I need to talk about this somewhere

[thermodynamics]

This excuse gets overused, but PMS??? Something else (bad) that happened today?

Finding a job is tough stuff. I don't think it should bother her as much as it seems to. As a person going through college with a significant "fund" from relatives, I've had the same type of reaction when they find out how much I'm worth. But they get over it. And she should too. Stick to your guns man.

 

[trawler69]

I'm really sorry mate but I can only say what i see. I don't care if you are Gay, BI or Straight, you do not need this. If she flips at you trying to better yourself because you are paying less attention to her, or that she dissagrees with what you are doing, by flipping rather than talking about it. You would be well shot of her. And if you were Gay you would be well shot of him. You don't need this grief, you need support in a partner. That is what partners are for, you become a team. This is not what you have got so get out.

Sorry it sounds harsh but I think you deserve better. And I have read some of your posts before I replied.

 

[trawler69]

I can see where you are coming from and understand how you feel because you have strong feelings for her. Thing is my advice can only be based on my feelings. In fact it is not so much advice, more how I would respond in the same circumstances. Of course you have to deal with it in your way. My way is probably totaly wrong for you. I am very independant and don't like to be called out on my descisions without a rational conversation. I hpe you understand where I am coming from.

 

[Jeimuzu]

I would suggest that she's had an absolutely awful day. Maybe she's feeling the strain of distance, or something to that extent.

My mum's always telling me to get a job, but I have too high standards to work somewhere fast food related, or anything like that, and I'm not short on money anyways. I have plenty and I don't drink, smoke, or have any other expensive habit.

It's not like I don't want a job. I do, really. I just don't want to work in KFC, or somewhere.

Anyways, Jordy, if I were you, I'd just personally wait until you next talk to her, and if she's still angry, then I'd be worried. Otherwise, I'd assume she needed to let off some steam.

 

[lonnie1]

Just chalk it up as a bad day. See if you feel the same way tomorrow. I think you need to think about what you want. The fact that you're on a gay website seems to suggest that you have strong sexual feelings toward males. This could be part of your frustration. Long distance relationships are hard in any case, but it sounds like she may have pointed out something to you that you should take to heart. GET A JOB. That's the best way to shut that kind of talk down. While $16,000 may seem like a lot of money, it isn't as you'll soon find out.
See how you feel in the morning.

 

[bayern20]

Some tough love for you.

You are not looking hard enough, she is right. If you really wanted a job, you WOULD have one.

The problem for you is that for some reason you cant get motivated. What that reason is should be quiet clear, but you do realize it would have to be dealt with which will just create more problems for you. I dont know what it is, but maybe, you dont really love her and dont feel that she is worth the money you have? (that it should all be yours?) And if you start working, she will want it shared, and you dont really want that.

You know what you dont like about this situation, and its not that you are just lazy and dont want to work.

 

[inlovewithanton]

Sounds like shes on the rag homey. I dont trust anything that bleeds for 7 days and doesnt die. lol.

Sorry. For real though, the first thing I would tell her is she needs to check her tone, and put an inside voice on. If she isn't willing to talk to you about these things that are obviously of great concern to her, in a normal civilized way, then yall dont need to talk about them at that point in time. Ive found its always best to walk away from a confrontation, breathe, count to ten, and clearly think out what both of you want to say before things like this happen and leave you feeling frustrated and dumped on.
Having said that, if she flips out about a cell phone case, what's she going to do with something that actually matters? There's definately some things you should think about before going ahead with the whole moving in thing. Just because you love someone doesnt mean that you are actually compatible personality wise. It may hurt like a bitch but sometimes letting go is what needs to be done.
Having said THAT, lol, I hope it does work out for you two. I always root for love in the end. lol.

 

[Riverrick]

You did a really great job of handling that and negotiating a solution, Jordy. I'm also impressed that you were willing to take a hard look at yourself and your own issues at work here.

I'm hearing some social anxiety on your part. If that's so, it can be very hard to break out of your safe zone and enter a work environment. After all, there are all of these strangers there you have to spend the day with and that can be scary.

But it is worth doing. Because after a while, you will become comfortable being around your coworkers as you get to know them and settle into your job. You'll even be a little happier as time goes on since you have people to chat with during the day.

Good luck. Keep us posted!

 

[inlovewithanton]

EDIT: I just wanted to add something here...I've only been on JUB for a couple of days, but I can't tell you how thankful I am already to have so many wonderful people here who are willing to offer help, advice, or even just lend an ear. Sometimes I feel like I don't have a whole lot of people I can go to when I have problems or issues to get off my chest...so I wanted to say a big thank you to everybody who's ever replied to anything I've written here, or even for you guys who may not be posting but who I know are reading. You guys are great.

Drop me a pm anytime. I'm always available for my wonderful brand of advice/humor at inappropriate times. lol.