In a small school, in a small town, one lives under the watchful eyes of folks who know your family and every family. Not the best place for finding oneself, sexually speaking.
I recall that I became aroused often and prayed that my hard on would escape notice. It did, or else those who noticed were to polite to respond with either a look of amusement or disgust.
Most of my male peers were physically more robust than I and had a rather narrower range of interests than my own. I had not much intellectual stimulation from them. They were more sexually adventurous with the girls and a bit stupid; one of them became a father before he was seventeen, the only married "man"
in our graduating class
I never dated any of the girls but I enjoyed their friendship and shared many interests that the other guys weren't capable of even discussing. I was in that setting the very different one; but, I don't think any of them had or have any idea of where my life and my head has been sexually; I was and remain for all of them deeply closeted.
In my junior year a great guy joined our class. I was in heaven; he was delightfully "different" and we were sufficiently mobile (thanks to our bikes) so that we could be "away" and alone together. By graduation time we were soul mates. We continue to be soulmates. We educated each other in so many wonderful ways; that relationship was liberating. I'm a big booster of male-to- male friendship and I add that I don't think that needs to include or exclude "going all the way".
I marvel that granted the community I grew up in, I managed to grow up with a healthy attitude toward life in all it's complexity and possibilities. I enjoyed the older people in my town; they had come from the "old country" and were delighted to find teens who could speak their mother tongue. The editor of the local newspaper took an interest in me; I was interested in a lot of the things he covered in the paper.
When I remember the attempt at "sex education" in our town"s school, I have to smile, but we all survived it somehow.
I recall that I became aroused often and prayed that my hard on would escape notice. It did, or else those who noticed were to polite to respond with either a look of amusement or disgust.
Most of my male peers were physically more robust than I and had a rather narrower range of interests than my own. I had not much intellectual stimulation from them. They were more sexually adventurous with the girls and a bit stupid; one of them became a father before he was seventeen, the only married "man"
in our graduating class
I never dated any of the girls but I enjoyed their friendship and shared many interests that the other guys weren't capable of even discussing. I was in that setting the very different one; but, I don't think any of them had or have any idea of where my life and my head has been sexually; I was and remain for all of them deeply closeted.
In my junior year a great guy joined our class. I was in heaven; he was delightfully "different" and we were sufficiently mobile (thanks to our bikes) so that we could be "away" and alone together. By graduation time we were soul mates. We continue to be soulmates. We educated each other in so many wonderful ways; that relationship was liberating. I'm a big booster of male-to- male friendship and I add that I don't think that needs to include or exclude "going all the way".
I marvel that granted the community I grew up in, I managed to grow up with a healthy attitude toward life in all it's complexity and possibilities. I enjoyed the older people in my town; they had come from the "old country" and were delighted to find teens who could speak their mother tongue. The editor of the local newspaper took an interest in me; I was interested in a lot of the things he covered in the paper.
When I remember the attempt at "sex education" in our town"s school, I have to smile, but we all survived it somehow.
