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  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

i think i love my best friend...

rareboy... i came to this site for advice, not smart ass opinions.

spencer... agreed. ill prolly only get one day with him this summer anyway.
 
so, he made it clear today that he wants to be my first. i doubt he told his bf this but either way, he's jealous of me and thinks hes cheating on him... idk if this is just wishful thinking or not but i dont see a relationship with someone who is constantly jealous lasting. especially if the person in that relationship wants to have sex with someone else
 
so you talked to him and he said he does have feelings for you? and now he's leaving his boyfriend? is that right?

Oh this will be rough...
 
well he's not leaving his bf as far as i know but i really dont see it lasting much longer. and he hasn't said anything about his feelings for me... other than the ones in his pants. but he's not the type of guy who would leave me after that
 
Oh god.

I hope this doesn't go on for months and months.

He's a loser.

And you'd be a loser too if you let this guy be your 'first'.

Run for the hills.
 
pyrobitch said:
well he's not leaving his bf as far as i know but i really dont see it lasting much longer. and he hasn't said anything about his feelings for me... other than the ones in his pants. but he's not the type of guy who would leave me after that
Click to expand...

It's still not clear whether you're interested in this guy because you want a relationship or whether the two of you are just looking for a shag.

Beginnings are important.... just not sure the best start of a new relationship is on top of the corpse of someone else's relationship.
 
rareboy... seriously, lay off

karabulut... i know i want a relationship but at the moment, he wants sex. but it doesn't bother me just bc he cares about me too much to just see me as a sexual object. and i know exactly what u mean bc id feel bad if he left him for me but even if he didn't i think its inevitable that they're gonna break up for other reasons.
 
If the relationship is doomed, then it's doomed. Tell him you're interested, but only once he ditches this guy he's currently seeing. Once he dumps him, fuck him like there's no tomorrow. But keep in mind - you now know your friend doesn't feel that being in a relationship precludes him from looking elsewhere.

Lex
 
well i dont plan on giving it up that easily. he knows that i've had a bad experience with guys who only want one thing so i think he'll be nice enough to ease me into it. but u do make a good point... i just hope that maybe i can keep a better grip on him than his current bf
 
well i mean, no one told me love would be easy. i guess there's always gonna be a little effort required.
 
pyrobitch said:
so, he made it clear today that he wants to be my first.
Click to expand...
pyrobitch said:
its not like im completely ruling him out sexually. im just saying that sex isnt what attracts me to people.
Click to expand...
pyrobitch said:
karabulut... i know i want a relationship but at the moment, he wants sex. but it doesn't bother me just bc he cares about me too much to just see me as a sexual object. and i know exactly what u mean bc id feel bad if he left him for me but even if he didn't i think its inevitable that they're gonna break up for other reasons.
Click to expand...

I'm having a little trouble following this- it's not completely clear what everyone wants here. Or maybe the issue is that not everyone is sure what they want?

The only recommendation that can be made is that you go into this with your eyes wide open.


pyrobitch said:
well i mean, no one told me love would be easy. i guess there's always gonna be a little effort required.
Click to expand...

Relationships are work. They're just not supposed to feel like work.
 
well i know i wanna be with him and he says he wants to be my first but i know that he can wait if he really wants me... that might feel like work for him
 
So....how'd this all work out?

Is this the guy you gave the hand-job in the parking lot after the movie?

Or did he just not think it was worth the wait?
 
pyrobitch said:
i just hope that maybe i can keep a better grip on him than his current bf
Click to expand...

This sounds terrible. In other words, you're saying, "I hope I can hold onto a cheating boyfriend better than the ex he's leaving for me. No one said love would be easy, lolz."

First of all, your situation lacks anything related to love. It's sex. He's not satisfied with his boyfriend and is already cheating on him online with you. He sees you as investment sex one year down the road when you finally move to his location.

Then what?

You get into a relationship? For how long? What guarantee do you have that he won't leave you for someone else just like he's doing to his current boyfriend for you?

Like I said before, this shouldn't even be an issue. This long distance infidelity is rather silly and immature.
 
well i still do love him... platonically though. and ur right, the long distance thing is silly. we kinda lost touch for about a month and a bunch of stuff happened with me so its just hard for him to catch up.
and rareboy, its gettin old...
 
^ Boo! Don't bait, Lex. That was a reply to a response posted 8 days ago. The mods have already had this discussion with everybody. Seriously, you're better than that.
 
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