How to severe ties when he's done nothing wrong

[crubbed]

We met. He had a girlfriend. We had sex. Twice. All kinds of amazing the first time (3 hours...). Meh the second time (I was too anxious). Then I left town. He broke up with his girlfriend, entered a couple of insta-relationships, came out to his parents. The whole time, we kept texting each other. Now we frequently call each other.

Problem is, I'm in love. I told him and he was as understanding as possible. But I need to forget him. I'm living in a small village with my parents right now, and it's hard to meet new guys. I think I should cut off contacts with him. But it's not easy because he's never done anything wrong.

In the past, I have indeed cut ties off with guys. But they were guys who did me harm. I was able to cut them off and remind myself how awful it would have been. With him... although he isn't perfect, he's always treated me quite well. But I hate that he makes me feel like I'm out of his league.

He genuinely wants to hear from me and I'd hate to ruin everything. Maybe I should just tell him to cut it off for the time being? (meaning- forever). What would you do?

 

[LuckysRevenge]

So what do you hope for? I think we're missing a few details. Are you just talking? Do you want some kind of future with him?

 

[HunterM]

Wait...you're in love with him. Now that he's out and single, you want to forget him?

Or...you're in love with another guy...and you want to forget him?

 

[medic1]

Talk to the man, at least show him that respect. Instead of hoisting your own insecurities onto him.

 

[Seasoned]

Talk to him. Feel free to better describe the situation for us if you wish.

 

[crubbed]

Thanks for your replies guys, I'm sorry about the lack of details. It's just we live in two different towns. Hundreds of miles from each other. And I don't plan to ever go back to where he lives, because of my job. Still, we've kept texting each other daily. He calls me as often as he can. I'm not even checking my Facebook any more because any pic of him makes me drool. He loves me as a friend, but I just can't with this any longer. I'm just worried that if I cut off contacts, I'll regret it big time.

 

[HunterM]

Don't cut off contact with him. Like others have said...talk to him. Let him know your predicament of living miles apart due to your job. You two could still visit each other, right? He could come visit you. You could go visit him.

If he understands your dilemma, maybe he'll look for opportunities to move closer to you in the future.

 

[LuckysRevenge]

Thanks for your replies guys, I'm sorry about the lack of details. It's just we live in two different towns. Hundreds of miles from each other. And I don't plan to ever go back to where he lives, because of my job. Still, we've kept texting each other daily. He calls me as often as he can. I'm not even checking my Facebook any more because any pic of him makes me drool. He loves me as a friend, but I just can't with this any longer. I'm just worried that if I cut off contacts, I'll regret it big time.

What would you regret? I would lessen contact with him. Talk to him about it and maybe take a break until you get your head clear. Your current situation sounds unhealthy, especially if you don't plan on ever moving back to the other town.

Additionally, it would be unwise for him to move to you or closer unless he has some other reason. Right now, you're infatuated with a fantasy. Unless you want to fall deeper down the rabbit hole, something needs to happen.