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I think I hate cats

The Dog's Diary

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

-------

The Cat's Diary

Day 983 of My Captivity

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ...
 
You think you hate cats?

Interesting. My cat is pretty sure she hates you. :D
 
How can one hate cats? I mean, if they're being annoying, they're like yea big! Pick it up, scold it and gently throw it away.
 
I've always wondered why, in our society, it's socially acceptable to eat a rabbit but not a cat?
 
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People who don't like cats are people who can't be trusted.

They are the sort who always must be in control. And, unless you want to be controlled, it's best to avoid them.

I once told a BF who was fairly new to cats that it's important to "let a cat be a cat".

Once one has learned that lesson, all of life is easier and better.
 
loki81 said:
and specifically, my boyfriend's cat :/

I'm staying at his house today to oversee some contractors while he's at work this afternoon and goddamn this cat is annoying.

I've trained my dog up and down and yet I can't get this fucking cat to stop clawing me every time she lays on me. my arm is not a goddamn scratching post, but cats can't seem to understand cause/effect.

cat scratches me. I scold cat. cat scratches me. I scold cat. cat scratches me a third time, and I pick up the cat and place her on the floor. after the second instance, my dog would have picked up what was going on and stopped scratching me. but this has been going on with this cat for the past 18 hours. #-o

and I think everything I brought with me is now covered in cat hair. I'm going to need to like strip and put everything in vacuum sealed bags so I don't bring all this fucking hair into my apartment when I go back home tonight.
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Don't let it lay on you and don't pick it up. When it scratches, just swat it. That way it knows that it hurts to be scratched. Otherwise it won't know.
 
^So obviously you're not a cat person and it's a good thing you don't have one as a pet.
 
There's a school of thought that holds that "man" has domesticated several species (dog, cow, goat, horse, etc.) but "cat" has only domesticated one, man. :-)
 
Cats are such concieted bitches but fun to play with. I just hate how they think they're the shit.,

Dogs are a lot more fun though.
 
NaughtyArousal said:
I think it's great letting a cat be a cat.

Out of my damn apartment where it's not scratching me, not laying on me when I'm clearly not in the mood, etc.

I can't say that I want to control others, but I'll never let some scumbag animal control me.
Click to expand...

Definitely don't get a pet.
 
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