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How to tell if someone is lying to you online?

StakeMe

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Hey guys,
So I am having the hardest time figuring out if this guy I am talking to online is the real deal or not.
He approached me on POF and we started to chat on MSN...we exchanged pictures and had long great talks. When i was hesitant to cam with him he kinda lost touch for a while and we stopped talking. He said it would be the only way for him to feel comfortable ever actually meeting me because he had never really done the online dating thing before. After a long while of not talking anymore i randomly Msg'ed him one day, he seemed hesitant and after me continually messaging him first for about a week i got the feeling he was becoming more comfortable and he started to actually initiate conversations. He would send me pictures of himself with full back stories and we would have serious heart to heart conversations about family and life as well as goofy small talk. I feel like i got to know a real person as much as you can through the internet. One day i got up the courage to actually cam with him, when the call came online there i was but he wasn't there for me to see him. He said he had a really old computer and a lot of the time the camera just didn't work. (suspicious...)
We eventually made plans to meet and I was really excited...about 2 days before we were due for our date he msged me and told me he had a family emergency. 3 days later he filled me in and told me his brother died in a car accident and that he had to go back home to be with his family for a while. Everything seemed so legit and we talked a lot when he was back home.
We continued to talk for the next 2 weeks and would flirt and compliment each other online. We would email each other all day long.
He eventually asked me if when he gets back we could go on a official date. I was really thrilled and told him i would love to and gave him my phone number so he could text me and get ahold of me to organize the date. He said his phone was upstairs and that he'd send me a text in the morning. Since then (4 days ago) I haven't heard from him. I've emailed but no response.
This is really summing up the story but I just feel really confused. Why would someone pretend to be someone else if they didn't want anything from me. He never asked me for money or anything like that. He would send me recordings of him singing at gigs and pictures from his day he would take with his blackberry.
All I have from him is his email address and his skype name. He also gave me an address of his parents house where he is staying but i haven't been able to find a name in the white pages or anything.
Do you think this guy is playing me? If so how can i find out if he is real or not? Does anyone know of a way to background check online or something? Any tricks to finding out if someone is lying?
If he is a fake why would he just stop talking to me all of a sudden? if we've been talking for weeks everyday...
Has this happened to anyone before?

Thanks Guys!!
 
Unfortunately, this happens ALL THE FREAKIN' TIME!!!
When the time comes, they suddenly back away and just stop replying and/or block you on msn, etc.

I say go with your gut feeling...it's usually right. We just tend to rationalize and overthink everything while ignoring our intuition.

You can try google his skype name and msn address.
Other than that, I'm not sure if there's much more you can do.

But I understand you, trust me. It's frustrating and it pisses me off when someone does that. I just feel like punching the fuck outta his face.

But get used to it...most of the guys online are players, true assholes.
 
I would move on. There are guys online that won't lie to you. I also think if you haven't met within a month, that's not a good sign. You don't want to waste your time with someone who you haven't even met. I met my current bf online and we've been together for almost 3 years, so it is possible.
 
Okay, something you're going to need to learn when you're dealing with people:

99 times out of 10, when someone says there was a "family emergency", and that some random family member "died in a car accident", THAT'S A LIE. It's especially suspicious if they don't even seem distraught about this apparent death at all. I've had someone use this excuse before, but he was an absolutely horrible liar, so I knew better (and laughed to myself).


Camming with someone before you meet in person IS a really good idea, and i'm glad you thought of that. . .but next time, you'll know to make sure that THEY can get on cam, too before you jump on cam. Never, ever ever do the one-sided cam thing.
 
Thanks Guys!
Now that I look back i feel like such an idiot...my god! haha
I figured it out too! Yay me and my mad detective skills!
The guy sent me pics from another guys facebook profile but didn't change the name of the file. When you pull pics from facebook they have a file name with the ID number of the profile they came from. I punched in the number into facebook and tada! The names did not match...GOD i am an idiot haha, at least now I know!! haha

So follow up question. I am able to msg the guy who's pics they are to tell him some jack ass is impersonating him...do I do it? Or is it out of my hands now?

I've already emailed the impersonator at his fake address and threatened him i'd tell the guy, not that anyone would be able to figure out who it is anyway.
 
Thanks Guys!
Now that I look back i feel like such an idiot...my god! haha
I figured it out too! Yay me and my mad detective skills!
The guy sent me pics from another guys facebook profile but didn't change the name of the file. When you pull pics from facebook they have a file name with the ID number of the profile they came from. I punched in the number into facebook and tada! The names did not match...GOD i am an idiot haha, at least now I know!! haha

So follow up question. I am able to msg the guy who's pics they are to tell him some jack ass is impersonating him...do I do it? Or is it out of my hands now?

I've already emailed the impersonator at his fake address and threatened him i'd tell the guy, not that anyone would be able to figure out who it is anyway.

Not true. You leave traces everywhere you go on the internet. Someone skilled enough could easily track him down.
 
you can't ... it's one of the big mysteries of the world...
 
Not true. You leave traces everywhere you go on the internet. Someone skilled enough could easily track him down.

Yea, there is an article in this past Sunday New York Times Magazine about how the internet never forgets. It's very disturbing really. And anything you do can be tracked down.
 
I guess all of us have to be suckered once or twice as an initiation to online dating. The bad part is that there are some real people out there who are what they say, but the fakes ruin it or at least make it harder.

But the truth is that a guy can also be everything he says and still turn out to be a dick.
 
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