I can't believe it's really happening!

[mojoe54]

Two years ago, when we were on vacation in Italy to attend his sister's lesbian wedding, my boyfriend proposed to me. We've only been together 28 years! I don't think either of us thought that much about getting married before, but seeing them celebrating and basking in the the love and respect from family and friends really made us want something like that for ourselves. So we set a date for November of this year and today I sent out "Save The Date" announcements. I can't believe we are really going through with it! We've reserved the hall and everything.
I'm nervous because although my bf's family is 100% for it, my family is a little more iffy. There are several conservative Christians in my immediate family,and I don't really know how they are going to react. They've known I'm gay for years,but it's something we've never talked about. I know if they reject me I will feel hurt, but not enough to spoil our special day, I hope.

 

[Boogerqueesha]

WOW holy moly, congratulations! Where's it happening?

 

[shea]

After 28 years and you still want to do this.
Don't let anyone spoil that day. The very
best of everything to you and your love, you
deserve it. God Bless.
Shea

 

[skibby]

Wow, that's wonderful. Are there any surprises left after 28 years?

If your family cares about you, and I'm sure they do, they'll just keep quiet with any disapproval since it's your special day. If they really don't approve they'll just be unable to attend the wedding. They love you, they'll be supportive.

Congratulations! God, I'm tearing up.

 

[martin6]

Hey I don't even know you and that's the best news I've heard all week!! I would say I wish you the best, but it seems you already have it!!

 

[antdak]

Very nice to hear! congrats to you both! I would not worry to much about the Christian family members. It would be their loss if, they don't want to share your special day with you!

 

[mojoe54]

Thanks guys! I so much appreciate your good wishes and support. One clarification,though! I worded my first post incorrectly. When my bf proposed to me we had been together 28 years. Actually it will be 30 years together this fall. Our commitment ceremony is how we are choosing to celebrate our 30th anniversary. Sometimes I think I'm the luckiest man alive!!

 

[luminum]

28 years? marriage should have been right around the corner, silly! Congrats! Go throughw ith it. It's your wedding. What your family thinks is only based on their prejudice toward your sexuality, not the wedding, so I would put it into perspective.

 

[star-warrior]

Congratulations! As for your conservative family members, invite them too. Whether they like it or not, it's your day. If they're gonna be sour, at least show them that you have more support than they can muster

 

[operafan]

bootyboi - congrats to you and the boyfriend. Have you decided if you will call each other husband after the ceremony or will you still be BFs?

At any rate - sincere best wishes for the great day. I think 30 years together deserves one hell of a big party.

 

[mojoe54]

bootyboi - congrats to you and the boyfriend. Have you decided if you will call each other husband after the ceremony or will you still be BFs?

At any rate - sincere best wishes for the great day. I think 30 years together deserves one hell of a big party.

Thanks for the congrats,and that's a good question. My boyfriend read these posts with me,and I asked him if he would call me his husband;he said probably not. We've been calling each other boyfriend for 30 years,and I think it will be hard to change that. In some ways I'd rather be a boyfriend than a husband. I guess that boyfriends seem more romantic than most of the straight husbands I know. I also think that maybe if society as a whole gave more credence to our union I might think differently.
But,ultimately, that stuff doesn't really matter. I think what is motivating us is that after being together this long we want some kind of formal,public acknowledgement of our relationship. And we really want to celebrate with our family and friends. So far our response has been very positive,though I haven't heard from any of the more conservative family members yet. I suppose I've given them a choice that they have to think about.
But you're right,if they dont come they are going to miss one hell of a party!

 

[mojoe54]

Congratulations! As for your conservative family members, invite them too. Whether they like it or not, it's your day. If they're gonna be sour, at least show them that you have more support than they can muster

I agree. I am inviting all six of my siblings and all of my nieces and nephews (13). I know most of them will come if they can. There's only a few I think won't come because they are homophobic. But two of those are siblings,and I would really hope that they could overcome their prejudices and just be there for me. We are a pretty close family,so maybe they will surprise me. I'm really hoping for that!!

 

[Ninja108]

Congralutions on the wedding. As for the family, those who love you and care about you will be there. And kudos on the 28 years, one can only hope all of us are as lucky as you are.

 

[G-Lexington]

Bootyboi, your relationship has lasted more than twice the length of the average "real" marriage. It's clear that you two are already married - this ceremony, as nice as it will be to have, will simply be confirming what's already known. Congratulations to both of you, and don't let ANYTHING spoil your day. If family members choose not to show up, they'll simply miss out on a wonderful event - that's all.

Lex