I thank the GAY GOD for finally giving me a NORMAL boyfriend!

[MoufOfKhaos]

Thank you. I was missing my soaps, and now you're here.

 

[refujiunderground]

damn, man. you had some seriously bad luck. @ the guy that turned into a woman while you were dating. damn, man.

 

[HunterM]

You and your current boyfriend only dated for two months? Oh boy...the night is young.

Keep choosing work over him and you'll lose him too.

 

[innocentbychoice]

So, after a decade of dating, I've found someone that (1) I'm absolutely in love with and (2) is FREAKIN' NORMAL!

Let's go down memory lane.

Emotional boyfriend that got upset at everything. I'd ask him what he wanted to eat for dinner. He said he didn't care. I suggested famous daves. He said ok. Then he would not speak with me the rest of the night. Passive aggressive. The following morning he'd get all dramatic on how he had always hated famous daves and all that BS. He also cheated on me, got an std, and tried to blame me for the std. We both got tested and I tested negative while he tested positive. To this day, after months of trying really hard, I still can't think of a single time we spent together that we didn't end up with him getting upset over something.

There was a boy friend that kept demanding I take time off work to be with him. He even gave me a couple ultimatums of either work or him.

Or how about the boyfriend that always wanted to have sex and come in 5 freakin' minutes. To me, sex is something to take our time with, to enjoy each other. Take all night if we want to. All night all day. But for him, he just wanted to come in like 5 minutes and go to sleep.

There was a boy friend that turned into a girl while we were dating. I loved him, so I happily went along with it. And then one day he told me he talked to this other trans and this other trans told him not to date a gay guy like me because us gays will always see them as a guy instead of a girl.

Then there was the boy friend that left me for a girl. I was completely ok with it. Since I cared about him, I wanted him to be happy. A whole 2 months later, he bounced back to me telling me that girl cheated on him with her ex from day one. He only recently found out about it. By this time, though, I had moved on.

All I wanted in life was a boy friend that is stable enough for me to might call him my husband one day. And I've finally found him!

So lovely and warm, an angel of a guy. Completely understanding of how important my business is for me. The other night, I had a client that needed me to do some extra work. He was willing to pay me double my rate to get it done. Called up the boy friend to cancel the date. Afterward, I asked him if he was upset with me, and he said in a sweet voice that he had made it clear with me from day one to always choose work over him. Why? He realized how important my business was for me and speaking in long term planning it's better to have satisfied clients over a simple date. I think it also has something to do with him having a full time job and therefore knows how important it is to stay on top of your job.

We've dated for 2 months and there hasn't been a single sign of fake personality. He is the same person I met 2 months ago. And he tells me I'm the same person he met 2 months ago.

Don't you hate that? Guys who pretend they are something they're not and then become a nightmare a month into the relationship.

We are completely happy with each other. And he's normal! Are normal guys really this hard to find? You know, guys who don't go crazy over little things, guys who make unreasonable demands, guys who are bums, etc. seem to occupy most of the gay population.

I'm gonna be completely honest here:

1. You seem like a really nice guy specially if you were willing to support your ex boyfriend (now ex girlfriend) on her transition.

2. Your current boyfriend is an idiot. Yes, I mean, what sane person would tell ANYBODY they really care about to choose work over them? I don't get it. Well maybe it's because you've only been dating for 2 months and he isn't that attached yet, which brings me to number 3:

3. You've only been dating for 2 months so saying he's Mister Right so early can lead you to disappointment down the road. It's great that you're enjoying it, but remember real relationships take a long time and 2 months isn't anything really.

I hope I didn't sound like a pessimist or anything like that, I was just trying to bring some sense of reality. Hope things work out for you though .

 

[innocentbychoice]

Haha, ya. There was this gay meet group in chicago that I used to go to. Just a place to talk and stuff. Well, one night, he came in and all the heads turned to him. Hottest thing ever walked the face of the earth. You could tell that the other guys started gravitating toward him. Ok, I admit that I was one of those guys.

Turned out he had just gotten back from Afghanistan after 5 or 6 years over there. Eventually, we became really good friends. Then one day I asked him if he wanted to see tron 2. He bluntly asked me "are you asking me out on a date?" I said yes and he said "ok".

We had a great thing going. On the weekends, we'd spend all day naked together in the apartment enjoying each other. Completely carefree.

Then he started experimenting with makeup. Then dresses. Then he started having periods, which meant I got banished to the couch those nights. Then he started getting bothered by me seeing him as a guy. I COULDN'T HELP IT! Then he started talking with this trans mentor of his, which eventually told him it was a bad idea to date a gay dude like me because he would never be a girl in my eyes. So SHE started having more periods and eventually I got banished forever.

That hurt for a long time. I'm not a robot. I couldn't just turn off my feelings like flipping a switch. That goddamn trans mentor... if I ever see her again I will smash her face into the concrete.

Anyway, so that's how I lost the love of my life back then.

Awww this is like the cutest post ever. I think I'm in love with you now lol.

 

[BreakTheIce]

So, after a decade of dating, I've found someone that (1) I'm absolutely in love with and (2) is FREAKIN' NORMAL!

You go gurl!

 

[HunterM]

I'm gonna be completely honest here:
...
2. Your current boyfriend is an idiot. Yes, I mean, what sane person would tell ANYBODY they really care about to choose work over them? I don't get it.

^ You're the idiot!

I'm a sane person. And I keep telling my sugar daddy to choose work over me.

 

[oakpope]

^I don't think it's simply a matter of 'choosing work over the boyfriend'. In my mind, it's to prioritize things together. If the date was a simple thing, without much emotional strings attached, it appears reasonable to chose work over that. If the date was a significant event, an anniversary or similar, and the boyfriend wanted something special with him, I think it would be right to discuss the matter together and find which priority to place in it.
To tell 'I will always place work over you' or 'I will always place a date with you over work' is kind of silly for me. A little bit of communication on a case by case basis seems better to me

PS : usual caveat with my posts, zero experience in relationship = take my thoughts with a grain of salt

 

[innocentbychoice]

^ You're the idiot!

I'm a sane person. And I keep telling my sugar daddy to choose work over me.

Hahaha ok!

 

[mbamike]

Congratulations! I hope you have many years of happiness!

 

[cgymike]

he's dating you... he can't be that normal.

(jk!)

But my question would be: "what the heck is a normal boyfriend?" Each one I have had has had plenty of quirks some intolerable some not. No relationship is a gay analogue of leave it beaver or mayberry...it's just not realistic so I would maintain there is no normal. It's just too hard to define in my experience.

 

[HunterM]

^ So...you're saying normal is boring then.

 

[cgymike]

^ So...you're saying normal is boring then.

No not at all - I just don't know what it is but am open to anyone who could give guidelines for it. I didn't get those from the OP.