How can u move on if youve found ur soulmate,but ur soulmate doesnt see you the same?

[socal21]

Okay i'd like to start off by saying that if you don't believe in spiritual psychic readings,please just keep your comments to yourself.

...I had a card reading a few days ago,and well I was told that the guy I really love (which is my friend) is my soul-mate,which is why i've felt so strongly about him,and we both got along so well from the get-go,but right now he isn't in the same light as I am. Now you have no idea how much i care and love this guy.He's seeing another guy at the moment,and it's just tearing me up inside,but I still want him to be happy,and think to myself that i would rather have him still as a friend,but what about my feelings? What i don't understand is,where do i go from here? I've felt so sad these past couple days,it's driving me mad.

 

[Gunner57]

Yeah, that's a bad situation mate. Ive just been through the same thing, but with a straight guy. It's going to be tough but i think you need to distance yourself from this guy. Make new friends, take up hobbies etc. It's the only way, especially if the guy has a boyfriend. Although on the bright side, at least he's gay. You could do the distancing thing for a while and see if it looks like they will break up. Don't rely on it too much though!

Take care.

 

[mbamike]

I have been in this same situation.

Earlier this year, I fell for this guy head-over-heels. We spent thet weekend together and he rocked my world in the bed. Life was going to be great if I could get fucked like that on a regular basis.

Well, it turned out that he did not feel the same way towards me. I was just a weekend romp in the sack.

He does not return any of my phone calls or emails. I am completely out of his life.

It took me MONTHS to get over him. I am now seeing other guys, but I am slow to allow my emotions to get involved.

So, until your friend is willing to take it to the next level, it would be best to keep him as just a friend. Otherwise, you may be completely out of his life.

I hope this helps! Good luck!

 

[G-Lexington]

>>>Okay i'd like to start off by saying that if you don't believe in spiritual psychic readings,please just keep your comments to yourself.























Lex

 

[subfer1]

If you dig into information about soulmates, you'll find that your soulmate could even be someone who is related to you, but is someone who truly loves and understands you. According to what some people have said, mine is one of my cousins. I don't really stress over it.

 

[socal21]

"So, until your friend is willing to take it to the next level, it would be best to keep him as just a friend. Otherwise, you may be completely out of his life."

...I have been doing that,and i plan to keep doing that,because i do care for him,and he does tell me things that he doesn't tell the guy he's seeing or other friends. In the past i did tell him i liked him,but it was because i had completely fallen for him really quickly,but it was way too soon to tell him,and he said he didn't feel the same. I understand that yes,mabe later on he will realize that i am the one that really would do anything for him,and stick by his side through good and bad,but until then i know i have to be strong and just keep moving forward,i'm just finding it really difficult where to begin. :/

...I found this online today,and it made me want to stick by him and not lose faith.

"When Soul Mates first meet they sometimes feel as if they already know each other. They may feel very familiar to each other. Soul Mates can have a beautiful relationship together, but it will take work. Soul Mate relationships may last a lifetime and others may only be for a particular purpose and be temporary. You can have more than one Soul Mate in a lifetime."

 

[Telstra]

What is "soul mate" mean to you?

 

[G-Lexington]

IF he's your soulmate - and I remain unconvinced - then he has to feel this connection, too. And even IF he does - and I remain unconvinced - he still has to agree to follow those feelings. If he doesn't, nothing will happen.

I had a friend who was sure he found his soulmate. They talked all the time, they shared everything, but she said she didn't "like him like that". But he was convinced that they were meant to be together, and as long as he remained on good terms with her, she'd eventually come around.

So he waited.

Lex

 

[hanzosword]

I'm sorry your hurting over your friend socal21. Maybe you and him can get together one day if things don't work out with his bf. As for the soul mate thing, I believe that we can have many different types of soul mates and they are not all meant to be lovers either. A soul mate could be a close friend or a business partner. This guy may be a soul mate but he may still be just a friend.

 

[Horschallen]

I went through this similiar soulmate dilemma in 2001. It was a painful ordeal for me and I did a. lot of soul searching with spiritual reawakening. After a year and a half, I finally started to really recover and then another year and a half, I am finally over it, but not totally. Now I still think about him very often, but I do not hurt as much. Sometimes I miss him and sometimes I am so disgusted with him... and other times with myself. What really helped me move on was he moved to California and I moved here to PA in 2004. Now I am almost unwilling to fall in love again, even though I would love to. I also learned that there are MANY potential soulmates around each one fo us.

 

[MarkDW]

I always thought a soulmate went BOTH ways

 

[socal21]

I'm sorry your hurting over your friend socal21. Maybe you and him can get together one day if things don't work out with his bf. As for the soul mate thing, I believe that we can have many different types of soul mates and they are not all meant to be lovers either. A soul mate could be a close friend or a business partner. This guy may be a soul mate but he may still be just a friend.

I agree. My cousin has been talking off and on to me throught the day trying to keep my mind busy,and feel a bit better. I do feel that if we don't get together now,or in the future;were still going to be very close friends,but again since i am the one with the more deep feelings for him, I have to accept that we won't be more than just that,and thats the hard part,but I am willing to do so....i just wished it happen a little faster. I have never fallen in love like this for anybody before ,so it definetely is a challenge.

 

[texpatriot]

I agree. My cousin has been talking off and on to me throught the day trying to keep my mind busy,and feel a bit better. I do feel that if we don't get together now,or in the future;were still going to be very close friends,but again since i am the one with the more deep feelings for him, I have to accept that we won't be more than just that,and thats the hard part,but I am willing to do so....i just wished it happen a little faster. I have never fallen in love like this for anybody before ,so it definetely is a challenge.

