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I love him so much it hurts...

Have you felt this way about another man?


  • Total voters
    53
No. I haven't. I'm not saying it's abnormal though. You just have to put it in perspective. It's your brain chemistry going through a certain high. There is nobody that great. It's your mind playing tricks on you. If we could operate on your brain and alter some chemistry then suddenly you'll hate him..

Six months later, and while the "high" has subsided, my feelings for him remain the same. ](*,)

Oh well. On the bright side, it's not at a restraining order/fatal attraction extreme...
 
I used to feel this way, but at the time I really had no self-worth. Not saying that that's what is going on with you at all, but at least for me, once I started working to be happier with myself (still a work in progress), I've been able to maintain much healthier perspectives in relationships, and even crushes. It's better for me and it's better for them.
 
It's funny because the last man I was seeing said all of that about me, including the bit about staying with me even if I cheated on him. He had had a few boyfriends in the past that had cheated on him and he'd end it, but he said I was different; special.

He asked me. I told him the truth, or at least what I feel the truth is now. I don't know how I'd react after many years. I can take on almost anything, but infidelity is the deal-breaker for me. I know how I am: I would never cheat, never have, never will, and there's been plenty of temptation. I'm not like that; I expect the same from him. He still stuck with what he originally said.

It ultimately didn't really matter because it didn't work out for reasons I'm not yet aware of. It was so weird. I hadn't even been with him for 2 months and he said I knew more about him than anyone else he had dated. I wasn't surprised because it took a lot for me to crack past the miles of walls he had built up after getting fucked over so many times. I guess he panicked once he realized how close I was.

But to answer this, I haven't yet felt this way, but I've been close.
 
He doesn't.

The same thing happened to my ex before him, he just had to wait until I moved on to realize his "true feelings" for me.

I'll never get why some people have a chance at love--or at least happiness in a long-term relationship, but turn it down for whatever reason--only to realize that they're lonely and miserable once it's too late.

(I'm saying this from my perspective; I can't speak for them)
 
Is it wrong that i think these kinds of feelings are insane?

No, just realistic--particularly if you have, in fact, experienced them yourself.


It's nothing to look forward to! Especially if it's unrequited. I guess "you live/you learn", but I remember actually feeling sorry for friends of mine that were going through an emotional hell over a breakup, and being grateful that I've never been that pussy-whipped (at the time, or cock-whipped now).
 
No, and I won't.

Not in the sense that I won't ever love anyone, I'm not a robot or anything, but I won't allow anyone to have that kind of hold over me.

It may sound like I have some sort of bitter world view, which I don't, but honestly, everyone can hurt you if you let them and everything is fleeting, so I don't put myself in a position where anything can be that intense.

Like youngnihilist said, nobody is that great. I'm never going to be afraid to walk away from people that are ultimately bad for me.

As cold as that might sound, I do wanna say I wouldn't just walk away at the slightest hurdle, but the kind of extremes you're talking about, that's not me.

I hope it works out for you. Remember to protect your heart and whatever happens, things have a way of working out eventually, even if it's not in the way you thought it would.
 
My first "love" with a straight guy when I was 15 turned out to be nothing more than emotional dependance. Our friendship ended almost overnight when he refused to speak to me (I was 17 at the time). We got on really well but in the end had little in common and I look at pics of him now and think, so what? me and his younger brother are still friends and have been for 16 years but we don't mention what happened with his older bro, its the perverbal elephant in the room so to speak!. As much as the rejection hurt, he could have made things a lot worse for me.
 
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