I Hooked up with my roommate. suggestions/opinions/advice

[sharkattack2222]

Ok this is kinda long. And I want some opinions so that's why I chose to post my experience. I have lurked on this site a few times in the past as i have always thought about experimenting with the same sex (although i am not gay) and thought this was a good time to actually post about a personal experience.

ok. so for the past few months I have been living in an apartment with a few roommates. 2 are gay and the rest are straight. this has nothing to do with the gay roommates, it has to do with the roommate i have been closest with throughout the time living in the apartment. anyways, the other night i came home from work and some of my roommates were drinking. my roommate "jake" came to my room and offered me a drink. so i drank it and then headed into the living room to start drinking with the others. "jake" and my other roommate were already hammered so i decided i would catch up and eventually did.

anyways, the night went on (now drunk) we continued to do some of the normal crazy shit we do like drunk facebook and streak and just random but funny stuff.

later that night my roommate was laying in his bed trying to sleep while jake and i were wrestling cause he had thrown my mattress onto the floor. once i got it back onto my bed, jake put me into a headlock and than passed out laying next to me.

the night continues with what happens to be tension, as i explore his thigh area with my hands. im so surprised i remember it all happening, i guess i kinda was hoping it would happen sooner or late rthough. anyways, i decided i wouldnt touch his dick just incase he was awake, so i was just feeling around actually getting pretty horny until i noticed he was getting a boner. i pretended to be asleep and about 5 minutes passed. he got up off my bed and headed back into his room. he said something but i couldnt hear him so i continued to pretend to be asleep.

i then get a text message from jake roughly stating (and all of his texts were perfectly spelled and everything. if that makes a difference?) that... he was awake the whole time and gave me so much opportunities and couldnt believe that he was telling me this so im lucky hes drunk.

i said... im sorry. didnt know you wanted to fool around. im drunk too. sorry. nother time maybe?

he responded... are you serious?

i didn't get time to respond before he texted me again

he than responded by saying he wasn't gay but just horny

so i responded.... no shit. me too. and im not gay either.

next he responded by saying it might be awkward but he was in the living room

i responded... i dont want it to be awkward though

next he responds... the only time im offering it. always wanted to know what it was like to suck a dick. already gunna be awkward now so might as well do stuff and give it a try

i respond... were drunk. but it might still be weird

next response... alrite last chance, im in the living room. im too horny. might as well. tomorrow will be funky and i kinda need to know.

i responded... either way, you prob wont talk to me after this internship although wish we could still be friends. so who cares i guess

next response... of course we will still be friends. it gunna be awkward no matter what though so might as well give it a good reason.

i finished by responding... i guess your right. but ill try to not make it that way.

than i met him in the living room and stuff happened. both gave eachother hj's. than moved onto bj's. and than he wanted us both to take turns fucking eachother. we both werent really comfortable with it and that didnt last long so went to bed.

the next day was kinda awkward but not as bad as i thought. we still talk to eachother and stuff as much as we used to. but the last 2 days he hasnt really joked around with me or fooled around with me (like playing around beating eachother up and stuff).

the closest weve ever come to fooling around before this was another drunk night when he had the idea for us to streak and fall asleep in our halway so that our other roommates would be like "wtf" when they woke up next morning

we all move out of our apartment next week and im kind of upset that jake and i will lose touch or wont be as good friends leaving this internship as if we would not experimenting with eachother.

i guess im just trying to figure out what everyone thinks about this whole experience. honestly, if i knew jake was ok with what happened i would do it again.

 

[sharkattack2222]

Re: Hooked up with roommate. suggestions/opinions

to clear some things up.

Jake and I still havn't talked about what happened. He says he doesn't remember anything from the night but continues to contradict himself by mentioning things that happened. Except nothing about our experimenting and when my roommate was joking about us spooning cause we were so drunk. I laughed it off and he said he didn't remember. This happened only 2 days ago btw.

 

[MarkDW]

Sounds to me like you 2 need to talk. And don't take the "I dont remember" crap.

