I Thought I Knew - Book 1 and Book 2

[harry113]

Re: I Thought I Knew

OMG!! Poor Jess!!
Thanks HR
More please
Harry

 

[jaydizzo]

Re: I Thought I Knew

OMG Jess i have no idea what was going thru your mind right then.

But as Kyanimal said since you guys are friends today iwanna know how all this unravels

Once again excellent job HR

 

[muzakified]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Awww...c'mon Jess, don't cry Join in the fun

Can't wait for next week HR...

 

[kcm17480]

Re: I Thought I Knew

I kind of wondered when Jess was going to show up but then It sounded like you had plenty of time.

Wow what a shocker for Jess. It would of been better if he had been told and not a witness. The shock and awe value will deffinitley will do the trick, no doubt about that. Whether he'll want to be friends after that will be up to Jess.

This has turned out to be a great story.

 

[JustForSee]

Re: I Thought I Knew

omg!!! poor jesse, that's bad!!! one thing is hear it, another thing is watch it!

waiting for the next part....

 

[JustJess]

Re: I Thought I Knew

It's been a long time since I wrote last but I think its obvious why I've been so quiet. This last was about the hardest part I've been through in my life. I really have appreciated all the comments from people hoping for a happy ending for me. I was surprised because I had decided most people were just reading it for the sex parts. But I undertand that a lot of guys reading really doi care and that's important to me. I cant really answer each of you. Thanks.

 

[thermodynamics]

Re: I Thought I Knew

The majority of the stories in this part of the forum are stories about guys and relationships. The fact that there's usually some juicy involved is only icing on the cake. I read these stories because the characters have emotions and love for each other. When bad things happen in their lives & relationships or a huge disappointment comes along, I feel sad, just as if it happened to me.

I felt really sorry for you in this last chapter, just as many other people did. As I was reading one of the last chapters, I was really happy when Billy finally admitted that he could see himself with a man. I thought that you and Billy could finally get together. And then I felt the horror & disappointment that you felt when you walked in.

Sure there's some material (OK, lots of material), but I read it mostly for the relationships & love.

I think you could use a few of these......

 

[glorff]

Re: I Thought I Knew

I can tell how good the story telling is by how much of Jess's pain I can feel. I know it gets better, but that does not help much right now.

A lot of us really do come here for the stories and relationships, just take a look at the stories with the most hits and read them. They aren't the ones with the hottest sex. Those don't go on as long.

Jess, there is a lot of love and healing in these stories. I hope the telling of this one will make your life better.

 

[Paulo68]

Re: I Thought I Knew

I agree with Thermodynamics & glorff.
I am hooked on this for the emotional value and the raunch adds to it.
Why is it so good?....cause it's real. I think it is very brave of the boys to tell their story, and HR puts it out there like a pro.

I get the warm fuzzies as Justin & Billy develope their relationship and share their moments (young love).

I feel sad for Jess, it not a good time.
I posted late, the last chapter left me a bit rattled.

Hugs for Jess.

Looking forward to the next chapter.

 

[Hurretje]

Re: I Thought I Knew

A very hot and intriguing story!

 

[Ramrod31]

Re: I Thought I Knew

I love this story! It brought back memories of being in love with my best friend too back in high school and a couple of years afterwards. I'm glad that you are friends as of today, cause for me it ended badly. He wanted to be with me but didn't want anyone to know about it (more like him being bi) and yet he wanted me to be all his while he paraded his "girlfriends". As of today, no one knows about us, only my true love for the past 7 years. It's been over 14 years since we last talk, but he will always have a special place in my life for being my first boy that I tought I loved. Don't regret being with him, just regret losing him since we had so many years of memories before we had our thing. I felt your pain Jess. and I dont know how long ago this was for you, but I believe you will be okay. Can't wait to see how this story progresses.

 

[hardreader]

Re: I Thought I Knew

I talked with Jess yesterday and he said to let everyone know that he has been completely overwhelmed by the comments and encouragement from so many readers. I have to admit that I too was moved by the sincerity and depth of feeling of so many of you, and how often the story has mirrored some parts of your lives.

It also was great to see the incredible number of people who read the project this week, so many apparently for the first time.

I truly appreciate the kind words on how this project has turned out. I knew from the beginning that it was a great story of three wonderful guys and that, if I could do it justice, it really should be told. So I'll take this time to thank all three of them for sharing with me and with you. They are all having some troubles just now. Not because of the story or their relationships. But it has been a hard couple of weeks for all three and I know that your outpouring of support has bolstered their spirits.Thanks so much to all of you who wrote. And, please, keep the comments coming.

 

[hardreader]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Sorry, guys. It looks like there may be some delay today. I tried to do my final edit on JUB and kept losing all the paragraphs. I don't think you want to read it as one long, ubroken string of text. I have asked for help.

I'll try to post later today if I can find the time.

 

[hardreader]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Still no fix in the posting problem. I'll try again tomorrow.

