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Homosexuality is an abomination?

charles-smythe

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...too funny not to share...

In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:
...
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there
'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really
necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan.

James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia

(It would be a damn shame if we couldn't own a Canadian :)
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I want to own a couple of Kiwi's, no one told me I could slaves from a neighbouring nation. There are a couple on here I wouldn't owning. How do I arrange that?
 
Did she actually respond to this letter, I wonder?
 
i'm not sure if this is a real letter but it does remind me very very very much of a scene from one of the greatest shows ever on TV



A-MAZE-ING! :)
 
Did she actually respond to this letter, I wonder?

Why would you?

Obviously only one part of the bible is important, just ignore the rest :) :lol:

Although this is probably old copypasta, It amuses me. I wouldn't mind owning a canuk either, they seem cute.
 
maybe planet earth mental resdients fa univere a nuts speices


thankyou
 
So what ever happened to this creature? It is delightful that her career was finally shredded but it is interesting that she and that other truck driver in drag seem to have disappeared off the face of the planet.
 
I would love to see her face opening and reading that.
 
I want to own a couple of Kiwi's, no one told me I could slaves from a neighbouring nation. There are a couple on here I wouldn't owning. How do I arrange that?

I wouldn't; they're shockingly lazy.

Look at Kabluey, Cron9por and Justaguy - always on the JUB, never working. They'd make terrible slaves!

-d-
PS: Their cricket's pretty shit, too. :D
 
The bible says Adam and Eve were chased from paradise cause Eve seduced Adam with an apple (symbol of the most disgusting sin= heterosexuality). If Adam had done been seduced by his sons, we still would be in paradise.

Apple (symbolism) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The bible says heterosexuality is an abomination.
 
The bible says Adam and Eve were chased from paradise cause Eve seduced Adam with an apple (symbol of the most disgusting sin= heterosexuality). If Adam had done been seduced by his sons, we still would be in paradise.

And forgetting the obvious question that- if true- Adam and Eve had two sons. One son killed the other. So, who did the surviving son have children with?
 
biblical answer: Adam and Eve had many children, Cain and Able were just the first ("After Seth was born, Adam lived 800 years and had other sons and daughters." -Genesis 5:4)

OK, I'll bite. Who did the other sons and daughters have chlidren with?
 
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