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I just wanna say...

bwbw86

bwbw86

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This goes to any of you who are hurting, pining for a boy whether he's straight or gay, depressed, in the closet, self conscious, self-loathing, so on and so on. Turning things around isn't as hard as it sounds. I felt like so much of my life was a failure and became extremely frustrated to the point of deep depression. My relationships whether they were romantic or platonic, seemed to be huge failures. I over-ate, overslept, stayed cooped inside too much...sometimes I feel like I hibernated through my summer. It's not a good way to live. You spend too much time wanting and wishing and thinking that other people are amazing and you are sub-par, that's hard on your soul. I'm not sure what clicked but I feel like I've turned my life around. I've been eating better, exercising and most of all...keeping positive. I remember when my life was a consistent low with short highs. Now the opposite is true, my life is consistently great with the small inevitable lows. I don't think it's this way because of changes around me. I still don't have the boyfriend I thought I needed to make my life complete. My family still does not accept my homosexuality. It's even winter, one of the worst we've had in a long time, and yet I feel refreshed, optimistic. I'm a new guy.

I know sometimes our problems and feelings are bigger and more damaging than a simple change of perception, but I really just wanted to let you know that it does help. Please don't think that things can't get better. Life is rough and isn't fair but it isn't impossible.

:D
 
Thank you for your considerate post.

Congratulations to you on your self improvement!
 
Hey bwbw,

Your story is inspiring and I too feel like it's made me a bit hopeful. I don't know how things ended up 'clicking' for you, but I hope I get things to click for me because I want it badly now.

Glad you're feeling a lot better!
 
Thank you for sharing such a wonderfulllllllll outlook :gogirl:
 
Thank you so much for your post. I'm actually in the process of doing alot of what you talked about. 2007 was...rough...to say the least, and I withdrew. But I had a clicking moment too right before summer 2008(I think it was when I realized that I can only live for me, and hope that I can find someone to share the ride with). Now I'm back in the gym, eating better, sleeping the right amount and generally pretty happy. Some days are still bad, but overall I'm much closer to the person I want to be, and the person someone else might want to be with.

All that to say, thanks again for the post (*8*)

-Stephen
 
Well, you just described a great part of my 2008. However, like you, I'm not allowing that to come into 2009. Congrats on your ability to move on--it's a good feeling, isn't it?
 
Good for you bwbw86 ! It's a new year and a new time and ur message is well-timed ! Usually keep my yap shut around here but I just wanted you to know how much I applaud ur positive message. Here's hoping everyone finds a way to discover new joy and greater personal freedom, whatever it entails ! Thx.
 
Brilliant bwbw, just brilliant!

Its pretty empowering to see a normal guy make change and find some of that elusive happiness we all chase so much!!

Thanks for sharing I hope the rest of your journey surprises you and fulfills you the way the start has!
 
Thanks for the warm response guys. It means a lot to have support and encouragement from strangers. If anyone ever needs to talk just send me a pm...or post on here :-).
 
That describes a lot about me, kind of eerie honestly, but thanks! Hopefully I can be so strong!
 
Thanks for the words for encourgement! I needed that!

Congratulations on your new perception on life!
 
Oddly this was me for a good year. I was getting attracted to someone online while I was away from my hometown, and he and I eventually started talking a LOT! A few weeks later he said he wasn't interested in a relationship, but about a month later I discovered he began one with someone else, and it shocked me. I was angry with him and sent him an angry message, which basically screwed up any possibility of a friendship. I knew I screwed up and apologized, but it was too late.

I spent the next 16 months or so basically in self-pity, angry with myself about my reaction. I let my emotions get the better of me. It was destroying my life, bit by bit, every day, until I decided to confront him about it. I had the chance to go to a friend's going-away party, where the guy would be, so I went there with one of my friends as I didn't know what my reaction would be. Well the guy never showed up, but I still felt confident in myself that I was able to stand up to him and be willing to apologize for good. Just the fact that I was willing to do that was enough for me to stop caring about the guy, and it opened up so many more possibilities and avenues of happiness in my life.

Since then, my life has made an extreme turn for the better. It's still a bit rocky in some places, but I do have to say it's a lot better than it was before. I've got a ways to go before I get back to where I was a couple years back (just about happy every single day) but I'm on my way now.
 
I'm glad you turned your life around. I don't know how you did it but good job.

I'm kinda in a mix up myself. While I think I'm an awesome person, my social life is next to nonexistent and it affects me deeply.

I wanna change it so bad but really, I'm not the most social person ever, although I do enjoy being around people.

Anyway, I just felt like I should post and say cool. Glad you are pretty much happy all the time. :D
 
AstareGod said:
Since then, my life has made an extreme turn for the better. It's still a bit rocky in some places, but I do have to say it's a lot better than it was before. I've got a ways to go before I get back to where I was a couple years back (just about happy every single day) but I'm on my way now.
Click to expand...

At the risk of hijacking bwbw's thread, (although I reckon he'd be happy to see others confirm what hes advocating and his own great experiences), thanks Astare for also proving that sometimes we are our own worst enemy and just as easily keep our selves "down" as anyone else can.

And yet, you two guys are proof that with some determination and some courage - actually a good dose of it - you can also lift yourself up, dust yourself off, learn and most importantly move on.

Its great to see you guys make such important changes on your own and its even better to see you remain as upbeat and positive as you are!
 
thanks tallguy, you are absolutely right!

just wanted to let you guys know that I've lost 9 lbs so far :-D
 
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