself, for many different reasons.

Although I certainly have had issue to contimplate such action, there have been many things that have held me back from it.

First and foremost, is my parents.

I love my father deeply, and I know it would be a major loss to him as well, but I think it would be the end of my mother.

She'd simply stop.

Not wanting to be responsible for that, I've avoided taking such action.

Secondly, is my profound sense of destiny.

Although it may sound strange, I can't help but shake this feeling that I'm meant for something. That I am here, in present form and all, for a reason. That there's something about myself, be it a flaw or not, that makes me uniquely special and needed in this world.

Rather that is true, or just the crazed deluisons of grandieur, remains to be seen.

And lastly, for all my faults: I like myself too much to pull the plug.

I have my faults, and my flaws, some of which could be fixed by lifestyle changes and some of which I will forever be stuck with.

However, they're as much a part of me as the parts I really like. So, why destroy the parts I like, just to get rid of a few bad ones?

I think we've all thought about it once or twice, and the way it would work best for us...

But those thoughts are generally, quite weak when compaired to the other thoughts the human mind is capable of.

 

[twardmo]

Did you do that to yourself? Is that your arm?

Ya, when i was a junior in hight school. I was pretty misserable.

 

[Absolut]

Although this is indeed a very serious thread, I can't help but lighten the mood with a little humour.

I've never tried to kill myself, unless you include constantly eating bad things as ways of trying to kill yourself, for many different reasons.

Although I certainly have had issue to contimplate such action, there have been many things that have held me back from it.

First and foremost, is my parents.

I love my father deeply, and I know it would be a major loss to him as well, but I think it would be the end of my mother.

She'd simply stop.

Not wanting to be responsible for that, I've avoided taking such action.

Secondly, is my profound sense of destiny.

Although it may sound strange, I can't help but shake this feeling that I'm meant for something. That I am here, in present form and all, for a reason. That there's something about myself, be it a flaw or not, that makes me uniquely special and needed in this world.

Rather that is true, or just the crazed deluisons of grandieur, remains to be seen.

And lastly, for all my faults: I like myself too much to pull the plug.

I have my faults, and my flaws, some of which could be fixed by lifestyle changes and some of which I will forever be stuck with.

However, they're as much a part of me as the parts I really like. So, why destroy the parts I like, just to get rid of a few bad ones?

I think we've all thought about it once or twice, and the way it would work best for us...

But those thoughts are generally, quite weak when compaired to the other thoughts the human mind is capable of.

What a fantastic post. Seriously Reaper, were you just in my head? Or are we separated at birth? Because I have some of those exact thoughts before.

And MattieMich, if you need to talk about anything, please do so. And if you are considering doing something harmful to yourself, please don't! We are all here for you.

 

[Croynan]

Although this is indeed a very serious thread, I can't help but lighten the mood with a little humour.

I've never tried to kill myself, unless you include constantly eating bad things as ways of trying to kill yourself, for many different reasons.

Although I certainly have had issue to contimplate such action, there have been many things that have held me back from it.

First and foremost, is my parents.

I love my father deeply, and I know it would be a major loss to him as well, but I think it would be the end of my mother.

She'd simply stop.

Not wanting to be responsible for that, I've avoided taking such action.

Secondly, is my profound sense of destiny.

Although it may sound strange, I can't help but shake this feeling that I'm meant for something. That I am here, in present form and all, for a reason. That there's something about myself, be it a flaw or not, that makes me uniquely special and needed in this world.

Rather that is true, or just the crazed deluisons of grandieur, remains to be seen.

And lastly, for all my faults: I like myself too much to pull the plug.

I have my faults, and my flaws, some of which could be fixed by lifestyle changes and some of which I will forever be stuck with.

However, they're as much a part of me as the parts I really like. So, why destroy the parts I like, just to get rid of a few bad ones?

I think we've all thought about it once or twice, and the way it would work best for us...

But those thoughts are generally, quite weak when compaired to the other thoughts the human mind is capable of.

What A Superb, Intelligent and Thoughtful Posting From Such a Fine Individual -

​

eM.

 

[ladygrey]

^
Agreed.

 

[Sausy]

I agree with Ladygrey and Croynan,a very sensible and mature posting! Very nicely done,Reaper...and very life-affirming.

 

[twardmo]

Awww, I wanna hug you, not out of pity or worry, just because. I'm glad you're still here. Have you ever shared what made you miserable? Was it the other students? Coming out? Parents? Typical teenage BS? You don't have to answer, just wondering if you wrote about it.

