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how come people underrate and underappreciate being single?

  • Thread starter Thread starter refujiunderground
  • Start date Start date
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refujiunderground

Guest
*looks @ how most people that are involved with somebody have to worry about their s/o in some shape or form*

*can do anything that he pleases*

*only has to worry about mother's day, father's day, immediate family birthdays, and christmas when it comes to giving out gifts*

*can enjoy alone time*

*doesn't have to have sex and can masturbate to whatever is on his laptop without s/o being on case*

*has never had to worry about being cheated on, cheating and all the things that comes with a relationship*

*pretty much dips and avoids anytime someone tries to get him to be a love interest*
 
I think maybe I wouldn't mind being single so much, if it weren't for the fact that I've spent most of my life that way. Even my longest relationship (5 years) was long distance, so most of our time as a couple, was spent apart. Yeah, I enjoy aspects of being single, but it gets old (and lonely) after a while. Especially for someone like me, who's a nurturer.

Still, that said, I'd much rather be single that be in an unhappy/unsatisfying relationship. I can't tell you how many of my friends are miserable in their relationships, but either don't want to be alone or feel trapped. I just cannot see how a lousy relationship is preferable to being single.
 
Nbecause it's very easy to fall for the "happily ever after" routine. The idea that one is supposed to find someone to love and be loved by (and presumably have/raise children with), and if you don't, it's due to some failing on your part. If you're single, why then, there must be something wrong with you! You're difficult, you're not loveable, you're somehow "not right". And so many people jump into relationships, feeling any one is better than no one. Sadly, it's that mindset that leads to heavily dysfunctional and unhappy relationships that can be tough to break.

My theory is that it's never a good time for a bad relationship, but it's never a bad time for a good one. It's best to proceed along with the mindset of "I'm happy being single, but I'm open to the idea of a good relationship.". And if you're not happy single, it's best to work on GETTING happy single rather than trying to force a relationship.

Lex
 
refujiunderground said:
*looks @ how most people that are involved with somebody have to worry about their s/o in some shape or form*

*can do anything that he pleases*

*only has to worry about mother's day, father's day, immediate family birthdays, and christmas when it comes to giving out gifts*

*can enjoy alone time*

*doesn't have to have sex and can masturbate to whatever is on his laptop without s/o being on case*

*has never had to worry about being cheated on, cheating and all the things that comes with a relationship*

*pretty much dips and avoids anytime someone tries to get him to be a love interest*
Click to expand...

I'm in a relationship - 8 months now. The only thing different between you and me is that I have to worry about my s/o's birthday and buy him a gift or two at Christmas, otherwise my situation is identical.

I enjoyed being single; I enjoy being in a relationship. You can too.

-d-
 
When you're single by choice, then yes, it's great. If you're single because you can't find someone you like that likes you back... well... it just sucks.
 
^^Oh well, if you can't be one then be the other! :-)

I love being single. Some of my friends are all "Oh Angst! No-one knows pain like mine!" about being single but I love being able to walk out the door without getting "where are you going? Why are you going? Who are you going with? OH GOD YOU HATE ME DON'T YOU!!!!"
 
Most people want to date and find that guy or girl. I'm happy staying single for now. I tried dating...eh...maybe in the distant future :)
 
refujiunderground said:
*doesn't have to have sex
Click to expand...

This is the worst thing to use as a positive in the history of ever!

I've been pretty much permanently single in my (short) adult life with a few dalliances here and there. Am I happy being single? Yeah. Would I like to be in a relationship? Yeah. Can I understand why some people think others need a relationship to be happy or fulfilled? Of course. I think finding someone to love and love you back is ultimately one of the most important things in life.
 
It is a bit like saying it's great to not have money, because then you don't have to buy anything, or worry about anyone stealing it. :)

Lex
 
G-Lexington said:
It is a bit like saying it's great to not have money, because then you don't have to buy anything, or worry about anyone stealing it. :)

Lex
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I was trying to come up with a food analogy but gave up!
 
Because when you're looking for love, there's nothing quite as disheartening as seeing everyone around you pair off while you are left alone.

Because that even when being single is no problem during the day (hell, you might even prefer it), there's a sting of loneliness when you find yourself alone in a bed that should have two people in it.


I don't really care for love or sex at the moment, and yet those two things still bother me.
 
LOVE being single and still hook up! Don't have to worry about cheating.

I do enjoy being in a relationship as well. It's nice to share your life with someone when you come home.
 
loki81 said:
my single friends can't stop telling me how much they love being single and how awesome it is for them.
Click to expand...

Some of them just might be projecting to feel a sense of security.

Those that protest the loudest are often the weakest, and all that psychobabble.
 
my single friends can't stop telling me how much they love being single and how awesome it is for them.
Click to expand...

Mine run the gamit. I have plenty of "single and loving it" friends, and plenty of friends who hate being single. That said, I'm not surprised by your comment.

Lex
 
Ha, it gets annoying when a friend can't hang out because of the girlfriend/wife/whatever, but I think it's lame to say that it "sucks" because they have a kid. Kids are awesome.
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I don't have any issue inviting their girlfriends/boyfriends/spouses/whatever along. A bunch of us get together for game night once a month - two married straight couples and one gay couple make up the core. But we also invite other married couples and singles to join us periodically. And no trouble doing that for other events, either.

And truth told, I've never much liked kids. I didn't even really like BEING a kid when I was a kid - I couldn't wait to be an adult. :) That doesn't mean I'm against kids, or think people shouldn't have them, or hang out with them, mind you. I'm well-aware many/most people really like kids, and that they should be the main priority if you have them. That just means I have to invite those with kids earlier on, so they can check schedules, look for babysitters, stuff like that.

Lex
 
PKMO said:
This is the worst thing to use as a positive in the history of ever!
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how so???? it's funny how people act like having no sex or being a virgin is going to kill them yet when was the last time you heard of somebody dropping dead from "blue balls" or lack of sex? it's the other way around. not having sex won't ruin your life but having sex could.

by the way

tumblr_lkmxkzwyW11qbl1a8o1_500.jpg
 
NaughtyArousal said:
Ha, it gets annoying when a friend can't hang out because of the girlfriend/wife/whatever, but I think it's lame to say that it "sucks" because they have a kid. Kids are awesome.
Click to expand...

:lol: there's always that friend that is either pussywhipped or has that s/o that holds them hostage away from the homies and even family. can't even blame the kids because they wouldn't be around if their daddy wasn't pussywhipped in the first place.

but :rotflmao: it's funny seeing how a homie is laid up in the house chilling and fucking his girlfriend all day, completely forgets to call his homies that he was hanging out with every week running around, talking shit or going to the club or whatever. then suddenly when everything is over, they jump into the picture fronting like they weren't in love. #-o it's crazy seeing the complete 180 and the personality change along with it. you see dudes doing crazy things, doing things that you never thought they had in them and the whole nine because they're :luv:. i hope to never be that way. NEVER. i plan on being the same guy when i'm in a relationship just like how i'm single. anytime where i have to go to extreme lengths to compromise who i am to please my partner, then more than likely, i'll have to call it short. i've seen way too many of my homeboys get hit with that. their lives either got better somehow or they got worse. most people i know lives got worse.

almost doesn't count. you were in love. it's okay, everybody falls in love sometimes except for you.
 
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