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Help an amateur out!

B

Briguy005

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I was out Christmas shopping tonight and was in my local mall's bookstore. I couldn't help noticing this really cute guy working at the register. I hung around as much as possible and from overhearing him talk I'm pretty sure he was gay. So much so that I heard him singing to himself while checking me out at the register. I don't know if he was trying to give me a sign or what. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't bring myself to strike up a conversation or start flirting with him for two reasons. The first being that my cousin who was shopping with me was standing right next to me (and I am nowhere near "out", not to anyone). The second is that I am shy and really nervous. I want to go back soon and try again, but I need some help in approaching him and starting up a conversation. This is a first time thing for me pretty much- but this kid was cute, man! Anyone out there have any good advice?
 
Solicit his assistance with a book you're "looking for." Or, hell, just ask him where the gay section is. OK, if that's too bold, ask him if they carry any Andrew Sullivan books. Or, a biography on Anderson Cooper. Unless he's a total moron (and I doubt he is), he'll get the hint.

As he's walking you to the appropriate section, ask him if he's read any of these. He might ask you what kind of book(s) you like, so be prepared.

The more confused and helpless you appear, the more he might want to help you out (do over do it, though--you don't want to come off as a ditz or space cadet).

Or, leave him a Missed Connection post on Craig's List. Lots of gay guys in service capacities read that to see if anyone has commented on them and missed their chance. You could say that he was a nice/hot/whatever sales clerk at ABC store and you were there, but couldn't talk. Interested? I'll be in again on date/time. Read the other ads--they're good entertainment value if nothing else, and who knows?
 
Averageguy offers the perfect road map.

(do over do it, though--you don't want to come off as a ditz or space cadet).
Click to expand...

I think that AG means don't, but I'm thinking that swooning and having him help revive you may be the other way to go.
 
So heres kind of an update:
I went to the mall yesterday, no not to see him, but while passing the bookstore there he was! UGH so freaking cute once again. Only problem was I was with my cousin, once again. Of course before leaving the mall she tells me that she has to get gift cards from the book store. Yep, and of course he rung us up and as bad as I wanted to say hey, or even smile and nod I couldn't. I was pissed. It's all I could think about, and I was losing sleep over it! So I thought about Facebook, maybe there was a slight possibility I'd find him. After trying a few things I found him, pretty easily. Yes, he is gay, single, and my age. Of course I messaged him after about 16 revisions to my one paragraph message. He messaged me back this afternoon and seems really nice and funny. I replied asking him out for coffee after the holidays, so wish me luck! I am going to need it!
 
averageguy said:
ask him if they carry any Andrew Sullivan books. Or, a biography on Anderson Cooper. Unless he's a total moron (and I doubt he is), he'll get the hint.
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mmmmm, i have never heard of those authors !!!
 
Briguy005 said:
.....He messaged me back this afternoon and seems really nice and funny. I replied asking him out for coffee after the holidays, so wish me luck! I am going to need it!
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Aw, this makes me feel real warm and fuzzy inside. Good luck Briguy.
 
I'm confused.

I'm pretty sure he was gay. So much so that I heard him singing to himself while checking me out at the register. I don't know if he was trying to give me a sign or what.
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Am I missing something? Singing to one's self is a sign of beng gay? Or a come-on to others?

So I thought about Facebook, maybe there was a slight possibility I'd find him. After trying a few things I found him, pretty easily.
Click to expand...

How do you do that without a name?

Of course I messaged him
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I thought you had to be friends to message someone?

Please explain this all to me because obviously I am lacking in knowledge and skills.
 
The singing thing was not a sure-fire sign, but come on now...how many 21 year old straight guys that sing to themselves while working register. I guess you could call it more of a come-on though. Second you can use other things to find people when using facebook like music preferences, location, age, etc....if you know enough about a person its easy to find them without knowing their name. Finally, you dont need to be friends with someone to message them.
 
Briguy005 said:
So heres kind of an update:
I went to the mall yesterday, no not to see him, but while passing the bookstore there he was! UGH so freaking cute once again. Only problem was I was with my cousin, once again. Of course before leaving the mall she tells me that she has to get gift cards from the book store. Yep, and of course he rung us up and as bad as I wanted to say hey, or even smile and nod I couldn't. I was pissed. It's all I could think about, and I was losing sleep over it! So I thought about Facebook, maybe there was a slight possibility I'd find him. After trying a few things I found him, pretty easily. Yes, he is gay, single, and my age. Of course I messaged him after about 16 revisions to my one paragraph message. He messaged me back this afternoon and seems really nice and funny. I replied asking him out for coffee after the holidays, so wish me luck! I am going to need it!
Click to expand...

Glad you were able to connect with him. I know how you felt because I missed several chances to meet guys because of being shy.

My suggestion is to just take things nice and slow at first. Don't try to force or rush anything.

Best of luck and Merry Christmas
 
Haha this is an awsome story, good luck too you but I gotta go with JackFTwist on this one:

JackFTwist said:
How do you do that without a name?
Click to expand...


How'd you get his name, its a pretty mad deal that you found him on Facebook and all that, grats
 
congrats on the catch
im sure he just went with a zipcode search and went off first names may take a while but hey if the intent is there you will find it
 
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