I was a cutter in high school. I use to cut myself. Parents would fight, bring out the razor. Parents divorce, grab the knife. I stopped enjoying writing and the cutting took it's place. But then one day I just snapped out of it.

A girl I knew would eat her hair.

I never talk about it, there are several people who know about it, but when asked i just say that's all over now (which is mostly true, I still have "fits of the sullens" so to say). Anyway, I'm glad you snapped out of it, it's a really tough thing to do. It's funny, but it seems like it takes so much courage to cut yourself, but it takes even more to quit.

 

[cocktales]

NO, I am way too chicken to try and "off" myself.....and I don't like the looks of blood, especially my own!

Sure, I have been extremely depressed, had true feeling of despair; but I always seemed to find an answer or someone always asked me the right question and I poured my heart out to them and was able to settle that which was so horrible to me...

I'm sure, those of us who've actually "tried" the act, now probably feel terrible about trying to end our lives, right?

I would hope that before anyone killed themself that they would seek help from friends or just perfect strangers.....

There's always someone there to offer help or just an ear to listen to what's troubling us...

 

[ladygrey]

After trying, I feel so proud to be alive.

I surived.

And very saddened. Because I know that I'm a stastical rarity. So being alive is wonderful.......but realizing that others didn't make it is horrifying.

So I compromise. I'm proud to be alive and I'm also proud to educate everyone I meet about sucide and never ever walk away from someone who needs it.

Call it my way of honoring those who never made it back.

 

[Paladin]

Have you ever tried to kill (hurt) yourself?

When I was younger (in my 20's) I planned it (suicide) very carefully -

but eventually came to the realization, that...

apart from my friends and family, who would have been very hurt and sad, the real person this would have been hurting was ME.

That no matter how hard life gets,

there is ALWAYS the possibility that things will change for the better.


And do you know what? They DO change for the better. When you make that leap/change/whatever in your mind, you turn a corner, and things DO get better.

TRUST ME.

Do not give up on life. The fact that you are here on this on earth is such a rare and precious thing, do not throw that away.

Much love.

 

[slamminc11]

I attempted it back in March of 2001. At about 8 a.m. took a shitload of ibproffin and aspirin and then, not knowing what to do next, I just went to back to bed firguring I would just fall asleep and never wake up. Somewhere in the afternoon I ended up calling 911 (don't remember it) and came to puking in the emergency room. Ended up spending a five days in ICU (my kidneys had shut down to like 5%). Everything is good now and no lasting effects, which I am thankful for, but the pain and hurt I put my family though is still tough to deal with.

 

[Adam2299]

Joeslifeyork -

Suicide is not the coward's way out, and I'm very offended that you would even say that. Not only have I suffered from clinical depression, but I've considered suicide as a very realistic possibility at my lowest of lows.

Anyone who says suicide is the coward's way out obviously has no concept of what being TRULY depressed feels like. When you're depressed (and I don't just mean sad, I mean clinically depressed), you are literally living in a cloud. Nothing makes sense. It's painful to go through the day and perform the most simplest of tasks.

When people are desperately living in their own personal hell they can't see clearly enough to understand the consequences of their actions.

I could write a novel right now but I'm honestly so furious I just need to go.

 

[MidnightPrism]

I am not going to hurt me... I LOVE ME

I might be homicidal, but not suicidal.

 

[ladygrey]

^^^
Agreed.

Darling, you need to learn that your opinions are NOT right no matter what.

You do not know everything. And having never attempted suicide, you have no idea how much is required to do it.

You just apolijized about being a pooh in another another thread, and now you come here attack people with mental issues?

Honey, my level of respect has GONE way down.

Suicde is complicated. Very complicated. Your friend does not deserve your anger or your hate. He's learning his own lessons right now.

tsk tsk tsk

 

[mike_n_herrin]

No i can't say i have. I do remember as a kid i would have odd thoughs, like "what would happen if i stuck my fingers in this electric outlet?" and stuff like that. But i never have done anything.

I'm not sure if this thread is about something you are considering. I sure hope not. You've only got 2 posts and you joined this month so you might not yet realize that JUB is a place you can talk about your problems and have folks listen and give advice and try to help. it's a great support system and if you are having some trouble dealing with something or just want to talk this is an excellent place to do so. Hot topics sometimes gets busy so sometimes it's not the best place to post those types of things, but on the other hand it will get the most viewing.

Anyway i just wanted to express my thoughts to you and hope you are not considering anything to hurt your self and offer up hugs.

- mikey