I feel bad !

[Liverpool-uni]

Hey Guys ,

I felt very bad and confuse for the last two days … so, I’ll share what happened with you and hope you can let me know what you think about it..

I am a university student, bisexual but not open about it yet ...
On Halloween night I went to a gay club and there I met normal guy, he said was straight then turned bi (or gay maybe ..I am not sure as I was drunk ! ), he said he had just one BF but not anymore (as he said his BF cheated on him so they broke up) and he didn’t have GF or BF since then (he said he is not good looking person to attract others! (and that’s true) ) .

We talked for couple of minutes then we started to kiss …we had couple of pics together then he said he wanna and if I am interest I can go back to his place .
He is a university student as well but from different university.

You can imagine what happened later …

I didn’t have gay sex before …we kissed for couple of minutes ,he sucked me for a bit and then we decided to have sex … (everything happened fast! )
I told him it was my first time, so he said he will be gentle …to be honest it hurt me and I asked him to slow down couple of times .. he was very gentle and he kept saying sorry whenever I moaned …

The whole thing was quick, he cummed then he wanked me off ( I didn’t ask him to wank me off but he just did it and I didn’t mind ).

It sound like he was in control but the truth is I wanted it to happen in this way.
Later he dressed up and I started to do so.

I gave him my mobile number ( I don’t remember if he asked for my mobile number or I offered it to him ), I told him that he can add me on facebook and he agreed.
That what happened and since Saturday night I didn’t hear back from him.

I know it’s been just two days since the thing happened ,but as a bi guy , I usually contact a girl after we exchange numbers , ( I didn’t ask for his number in that night).

I feel very bad now and dunno if he considered it as one night stand or he just doesn’t want to make a fast move.?!!

 

[G-Lexington]

Welcome to JUB!

Well, if he's the only one with a number (you didn't get his?), the onus is on him to make contact. If he hasn't, you can assume that although he may have enjoyed himself that night, he's not really interested in anything beyond that. I wouldn't sit around waiting for a phone call at this point.

Did he use a condom? If he didn't, I'd say you have a bigger problem than him not calling...

Lex

 

[KingofFaeries]

I'm with lex, was latex covering his penis when he penetrated you? (Lol I love saying the same thing in a different way sorry.)

In the event that a condom was used, I'd still go get tested just to be on the safe side, since you didn't know him.

Last but not least, you were drunk it was halloween, he was probably drunk. You went and had the sex, that seems to me like a one night stand if you haven't heard anything yet. Sorry bud.

 

[KaraBulut]

Ditto on the condom concerns.

Underlying your post is the question, "Is it me?".

The answer is, "No". You're a decent guy who calls when he says he will call. You're not a guy who just gets drunk, uses someone for the night and then doesn't call them again.

Unfortunately, not all guys (gay or straight or whatever) are like you.

OK. You've done that bar hookup thing. It sounds like you wanted more from the guy and he wasn't mature enough to offer more.

So, next time think a bit more about what you want- dating? fuck-buddy? relationship? and work on getting that.

 

[spencer]

It's good to find out what you like and don't like. Don't continue to hook up randomly cause that's not your thing.

 

[texpatriot]

What the hell?

You got your bottom knocked out for you ya!

Though I have to admit is a privilege only reserved for guys that I really care about.

Save yourself some anxiety and don't ever let anyone penetrate you until you're certain that you might actually want to see them again.

This way you won't have to worry about whether they call you back, or if you might want to go out for a round of STD testing at your local clinic.

We all live and learn right?

 

[treanir]

The question "when do you call someone" can be difficult. Too soon and you may be perceived as too eager. Too late and you're going to come across as not interested enough. That middle ground is the perfect time. Unfortunately, your middle ground (1 day) may not be his middle ground (2+ days).

However, he hasn't added you to Facebook. That could've been done in a minute. The fact that he hasn't added you says more than the fact that he hasn't called you. I take that as a sign that he wasn't interested in more than a one-night stand. I don't think he is going to call, and I'm fairly sure he wasn't interested in more than sex. Sorry.

If you want to prevent this from happening in the future, you need to do two things:
1) Know what you want and make sure you're on the same page. If you're looking for more than just sex, make sure he is as well. Otherwise you will keep bumping in to "is he going to call?" And you don't want that.
2) Be realistic. Most guys in bars are only up for one-night stands. It's possible to find more, but the "just sex" guys are the vast majority.

Hope this helps and that it doesn't happen to you again.