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i have THE worst taste in men

..........
FangBanger09 said:
and the reason im posting on here is bc my best friend thinks that i shouldnt even bother with it since hes an excon so i just wanted to see what yall think... i mean he doesnt have many people that are there for him so i dont wanna just turn my back on him.
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bouncer... and we've been acquanted a few times but we just had an actual conversation recently
 
I really think he sounds like a keeper. Ex-con. Bouncer.

And from everything you've written, I have to say that I for one think you'd be just perfect for one another.
 
no, i dont work at the club but ive been a few times... and yea, i know hes gay. he used to date a friend of mine but he got dumped.
...and what exactly is wrong with being a bouncer, rareboy?
 
i would do that but im not sure ill have that opportunity... plus he's still a little hung up on his ex so i think it might be best to just be friends. i think thats what he needs during this whole situation. if he doesnt get prosecuted, then we'll see..
 
Let's pause for a moment and recap....

  1. Impersonating an officer
  2. Crimes while impersonating an officer
  3. Still hung up on his ex (after being in prison and away for 5 years?)


FangBanger09 said:
i shouldnt even bother with it since hes an excon so i just wanted to see what yall think
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Being an excon isn't a reason not to involved with someone.

However, #1-3 above is as good a reason as you're ever gonna get. Just pick one or all.


FangBanger09 said:
i think it might be best to just be friends. i think thats what he needs during this whole situation
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If you were his friend before all of this came up, it would make sense.

But it just sounds like you're in "rescue" mode. It's a little late for that.

Maybe it might be better to find some other means to channel this wish to help someone out- preferably with someone or something that you're not attracted to and that is not going to just break your heart and disappoint you in the end.

 
in his defense, the crimes that he commited were like 6 years ago and i really do think hes changed alot since hes been in jail... and he only started dating his ex about a month or 2 ago.
but you're right... i do tend to have a soft spot for kinda pathetic guys who are in a bad place.
 
FangBanger09 said:
in his defense, the crimes that he commited were like 6 years ago and i really do think hes changed alot since hes been in jail... and he only started dating his ex about a month or 2 ago.
but you're right... i do tend to have a soft spot for kinda pathetic guys who are in a bad place.
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Captain Save-a Ho to the rescue!!!!

Crimes he committed six years ago he's not been tried for until now? I don't buy that, unless it was really serious and they just found the bloody pipe.

Did you not say he's still hung up on a guy he's only known for two months?

Didi you not also say you were just going to be friends?

I admit, I'm confused.

What exactly is it you want out of this?
 
I don't know what the big deal is. You don't like him anyway, so why are you so hung up over him? You are more attracted to complicating yourself to this situation than you are to the human being who's trying to deal with his own shit. It's his life and his business. Live your own.
 
tx-beau, ur right, i am captain save-a-ho but i just wanna be friends with him
just believe18, im not hung up over him... but why are you commenting on my life and my business? bc i asked for advice. he asked for a friend so thats what im being..
 
i was going to say wait until he gets out of jail he might end up turning gay if you know what i mean.
 
ex-con... enough said.
i mean i didnt know him before he went away but apparently five years in prison changed him because i dont see how he coulda been convicted in the first place. i mean i dont even like him but i am very attracted to him and hes a really nice guy.
ok, take ur best shot.
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Ok Let's re-cap here.

Nowhere in the original post is there any indication that you are looking for advice.

The fact that you say you don't even like him diminishes the necessity or sincerity of your avowed attraction to him.

And then you ask for people to take their best shot. What is that supposed to mean? That we're supposed to agree that your taste in men is apparently execrable? That you are incredibly shallow for the 'ex-con enough said' comment?

That you should be applauded for wanting to be involved with a guy you don't even like? That you should be applauded for being a one-tween John Howard society?

And then follow-up with a lot of sketchy stuff about what his crimes were and about how you apparently aren't capable of understanding the nature of his charges or how his prosecution works.

This is pretty much like your previous thread. It starts out with just a blog entry; all breathy and declarative; no request for actual advice. No clear explanation of the situation. More of the barest short story outline. And every post by your faithful readers is reduced to an attempt at extracting enough detail to make any response relevant or to get even the faintest idea of your motivation.

But yet you say throughout that you're looking for serious advice.

Well here's some.

You need to start giving some thought to the type of man you want to be when you grow up. Whether you're going be some dys-functional hysteric who runs to a group of avatars every time you give a guy a hand-job in a movie theatre, or when someone calls you at 3am in the morning, or when you meet some guy that you apparently have no feelings for but want to make out with because he 'Hott'. An emotionally healthy, maturing guy would realize that a help board isn't just a blog site or their personal diary. You need to start developing filters; to know when you should be giving thoughtful reflection to a situation and developing your own opinion and response without having to ask friends or even worse, strangers what they think about it or what you should do.

You need to realize that every event doesn't have to be fraught with dramatic potential.

You apparently like to write gay Harlequin romance 'bodice rippers', based on what you've posted in the fiction section.

Perhaps you should this a vehicle as a way of learning how to deal with every situation that turns up in your life.

If that doesn't work for you, then I would suggest that you should seriously seek out a counsellor to help you develop the coping mechanisms that you'll need in order to be a healthy and self-sufficient adult gay male.
 
TX-Beau said:
My brother (straight) calls that playing Captain Save-a-Ho.
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I like that. It needs a comic book or an avatar, though. :)


JustBelieve18 said:
why are you so hung up over him? You are more attracted to complicating yourself to this situation than you are to the human being who's trying to deal with his own shit. It's his life and his business. Live your own.
FangBanger09 said:
just believe18, im not hung up over him... but why are you commenting on my life and my business? bc i asked for advice. he asked for a friend so thats what im being..
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Sometimes what we do here in the forums is hold up a mirror. And people often get angry when they don't like what they see.

JB18's offering advice that is worth thinking about. In so many words he's trying to tell you that it's important for you to separate your problems from this guy's problems. It's back to that "rescue" thing.

You're getting a lot of confrontation here on the issue about your feelings for him. You've said that you don't have any romantic interest in him but it just seems like there's more. That's not intended as an accusation- just some feedback that maybe you need to think a bit more about why this thread's subject was "I have the worst taste in men"?
 
rareboy, all i can say is if you dont like what i post, dont reply... seriously just leave me alone.
karabulut, id have to be crazy not to be romantically attracted to him... but im not gonna tell him that and i didnt plan on bringin it up here bc he has too much personal baggage for me to deal with. i was simply asking if its at least worth staying friends with him
 
thank you... i know that would be the only way to make it work but there's still the whole situation with him and his ex and id rather not get in between that.
plus, im 18... i have crushes every week. im sure this is nothing more
 
Makes you wonder how many of the guys on here who seem really young are in fact really young.

Some of the advice we give is really not appropriate for a 14 year old teenager.
 
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