Here's the key, your feelings, your emotions, any hurt that you might be experiencing is YOUR responsibility. Not his.

In my experience, "soul-mates" tend to love each other unconditionally, even when there's no apparent reason for them to do so.

If this guy is your soul-mate, as this psychic reader foretells, perhaps the implication is that your "soul-mate" is there to show you what unconditional love is, even though he might not be the one that you should be focused on.

Don't allow your desire to be with him to ruin any chances of a life long friendship with him.

 

[breatheH20]

Since you seem to be emphasizing the "mystical, spiritual" aspect of this trist you two have, take this into consideration.

What expectations or beliefs do you have about a "soulmate"? And just how fixed are those beliefs? Could the definition of that word be larger than the scope you currently hold.

I'm of the stance that a soulmate is someone who you simply share this everlasting, fantastic, deep and loving connection with. I, however, was never under the impression that a soulmate had to be a romantic partner. I've met plenty of friends and amazing people in my life that have made me feel like they were my soulmates, and 99% of them weren't boyfriends..

Do some of the things people have said in the posts; keep yourself busy, if need be, try to minimize contact with this fella until you can handle the situation better. You never know what will come down the line in life, but don't put your eggs in one basket.

If it's supposed to happen, it will. If it's not, you have to face that reality.

 

[socal21]

Since you seem to be emphasizing the "mystical, spiritual" aspect of this trist you two have, take this into consideration.

What expectations or beliefs do you have about a "soulmate"? And just how fixed are those beliefs? Could the definition of that word be larger than the scope you currently hold.

I'm of the stance that a soulmate is someone who you simply share this everlasting, fantastic, deep and loving connection with. I, however, was never under the impression that a soulmate had to be a romantic partner. I've met plenty of friends and amazing people in my life that have made me feel like they were my soulmates, and 99% of them weren't boyfriends..

Do some of the things people have said in the posts; keep yourself busy, if need be, try to minimize contact with this fella until you can handle the situation better. You never know what will come down the line in life, but don't put your eggs in one basket.

If it's supposed to happen, it will. If it's not, you have to face that reality.

I think in my mind,i did have the wrong definition of a "soul-mate"

...there are a couple family members in my family that are married to their soul-mates and therefore i thought for sure it meant it was the one your supposed to be with,and i'm not the only one who thinks this. I decided to do some homework this weekend,and i randomly asked family and friends "what does a soul-mate mean to you? some said it was a person we had a lot in common with,almost alike and could really trust with really anything. And others said it was that,and also the one who really holds your heart in a relationship. This little expiriment helped,i felt a lot better knowing that even though it isn't for sure that i'll ever be with this guy,i know some way or another we'll still be conected as friends,because that's really what we are...really good friends. He's very comfortable opening himself to me about whatever he wants to talk about,and as am I with him.

 

[rottenj10]

I don't feel exactly the same way about "soul mates" or anything like that. I agree with breatheH20 "that a soulmate is someone who you simply share this everlasting, fantastic, deep and loving connection with. I, however, was never under the impression that a soulmate had to be a romantic partner.". That person is my best friend, who is straight, and to whom I don't feel any romantic attraction. But it's kinda like I know that we can discuss everything; I've never had any space in conversation. You should appreciate relationships for what they are; you should not fantasise about what they are not. (I'm only 21, so I give it a two-month period or so in which you may do so lol.)

Not that I have not had an inordinate attraction to a guy. I can't believe that no one has suggested this so far, but it works for me: focus on their negatives. There must be something that annoys you about them. Think about that, over and over again. Is he less intelligent than you, less curious, less interested in travel, etc.

 

[bronzeganymede]

i totally understand how you feel, i was and to a certain degree still am in the same situation. i fell for a guy i thought was perfect and was convinced he and i were meant to be together. we became extremely close but never became more than friends. finally i forced myself to come to grips with the fact that he didnt feel the same wayand for the sake of my heart and sanity, i had to move. i went thru all the extremes with him from pushing myself on him to completely shutting him and being quite mean, not very mature on my part. but love does make you not think clearly. anyway were still close, we still talk all the time and i still sometimes think there is hope but i refuse to wait for it to happen. bottomline, you have to get on with your life. if its meant to be with this guy, itll happen but dont pine and wait for it to happen. dont do push yourself on him, itll scare him away. a little distance might be good, but not too much. maintaining the friendship is the most important thing. hope this helped.

 

[socal21]

i totally understand how you feel, i was and to a certain degree still am in the same situation. i fell for a guy i thought was perfect and was convinced he and i were meant to be together. we became extremely close but never became more than friends. finally i forced myself to come to grips with the fact that he didnt feel the same wayand for the sake of my heart and sanity, i had to move. i went thru all the extremes with him from pushing myself on him to completely shutting him and being quite mean, not very mature on my part. but love does make you not think clearly. anyway were still close, we still talk all the time and i still sometimes think there is hope but i refuse to wait for it to happen. bottomline, you have to get on with your life. if its meant to be with this guy, itll happen but dont pine and wait for it to happen. dont do push yourself on him, itll scare him away. a little distance might be good, but not too much. maintaining the friendship is the most important thing. hope this helped.

Thanks bronzeganymede and your very right,both our situations are quite almost the same,i went through that whole stage of kinda being rude and telling him i didn't want him in my life,all so i didn't have to feel bad about him not wanting me,but your right love doesn't make you think clearly. I should be thankful that he's still in my life (which i am) but i shouldn't worry about anything else,there's little things he says and does that does make me think he cares,but I try not to look at them another way or take them the wrong way either.

 

[ColorSlaughter]

Get real. You're only hurting yourself by digging deeper into this fantasy of yours.