Hooking up with the Ex

[torontoguy22]

My ex has recently been trying to get in contact with me to meet up. We were talking today, and he quickly turned the intention of our "meet up" into sex. He was a great lover and all (though we only got as far as anal once), and I wouldn't mind spontaneous hook-ups with someone I already know, but is the idea all that great? Can any comment with their own experiences?

Thanks

 

[M4P]

I'd avoid it

He's horny and looking for a fix that is familiar

Don't do it

It will bring all of the emotions back

 

[Homoerectus]

If neither of you are deceiving the other about what your hook-up is all about, and if you are comfortable with each other, go for it. Just be sure you both understand it is all about the sex. The important thing is both of you are comfortablw with the arrangement. I've hooked up with ex'es and we had wonderful experiences.

 

[looseliam]

My ex and I shag when we're in between break-ups.

The emotions don't come back, but the sex is just as good.

It's more of two friends helping each other out.

 

[SantaCBear]

My ex and I shag when we're in between break-ups.

The emotions don't come back, but the sex is just as good.

It's more of two friends helping each other out.

 

[MikeS72]

good one !

 

[looseliam]

She knew you were going to post that.

 

[TygreBryte]

This is a great thread. I would agree in principle. I haven't had great luck with sex with exes, but I've had some. You just have to judge for yourself if there's enough emotional detachment from the bad and fond attachment to the good to make it all worthwhile.

 

[G-Lexington]

You don't mention at all how the relationship was, how the break-up was, how you feel about him now, and how you think he feels about you. All of these factors are far more important than the sheer fact that he's an ex.

Was he clingy when you were together?
Does he get overly possessive?
Do you?
Before you started talking again, if someone brought up your ex's name, what would be your immediate reaction? Anger? Sadness? Warm fuzzy? What?

The answers to these questions will give you a better idea as to whether it's a good idea.

Lex

 

[JackFTwist]

going back to the past, calling one's old partners, can be a tragic lack of imagination or fear of the future

or it can be all the good things people said here

I got back with an ex and we had 3 more good years out of it

while we will never ever be partners again, he was the best sex ever and I wouldn't mind hooking up with him again (in a theoretical way; in a practical way, he couldn't pass enough std and hiv tests to make me feel he was safe even he were encased in five body condoms)

 

[Dejajb]

I've hooked up with my exes before. As people have said, you are helping eachother out!

 

[kellyd669]

I used to bump into an ex ofmine when I would go out to the bars, and at 1st, he'd always be his charming, flirtatious self. Then his true nature would show and he'd basically let me know he just wanted to fuck- it sucked, cuz I had true feelings for this man. I never took the bait, cuz I knew the pain that would follow, so whenever he'd see me out w/ a guy, or, group of guys, he would loudly ask "so...which one of these guys are you fucking"??
What a complete asshole! Every time, I was just w/ friends-when I hd a lover, there didn't seem to be much reason to go to the bars.
So, I could never hook up w/ an ex, but I don't know your situation- I don't do casual, but maybe you can

 

[Ninja108]

no, it will bring all the emotions back. You guys have broken up and moved on, having sex will only bring back feelings that aren't really there anymore