 

[hardreader]

Re: I Thought I Knew

CHAPTER 17
From Jess’ viewpoint​

When I got to Billy’s house, I immediately recognized Justin’s scooter. It looked like he’d hidden it behind a large bush. That kept people from seeing it from the street and even the sidewalk, but it was still in perfect view for anyone walking up to the front door. I was surprised, but not stunned he was there. I certainly figured out that he’d been helping Billy, just as he had helped me. At least he helped me until I convinced myself he was trying to . . . Well, I’ve told you that part before.

Anyway, I knocked. It’s just so ingrained in my upbringing that I couldn’t bring myself to just walk into someone else’s home, even thought that’s what Billy had said to do. I waited a minute and stepped into the entryway. I called out politely, “Is anyone home?”

It was completely silent, empty, deserted, so I headed for Billy’s room. I could hear noises as I approached, but I couldn’t make sense of them. I thought maybe it was a video game they were playing. It sounded sort of like animals – horses maybe – snorting at each other.

Billy’s door was half open. From the hallway, I could see the bed. And Billy. And another person, mostly obscured. But I was sure it was Justin.

My immediate thought was that they were wrestling . . . naked. But before I could even finish processing that thought, I knew. They were fucking. My heart stopped beating. My lungs stopped breathing. It was as if all my life froze in place . . . with me staring at my best friend, the love of my life, fucking the one person I thought was helping us. I was seeing my best friend Billy fucking Justin.

At least that’s what I thought I saw until I realized I could see Billy’s hard cock rising up from his curly pubes. So was Justin fucking Billy? My mind reeled. Was Billy riding Justin’s cock? Was that even possible? I didn’t really know what they were doing exactly. I couldn’t really see that well from where I was standing, but it was clearly physical and very sexual.

My mind was a blur. It couldn’t process what I was seeing and I didn’t want to see anymore. And then I saw that black plastic penis. It looked like the two of them were thrusting it in and out of Justin’s butt.

With that realization came a kind of relief. My mind said, Calm down. It’s OK. They’re not having sex. It’s just a . . . and my mind stopped. I just couldn’t remember the word “dildo” My mind went from going insane over what Billy and Justin were doing to trying to remember what the hell you call those damn things. I guess it was some sort of defense mechanism that kept me from going crazy as I watched the two of them. All covered in sweat. Grunting and laughing. Completely focused on Justin’s asshole.

I have no idea how long I stood there watching, my mind lost to the moment in some crazy word search.

Meanwhile, I could see that all of Billy’s attention was focused on thrusting that black cock into Justin’s all-to-willing asshole. Billy was so busy skewering Justin, he didn’t see me. I was behind Justin and so out of sight to him. As they continued thrusting and groaning and muttering obscenities of encouragement to each other, I stood transfixed in the doorway. Watching in silence and disbelief.

Then I realized Billy was looking right at me. He looked scared and sad, or was it worried. I nodded to him, acknowledging . . . What I was acknowledging? I have no idea. Little pieces from this time are stuck in my mind. Me nodding at Billy. His cum pouring from his raging cock as he beat it mercilessly with one hand and drove that black cock into Justin with the other. I must remember Justin cumming, too, because in my mind I can see cum, lots of cum, flying over Justin’s head to splatter on the floor in front of me. Almost to my feet. Billy can’t shoot his loads that far.

Then I fled. Running from the house. Running from the vision. Running from the reality. Only to pass the night trying to reconstruct everything that had happened from the moment Billy had called me the night before until the moment Justin’s cum splashed on the floor before me and I turned and ran.

As I ran down the hall, I could hear Justin saying, “Billy, was that Jess? . . . Was it?”

If Billy answered, I didn’t hear him.

By morning, I hadn’t slept a moment. I’d spent the whole night reliving, rethinking and rearranging my life and my future. I was too exhausted to go to school and too . . . Words seem to fail me as I try to explain this. I wasn’t angry that morning. At times I was actually hopeful. I could convince myself that this was another of Justin’s lessons. He was teaching Billy things he could do . . . things he could do to please me. If Billy was really gay, wasn’t this the sort of sex we were certain to need to do? I could make sense of it in a way that made me accept their actions as something other than a betrayal of our friendship and our love . . . at least my love. My love for Billy. But then that acceptance would crumble. The tears would flow. And I would start reassembling the pieces all over again.

I needed to know more than I did, more than I had seen. The only way to find out other than to ask Billy . . . which I just couldn’t do . . . was to ask Justin.

That’s how the following evening I ended up knocking on his bedroom door asking for help. As always, Justin was incredibly kind and helpful. He got me some juice and, when he realized I hadn’t eaten in 24 hours, he had his mom fix me a sandwich.

We talked in his room for about an hour. I asked him what had happened and he asked me how much I really wanted to know. I told him I wanted to know everything.

“You may wish you didn’t. Are you sure?”

I told him I was and he agreed to tell me. He started by telling me about how Billy had reacted to our date. About how he saw it completely differently than I did. About how Billy had said he needed to talk to me and tell me we were always going to be best friends, but that he was in love with Justin.

Justin told me how he had brought the dildo . . . now I can think of the word . . . to teach Billy about anal sex. “I thought he was headed in that direction,” Justin said.

