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I really need advice, Can I get a second chance?

kyless85

kyless85

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About two years ago I started meeting some of the wrong people in the gay scene, i'm in the closet, but they were not. They were just a few though. I was close to them for about a month, until I realized that being friends with them was gonna out me, they weren't really good persons to begin with. So a year after that, one of my closest friends told me a girl from school, that I don't even know, had told him I was gay, but thet he didn't believe her. I looked for her on facebook and she was friends with the guy that must've told her, one of the guys I had met a year before.

It's been two years since I've spoken to any of them, but I feel like they don't leave me alone, everytime I walk by them, I feel them looking at me, and talking. I've told them being gay was just a phase, I didn't even do anything with any of them, no kissing or anything, we never went to a gay bar either. I was very dumb back then. So now i've met this wonderful girl, i'm in love with her, and willing to leave everything else behind for her, forever.

The problem is, she is friends with the other girl I was telling you about. This girl i like is a very devout christian and very conservative. What can I do, sooner or later the bitch will open her mouth, what should i do? I hope she would just drop dead, lol. how should i approach this? This is the first girl i've ever felt so deeply about.
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

Well if you're bisexual, you're attracted to both sexes. It's nothing to be ashamed of, it's the fact and truth. The girl you're with either has to deal with it if she loves you or you can hide it from her. It's up to you.

Don't worry about what those others are saying about you. Every dog has it's day. They have it coming to them.
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

They're not believing you when you say being gay is "just a phase". Hell, I don't even know you, and *I* don't believe you. Because you list yourself as bisexual to the left there, and you're asking for advice on a gay messageboard. If this is a phase, I'd say it's not over yet.

In order to hook up with this very Christian, very conservative girl, you're gonna have to not only "not be gay anymore", but convince her that you never ever did have any gay feelings, and never will again. Best of luck on that one.

Lex
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

kyless85 said:
It's been two years since I've spoken to any of them, but I feel like they don't leave me alone, everytime I walk by them, I feel them looking at me, and talking. I've told them being gay was just a phase, I didn't even do anything with any of them, no kissing or anything, we never went to a gay bar either. I was very dumb back then. So now i've met this wonderful girl, i'm in love with her, and willing to leave everything else behind for her, forever.
Click to expand...

Forever? Wow. That's a long time to commit to at age 52, 42, or 32. Much less 22 and you were "gay" just a year ago.

While you may "love" this girl, you know sometimes love just isn't enough. I also question the stability of a relationship if you aren't going to be honest. It just won't work long term.

Also, be careful making wild assumptions based on a simple Facebook page. There's just as equal of a chance that this person didn't tell your g/f, friend this information too.
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

kyless85 said:
About two years ago I started meeting some of the wrong people in the gay scene, i'm in the closet, but they were not. They were just a few though. I was close to them for about a month, until I realized that being friends with them was gonna out me, they weren't really good persons to begin with. So a year after that, one of my closest friends told me a girl from school, that I don't even know, had told him I was gay, but thet he didn't believe her. I looked for her on facebook and she was friends with the guy that must've told her, one of the guys I had met a year before.

It's been two years since I've spoken to any of them, but I feel like they don't leave me alone, everytime I walk by them, I feel them looking at me, and talking. I've told them being gay was just a phase, I didn't even do anything with any of them, no kissing or anything, we never went to a gay bar either. I was very dumb back then. So now i've met this wonderful girl, i'm in love with her, and willing to leave everything else behind for her, forever.

The problem is, she is friends with the other girl I was telling you about. This girl i like is a very devout christian and very conservative. What can I do, sooner or later the bitch will open her mouth, what should i do? I hope she would just drop dead, lol. how should i approach this? This is the first girl i've ever felt so deeply about.
Click to expand...

Tell Your GF ,She saved you from being Gay. That should work.:rolleyes:
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

Would your prefer that your girlfriend hear the truth from you or from someone else?

There's your answer.
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

Mmm, maybe I should talk to her, but it would be one of the hardest things i've ever done. What if I talk to the source? Would that be better?

And thnx for the advice.
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

Mate,

As you yourself understand a little better today than you did 24 months ago things change. People come and go from our lives and the way we feel and the people we are attaracted to can change.

As a bi guy you have the ability to feel attraction to both sexes... and to fall in love with both too.

Thats sure as hell not wrong... thats who you are and always will be. Its just the way you are wired up, its just another part of you, another element of your character than has made you and shaped you into the great guy that you are.

What would be wrong though is to hide it and be ashamed of it. Its not something you can control anymore than falling in love with this girl.

But she needs to know who shes falling in love with... and what that means for her. All relationships are built on trust and honesty. And this is a part of you that will be very hard to hide as time goes on for any number of reasons...

Yes it will be one of the hardest things that you have ever done... but it will also be one of the bravest and most selfless. Respecting yourself and your friend is the only way that you will build a relationship that will stand the small mindedness of those around you mate... and you deserve that chance of happiness.
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

how should i approach this? This is the first girl i've ever felt so deeply about.
Click to expand...

Tell her the truth. Let her deal with it.
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

kyless85 said:
This girl i like is a very devout christian and very conservative. This is the first girl i've ever felt so deeply about.
Click to expand...
This is the part the stuck out at me as being the most obvious. Why a very devout Christian girl? Do you beat off thinking about her pussy? Or is she just someone that you like and get along with? Are you trying to hide something?
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

Lube said:
This is the part the stuck out at me as being the most obvious. Why a very devout Christian girl? Do you beat off thinking about her pussy?
Click to expand...

Thus My Earlier Quote"Tell Your GF that She Saved You From Being GAY." Those Born Agains Eat that Stuff Up.:didisay::goodevil::goodluck
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

Dude just let sleeping dogs lie She WILL NOT UNDERSTAND IT AT ALL

If you didn't DO anything with any of these people then you have nothing to worry about It would be a he said he said or she said whatever

I mean unless they have a video of you screwing a guy.....Deny everything
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

ejbonk said:
Thus My Earlier Quote"Tell Your GF that She Saved You From Being GAY." Those Born Agains Eat that Stuff Up.:didisay::goodevil::goodluck
Click to expand...
LOL, yeah, well, that would solve the immediate problem... but he's still gay.

RedRedKroovy said:
Dude just let sleeping dogs lie She WILL NOT UNDERSTAND IT AT ALL

If you didn't DO anything with any of these people then you have nothing to worry about It would be a he said he said or she said whatever

I mean unless they have a video of you screwing a guy.....Deny everything
Click to expand...
Oh, c'mon. Do you hear rumors of Walter Cronkite being gay (OMG, he's not gay, is he? LOL)? People spread rumors, but there's gotta be some believability or the rumors die out. We don't know what the OP looks or acts like, but if he's like most gay guys, there'll be some believability there.
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

hey Kyle I stand by what I said

Don't breathe a word of any of this to your gf that is if you want to keep her

Ok now here's the clencher...if you go hanging around these kinda people again then you'll get more of the same

I mean if you want to then gowa head but you really have to make a choice to either hang out at gay bars or date Sister Christian

I mean if you want to switch hit then there are plenty of gf to have out there
 
Re: I really need advice, Can I get a second chanc

Bottom line is, you need to be with someone who loves you UNCONDITIONALLY or reciprocates the feelings you have for them. Make sure this person accepts your bisexuality. Never hide your truth from anyone.

Relationships do have compromising and adjusting, but be honest with yourself, is it worth it? Does she really love you?
 
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