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How did you finally accept it??

D

djmigra

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I've pretty much got all of the signs....just can't figure out if its for real or not. I always felt different since I was younger. In my younger teenage years I stumbled across some gay porn and beat off like a maniac. I never really checked out guys, I found girls attractive, but when I beat off it was only to gay stuff. I've had girlfriends, but could never perform sexually with them, which I chalked up to anxiety. I've never been with a guy, and have never thought, "oh he's cute", or had a type. Could never see myself with a guy in a relationship, but rather with a woman. I"m now in my 30's and have been jacking off to only gay material since I was a teen. I feel like i'm straight, except for when it comes to getting off. Anyone else had this problem or am I going insane???
 
I'd say you're gay, but I'm not you. Self awareness and honesty ought to be your guides. PM me or others if you'd like.
 
I would have said you're bisexual, but when you said you could never perform sexually with girls, that makes me think you're gay rather than bisexual. Really though the answer is within you only and nobody can decide for you, though we can offer insights here and Seasoned is one of the best here. For me, accepting it was mostly a matter of realizing it was a good thing about me, not a bad thing, as most people are taught to believe. And that it offered some really nice rewards, specifically love and sex. It's not like a handicap or anything, which offers no benefit, you just accept and live with it. It's like a treasure box of goodies that is waiting for you, if you just accept that it is what you want and that it's OK to want it. Then the treasure box opens to you. This may seem like a silly or juvenile way of looking at it, but in some ways it's true.
 
The reason you can't see yourself with another man isn't because you're not attracted to them, but because you don't allow yourself to be. You're afraid of it, and it's natural, but it's also wrong.

I was kind of in the same situation for many years. I didn't consider myself gay, though I jo'd exclusively to gay porn and could never do anything with a girl. It's called denial, and at some point I got sick of it and told the world I was gay. That's how I told MYSELF I was gay. Things changed dramatically then, and only for the better.
 
It's easy to be turned on by a guy, it's hard to fall in love with one. If only men had caring hearts like women (without them losing that jock-ish masculinity that you're so turned on by), eh? =D

The ambivalence of your orientation, comes from deeply knowing how much men suck in social situations and with emotions. It's natural for that to make young men feel like it will make them lose their humanity. Those feelings are normal, and I think we all go through it.

But I think we train others how they should treat and respect each other too. There will always be 'sleaze fags' that just like to use you like one piece of kleenex, but a healthy, loving (and emotional!) relationship with two men is still possible.... but it will take more effort and work.

I've discovered like Joe Kurt says, men who were in previous relationships with women are much better communicators than men who are 'purely gay.' So what you're really worried about is losing the 'womanly touch' that women teach us in social situations, like how to be compassionate towards other people and patient/gentle.
 
slnattak said:
It's easy to be turned on by a guy, it's hard to fall in love with one. If only men had caring hearts like women (without them losing that jock-ish masculinity that you're so turned on by), eh? =D

The ambivalence of your orientation, comes from deeply knowing how much men suck in social situations and with emotions. It's natural for that to make young men feel like it will make them lose their humanity. Those feelings are normal, and I think we all go through it.

But I think we train others how they should treat and respect each other too. There will always be 'sleaze fags' that just like to use you like one piece of kleenex, but a healthy, loving (and emotional!) relationship with two men is still possible.... but it will take more effort and work.

I've discovered like Joe Kurt says, men who were in previous relationships with women are much better communicators than men who are 'purely gay.' So what you're really worried about is losing the 'womanly touch' that women teach us in social situations, like how to be compassionate towards other people and patient/gentle.
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Lol that was wildly sexist and false ^_^
 
I'm more feminine when it comes down to sex then a woman I'm more into the kissing and when it comes down to fucking he decides
 
You're obviously curious about guys. Quench your thirst for men and just try something with a guy. You'll know if you like it or if you don't!
 
nigga-you-gay.png
 
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