 

[kramer362]

You are fortunate that he's not being too awkward or ignoring you, and that since you're all moving out this could all 'go away' next week. I say confront him not being a dick but just say that it's obvious he remembers what happens, that you don't regret it but that you don't think of him as any more than a friend. Tell him you wanna stay in touch once you move out. If you act like it wasn't a huge deal or something to be ashamed of maybe he'll take a cue.


PS: and if you both liked it you need to consider that you might be bisexual and not just curious..

 

[Blueboy369]

You're all moving out next week anyway so at least you had a night to remember. Chalk it up to a fun experiment.

 

[sharkattack2222]

i don't know if i will talk about it with him this week. the only way i will bring it up is if we have another drunk night (which im sure we will). i will text him talking about it or just letting him know that i already got over the awkward phase and i would honestly consider doing it again. i want our last week to be fun though. im sure we will still stay in touch so im not worried about that. him and my actual roommate were the closest ones to me this whole entire time.

im wondering if he did what he did that night only because he was "drunk" or if he really just wanted to experiment with me.

anyways, anymore advice/suggestions/opinions.

thanks everyone for what you've given so far.

 

[sharkattack2222]

I don't know if you read the whole thing, but we are both straight.

I personally have been curious though and open to experimentation since my Freshmen year of college last year.

So he is fooling around with a straight guy just as much as I am.

We are still friendly with eachother as we were before. The awkward stage lasted only a few minutes the next day as we ran errands and stuff. we were forced to talk to eachother which was a good thing. we just havn't talked about what happened that night though so im wondering if i should bring it up with him. let him no that it didn't bother me and i'd be willing to do it again.

i'm not attracted to him more than just a friend and found what we did more as just fun and experimentation. It wasn't like we were looking for a relationship with eachother.



I wanted some opinions on what happened so i would figure i would post it here since I have known about this site from a previous time.

 

[sharkattack2222]

This is the first time i've ever fooled around with a guy.

And I only lost my virginity a few months ago meeting a girl on this same internship however she left to go home in June.

And I'm not asking any of my gay roommates, they will assume I want to hookup with them. They always hit on us and stuff. I know not all gay guys are like that though.

I personally would never fool around with a gay guy though because I feel like he would be expecting a relationship out of it or something. A bit off topic but that's always how I've felt.

Anyways, he's awake now and we've already talked and joked around and stuff.

So I guess it must not really be that awkward for him either.

I guess i should just try to forget about it aswell (if he has) and just worry about our friendship. If it's going to happen again, it will happen again as randomly as it did last time. And if it does happen again I would assume it wouldnt be as awkward the 2nd time because we got over it the first time.

 

[sharkattack2222]

And if I'm not straight and I am bicurious than he's bicurious aswell since it was also his idea to fool around. And in that case I don't think what happened was that bad of an idea. We were just experimenting with eachother and stuff.

 

[954dude]

^ Not everyone is the same. If the guy is straight, he's straight. He doesn't seem to want any relationship with man...it's all curiousity and sexual.

We're entitled to our own definition of our sexuality, even if it confuses us.

 

[Agoateeguy]

Well, another way to look at this is about testing limits and boundaries of "friendships" however you define them. You both took a chance and experimented and now you are left to see how you feel about the experience. It's not that much different from two gay guys or a guy and a girl doing it. We are all left afterwards to decide what it meant for us and how we move forward. And that is the key, how to move forward. It sounds like you don't want to remain "stuck" with these vague thoughts and feelings and maybe talking to him about it is the best way out. If he knows you are straight and just experimenting while being drunk that might just do the trick.

 

[sharkattack2222]

that one guy that keeps commenting this just sounds bitter about everything i've had to say. If you aren't going to read everything I wrote. Please don't judge me or my friend.

And I'm pretty sure we were both just experiencing. From the text messages he sent me, it looked like he also was just looking for experimentation.

anyways, if people are going to continue to post their advice i'd appreciate it. everything has helped so far exact for that one guy that continues to tell me I am gay.

we were both in the same situation. drunk and experimenting. so i guess talking about it will be the best way to go about it. im going to wait though because it's not awkward at the moment. talking about it could be what makes it awkward

 

[d1919v]

Wow some people on this thread are too opinionated. My advice, do what feels right, it'll all blow over with time.

