How Do I Tell If My Classmate Is Gay?

[Jory]

Next time you see him try to put into the conversation: The Abbey, Here , Rage,or any of the West Hollywood clubs/bar For example; "Last saturday I met some of my friends at The Abbey for dinner and drinks" and if he says oh I love that place and I love Rage........gay

 

[Yves]

Why do you need to confirm his sexual identity? Is that necessary to develop a friendship? Is the need to test your gaydar a potential obstacle for friendship?

Just give the guy some time and see if a natural friendship develops. IMO being "gay-friendly" does not translate into an automatic friendship. I know a lot a gay friendly people and not all of them are my friends.

Once I took a course and a "gay-friendly" female classmate was in a similar dilemma. She insisted on gay topics ("last night I was watching Queer as Folk", "it's so hot to see two guys kissing", "i need a gay friend to go shopping" etc) but she did not succeed. Most situations she mentioned were forced in some degree. In my opinion, she was more interested in testing her gaydar than in developing an adult friendship . The guy in question was gay but he felt her approach did not respect his boundaries or the professional setting. Just give the guy some time and don't waste you energy on clues. We tend to share things with people we feel comfortable with.

 

[Yves]

Yves, she doesn't want to know who he has sex with to be friends. She wan'ts to give him a good seeing too in a man/woman kind of way. She can't do that if he would rather Nick Lachey then Jessica Simpson.

I understand that. In a way the situation described by Stacy is context-dependent. It's not the same to be in the same situation in a liberal school in Manhattan or Berlin v/s a Catholic school in a traditional community. Stacy is open minded and her school is probably not that traditional. With some time and interaction they should be able to see if they get along as friends. My point is that some gay guys feel uncomfortable if someone forces gay topics that are not clearly related to the relationship in question. For others, that's an opportunity. I was just trying to mention pros and cons. Not all gay guys are the same.

 

[gsdx]

Just say to him real fast "homo say what" If he replies "what?" then you know he's gay. Works every time.

If he replies, "What's milk got to do with it?" then you know he's Canadian.

 

[gsdx]

I don't think anyone, including gay people have 99.99% accurate gaydar.

I do. . . however, it only works 23.7% of the time.

But, when it works, I'm 99.9% right!!