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How do you suggest I deal with a liar?

capchino2009

capchino2009

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I've been dating a guy for about a month but have recently found him to be a huge liar. He works at a casino I frequently visit (slot tech) and we have been conversing off and on for about a year. he told me he was in school working on his masters and a girl who he car pools with was his cousin but I found out she is his ex as she informed me on a recent trip there. He also forgot he was attending CU and says he's at DU. The other things have to do with being in the marine and having his twin pass away which his girlfriend informed me are his favorite lies. Worst thing is he asked me to pick him up at the library one day but he had clearly been drinking but he wouldn't admit it and brought it up a lot after. I have questioned him on lies before and he gets upset. I guess im kinda dumb but I always believed him and now I just hope he can stop. Every time he tells me something I just find it hard to believe now. in some ways i just want him to change and some im disgusted and done. Can a liar change?
also : he is cute as hell and otherwise self sufficient.
 
wave bye-bye on your way out the door, he sounds pathological.
 
I once had someone who I really really really cared about and wanted to get more involved, but he was a compulsive liar. He justified his lying by saying he did not want to hurt me. While it was sweet of him, I found it still painful. Sigh.
 
Move on as fast as you can. It's only been a month or two. You don't want to be with someone five years from now, asking yourself the same question.
 
Trust me. Hanging around this guy will make YOU crazy. Be good to yourself.
 
I dated a guy once who would lie if you asked him what time it was. They don't change...and no one is that cute or hot. Spare yourself frustration; get out quick.
 
Have sex with him and couple of more times to get off out of your system...and then walk in the opposite direction.
 
I was all set to tell you to dump the mofo...until you said he was cute. Cute guys are pretty tough to come by, and you can cut them a lot more slack when it comes to...

...kidding.

No, he won't change. Especially since there's no reason to change. Either put up with his BS, or put up with him being your ex.

Lex
 
If he is doing this from the start, then you have known.

But it's what you do from here forward. Juts flat out tell him that you feel he is not truthfull. And you feel the that is a problem. So just put some distance and keep your wallet tight and dont let him get close to do damage
 
He called me asking for a bottle of my wine as he is having straight friends over for dinner and he is short cash (no mention of inviting me but Im not interesd). I just don't know cause I almost can't stand him because I can think of numerous lies I suspect he's told me and its making me crazy. how fricken dumb was it for me to hook up with a guy at a place I love to play? I know he's just one guy and it's just a casino but it was a place I enjoyed(I have vip status). its not the wine being expensive because it isn't but its giving him anything when he has little regard for me. Does he think he lies to me because he needs to? could he love me and just not be able to stop lying? in any case I really only want to move on and be able to go to that casino like I used to.
 
Someone very close to me (won't say who) lies more than anyone I've know. I think it's pathological opposed to compulsive, though the classification in this case hardly matters. I'm past the days of hoping he will change, and have finally accepted that fact.

In short, no, it's doubtful he'll stop. His lying will eventually make trust impossible (if it hasn't already) along with any type of meaningful relationship.

Sorry.
 
I had a really hot guy who was actually very nice and fun to be with, and that body :drool: ...but he was a liar.

He always had some story about how he had lost his wallet, or he had some crazy thing happen and he was broke but he'd pay me back, blah blah blah.

I didn't want to get rid of him partly because he was friggin' beautiful and I figured I'd never get a guy as hot as him, but largely because I kept hoping that the bullshit would finally end and we could be equals.

Well it didn't end, and I ended all communication with him after about a month. He played his game very well, making me think he cared for me, but that's how these people operate. They lie and they manipulate people.

And ya know what? Not long after I moved on from him, I met my current boyfriend. He is 10 times sexier than that boy was, because he actually loves me and I love him.

Don't get stuck with crap, keep moving until you get someone worthy of your time and affection.
 
well I let him pick up a bottle of wine and hope he will enjoy his dinner tonight but im growing tired of other things he says like calling me richie boy and silver spoon and maybe its because he tells others lies about me. i was really smitten with him and now im almost resentful for the waste of time cause even the sex was a bit lacking. I am pretty much looking forward to dumping him and not considering friendship after. too many lies even when he called me he said he was having people over for the Rockies game which is actually almost over while his dinner is an hour away. it seems so evasive that I wouldn't be surprised he was having a dinner date (ok may be my mind wandering) because my house sitter says he used my cologne when he picked up the wine. I just can't wait to end this now.
 
Um, you don't have to wait for HIM to end it. It can end immediately if you so desire.

Lex
 
I was gonna say, what are you waiting for? Him to tell the truth?
 
capchino2009 said:
well I let him pick up a bottle of wine and hope he will enjoy his dinner tonight but im growing tired of other things he says like calling me richie boy and silver spoon and maybe its because he tells others lies about me. i was really smitten with him and now im almost resentful for the waste of time cause even the sex was a bit lacking. I am pretty much looking forward to dumping him and not considering friendship after. too many lies even when he called me he said he was having people over for the Rockies game which is actually almost over while his dinner is an hour away. it seems so evasive that I wouldn't be surprised he was having a dinner date (ok may be my mind wandering) because my house sitter says he used my cologne when he picked up the wine. I just can't wait to end this now.
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So why are you in here asking us? Sounds like you have your answer.

What do you want out of this guy?

If you just want a good time, take what he says with a grain of salt and have a good time. If not, walk away. End of problem.

Where's the issue?
 
I got things straight with the casino and expect to see him tomorrow but he did borrow a platinum chain I want to get back and he never called me back tonight. im gonna dump him cause I just hate what I feel.
 
I'd say give him the platinum chain as your farewell gift, and get on with your life. But I seem to think we've been here before...

Lex
 
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