 

[biguy732]

All right - calm down. I think we can all agree that you are both in the "Bi-Curious" stage - the "totally straight" boat set sail a while ago. Yes, he initiated the fooling around - and maybe that is all he wanted to do and he realized that it was not for him and he has satisfied his curiosity. If he does not want to talk about it - let it go. Trust me, if before the week is over and he wants to fool around with you again he will - but like I said, maybe he satisfied is curiosity and does not want to be sexual with a guy again.

And enjoy your last week together - and if that means no more man2man sex, then so be it.

That's my 2 cents.

 

[CGHJ]

It happens, I meet a lot of straight guys that want to experiment. It doesn't make you gay, or bi-curious, it means that one time when you were drunk you were curious. You might be curious again in the future, but there's no need to go around letting people like MoltenRock apply labels to you or plan out your new 'out' life for you.

Yes, more often than not the guy says "I don't remember anything" when he does. Just let it go. You had fun, and if you don't get all weird about it he might want to have more fun in the future because he'll know it's safe to play with you.

Trust me, if before the week is over and he wants to fool around with you again he will - but like I said, maybe he satisfied is curiosity and does not want to be sexual with a guy again.

And enjoy your last week together - and if that means no more man2man sex, then so be it.

Listen to this guy, not MoltenRock.

 

[youngnihilist]

Maybe there are straight guys who experiment once when they're drunk, I can buy that. But you've made the effort to come to a gay porn site. That's going a little beyond straight.

 

[sumyungguy]

Maybe there are straight guys who experiment once when they're drunk, I can buy that. But you've made the effort to come to a gay porn site. That's going a little beyond straight.

Whatever. Listen to CGHJ. Don't listen to the labelers, they'll just judge or catogorize you, and tell you"this is what to expect" instead of giving you sound, unbiased advice.

Kinda been in the same boat, except: I've always felt that I was bi, we were'nt drunk, and he actually decided a couple years later that he WAS gay and lives with his boyfriend now, despite being known as a regular poon-hound on campus. He was really confused and had a pretty fucked up childhood, but that's another story.
Anyway,
It was an experience dude and if you're both str8, there is a chance that neither or at least one of you won't like it. Just chuck it up as life and move on. If the guy still wants to be friends, cool. But don't hound him about it, that will just chase him away for good.

Seriously on another note, drunk fucking isn't all that great, str8 or gay fucking. You lose sensations when you're intoxicated so the feeling of someone giving you a bj probably won't feel as good when you're sober.

 

[genthree]

a gay website is probably a good place to do a bit of sounding out. there is some good advice to be had here and i am not in favour of people being either bitter and twisted or judgemental. if you have got to dip your toe in the water and if it all seems too hard, continue any further experimentation anonymously ie in the gay scene. don't blow a friendship and only continue if both of you can discuss this in a sober and blameless way. if he is straight , give it a miss, it is too much of a head fuck - i've been there.

 

[syoBsUtsuJ]

I agree with CGHJ - you both had fun; why overanalyze the whole deal? I totally consider myself gay, but there will always be the rare, occasional chick that entices me. Now if I were to have funzies with her and spent weeks, if not months overanalyzing said experience would only diminish said experience for what it was ... FUN!!!

Relish the experience and memory! Carpe Diem!

 

[mike_n_herrin]

first off, stop listening to anyone who thinks they "know" what you are by simply reading a few posts on a message board. if you say you are straight then that is what you identify with and that is all that matters. personally i wouldn't bother labeling yourself anyway. rarely are the labels inclusive enough to meet every situation.

secondly i think he's telling you he doesn't remember because he doesn't want to talk about it. that's how you are avoiding the awkwardness of the whole thing. i would just leave it alone personally. you had some fun with a nice guy that you also thought was hot. leave it at that.