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How far off am I?

CagedBird

CagedBird

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No problem here, just curious to hear what you guys think about my take on sex drive.

My bf and I have been having sex for about six weeks now [twice daily].
My bf hints my desire for sex is getting annoying.

My bf is 45, I'm 50. I assume my libido to be average for a gay man my age.
Am I far off on self reflection of whats considered "average" for sex drive, or would you be annoyed a bit by a bf who makes sexual advances towards towards you daily?

Bird
 
To be perfectly honest, when I first started reading I almost immediatly started thinking 'woah, slow down, you'll give yourself a heart attack at your age.'

Then I started thinking, at your age, having so much activity, that's got to mean you had a good, healthy lifestyle. *props*

I'm no expert by any means, but I would say low it down a little.
 
I'd say your libido is a bit higher than normal, but that's not the issue. The issue is that it appears to be higher than your partner's. (If it weren't, no problem, right?) And that's not necessarily a problem - at least not a solveable one. However, it's something that's best solved by talking to him rather than us. Just ask him how often, roughly, he'd like it. And arrange for him to have a way to let you know he isn't interested right then if you initiate it.

Lex
 
I don't think it has necessarily to be a question of his libido.

I could easily go twice a day every day, but it would be at the expense of doing other things.

Maybe your boyfriend is just getting bored of the routine and would like to spend some time doing something else.
 
Who is kidding who? My libido is alive and well at age, uh, over seventy. Just wish I had the opportunity to do daily doubles.
 
I have a similar problem...I don't know if i have a low sex drive...but my past 2 bfs have wanted sex...for the sake of having sex...which started to bore me. I wanted to do something different .. or try something new... and in the end it just annoyed me too much amongst other things.

I think its finding a balance between both your sex drives.
 
I agree, find balance between your sex drives. There's nothing wrong with jerking off every now and then.
 
I'd say you're libido is great, but not the average for a 50 year old. Once a day at that age is great--twice, I believe, is a bit high.
 
I'm 55 and twice a day for me would ROCK!!! I think my libido and yours I'd say are higher than the norm but who cares it's just about finding a balance as others have said. I also say YEA FOR US!!!!
 
I think I'd have no problem wanting to be fucked however many times a day a boyfriend might want to get hard for me - and I'd probably solicit him and really annoy him if he wanted a quiet time - I've always been like that since college when I was much more active and bi than my hetero married state now. But frequency of my fucking a bf would probably be a lot lower. I guess you are still in the head over heels in lust stage and your boyfriend completely does it for you. How long have you been going out? The 6 weeks you mention or longer? And what was your frequency with your last boyfriend? Maybe your libido is just right for you and as commented on it's just a bit too over the top for your boyfriend. There's a risk, I would think, that your bf might feel controlled and owned by you, not a nice feeling all the time. On the other hand, asking all the time isn't so good either. It seems there is a need for better balance though.
Merry
 
huggybear said:
I think I'd have no problem wanting to be fucked however many times a day a boyfriend might want to get hard for me - and I'd probably solicit him and really annoy him if he wanted a quiet time - I've always been like that since college when I was much more active and bi than my hetero married state now. But frequency of my fucking a bf would probably be a lot lower. I guess you are still in the head over heels in lust stage and your boyfriend completely does it for you. How long have you been going out? The 6 weeks you mention or longer? And what was your frequency with your last boyfriend? Maybe your libido is just right for you and as commented on it's just a bit too over the top for your boyfriend. There's a risk, I would think, that your bf might feel controlled and owned by you, not a nice feeling all the time. On the other hand, asking all the time isn't so good either. It seems there is a need for better balance though.
Merry
Click to expand...

Ok huggybear:

[1] Yup, aprox 6 weeks for sex.

[2] My previous BF's were actually GF's; yes Im ashamed to say Ive been faking
my life as a str8 man having sex with woman [this is my first man/man relationship]. Even so, I admit my GFs also complained about my need for sex. I never paid much attention to that as I figured woman just like to bitch & use sex as a tool in relationships.... far more than men would anyway.

My bf & I had a bit of a "discussion" about several issues in our relationship.
I agreed to extend the courtesy of backing off sexually. I figured Id just wait for Jack to make the advances.
Funny thing since we had a discussion about my seemingly excessive desire for sex, Jack is the one now pushing for sex; for the last two days. Im so confused, maybe Jack wants to be in the drivers seat on this issue...whatever....just so we rock in bed:sex:
 
kcboi said:
I'm 55 and twice a day for me would ROCK!!! I also say YEA FOR US!!!!
Click to expand...


You bet kcboi!

Btw, I love your "Additional Comments":

"I believe in random acts of kindness; I long to total abandon in the art of lovemaking; I'm enough of a romantic to await the knight in shining armor and enough of a realist to know that flowers are not always the right answer... but the NEVER hurt, right?"

Btw, I've been giving Jack flowers every three days w/o fail for the last month.
 
So, I've been thinking about this.

If all you seem to want when you guys are together is sex, then maybe he wonders if that is all the relationship is about. And maybe he wants more. Like just knowing that being with him is enough for you. Just to spend the day with him and not need anything more.
 
i think libido and sex drive is more related to the person than the age. As everything in a relationship balance is crutial as mentioned before. But let it flow don't push him and don't let him push you.
 
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