“So was it to help him have sex with me,” I asked, momentarily back in my world where everything was really going to turn out OK. Justin looked pained and before he could answer, I said, “I know better. It’s just wishful thinking on my part. I know it’s you he really loves. Not me.”

“I don’t think Billy loves anyone,” Justin said. “I think you are and always will be his best friend. And I thought when I went to his house last night that he and I were going to be serious boyfriends. I hoped he could manage both relationships without anyone getting hurt. That’s why I was there last night.”

I didn’t understand and told him so.

“The whole point of last night was for Billy to tell you that while he and I had never planned it . . . never thought that it would or even could happen . . . he and I had become boyfriends. It started as showing him how to be a better friend to you and just grew into something else. Something neither of us could control. But I wanted to make sure that you knew that I wasn’t trying to break up your friendship with Billy. I know how important it is to both of you. When Billy thought he was straight, he still really wanted to be as close to you as he could. But . . .” He paused.

“But what?” I asked.

“It was something more. I think I love . . . I loved Billy. He didn’t love me, but I loved him. And we were to be boyfriends. And then after what he did to you last night, luring you there so you would see us together . . . “

“Wait, you mean he did that on purpose. He wanted me to see?” Of all the things I had considered, somehow this had never occurred to me. Billy intentionally inviting me to see him having sex with Justin. Of course, the change in time. The door will be unlocked. Let yourself in.

Now I started to make sense of the look I had seen on Billy’s face as I watched him thrust that big black cock up Justin’s ass. “And you were OK with that?” I asked with fury in my voice. It was the first time I had shown Justin my anger.

“No, I didn’t know. He told me you’d be there later. He lied to me, too. I never would have agreed. In his defense, and I’m just going to say this once and never again, he thought it was the best way. That if he, or even we, tried to tell you about us, that you would never have understood. He thought you needed to see us . . . see us like that.”

“He just wanted to hurt me that bad?”

“I can’t defend him. We had a big fight when you ran away. I hadn’t even known you were there. Billy and I are not even talking to each other anymore. We’re certainly not boyfriends and I don’t think we’ll do more than pass each other in the halls for these last months at school. And I’m OK with that. He doesn’t know how to treat people, even people he cares about. And believe me, he cares a lot about you. He just has a very bad way of showing it.”

I started to cry and Justin put his arm around my shoulder. I thought, this is the guy I should have picked for a boyfriend. And I let my head fall to his shoulder and he caressed my hair, stroked my neck.

I don’t know how long we sat like that, but it was a fairly long time. I know my neck was getting tired. I said I needed to go and leaned away from Justin. He looked me in the eyes with his beautiful blue eyes and said, “I’m so sorry. You’re too nice a guy to be treated like that.”

I kissed him. I meant it to be nothing more than a thank you kiss, but . . . it didn’t seem to end. His tongue and my tongue were gently exploring each other’s warm, welcoming mouths. And then his hand was on my crotch, massaging my dick until it started to grow and thicken and warm to his touch.

I returned his caresses only to find him hard as steel, hot as a skillet and jutting from his jeans, which had somehow come open. I was stroking his gigantic cock and in my mind imaging it with red and white stripes like a candy cane or barber’s pole. It felt as smooth and sleek as either. Clear liquid had started to flow from his piss slit. That only made it easier to slide my hand up and down the amazing length.

Justin began to open my jeans and then stopped. “I shouldn’t. I’m taking advantage of you when you’re so upset. You should probably go before we both regret this.”

I hadn’t stopped stroking his raging hard-on. I looked down at it as I said, “You seem to be sending one message, but your dick is sending a different message. I think you want this, too.”

“Oh, I do,” he said and his dick twitched as though to confirm the honesty of what he had just said. “But I shouldn’t. Not tonight.”

I felt rejected again and it surely showed in my face.

“I’m so sorry we started this, because there is nothing I would love to do more tonight than to comfort you and pamper you and caress your wounds until they are healed. But we’ve both had a traumatic 24 hours. I’m sure yours has been much worse than mine. But I don’t trust my own judgment right now. I’m sure you shouldn’t trust yours. Not about something like this.”

“Do you remember when I asked you to cum on me?” I said.

“Sure, that first time we talked at that Arby’s.”

“I still think I’d like you to do that for me. It might tell me a lot I need to understand . . . a lot I need to know about myself. About you. About Billy. Will you?”

“Not tonight, Jess. I just don’t think either of us is thinking straight tonight.”

I left his room not long after that. My hard-on had partially subsided, but my wounds were still wide open. I was still in a lot of emotional pain. I knew more than I had earlier that evening. I think I was smarter and more able to deal with the life I had ahead of me. But I still hurt and I still wanted to cry. I still wanted to be loved.

When I got home and in my own room, I started thinking of all the good times with Billy. Not the sex so much, but the time we spent doing nothing, just enjoying being with each other. But as I conjured each thought, it was interrupted by the image of Billy driving that big black cock into Justin’s waiting ass over and over again as Billy stared blankly at me and I cried.

Finally, my mind turned to Justin and the times we had spent together, particularly tonight. Cuddling with him, stroking his long, powerful cock, feeling his comforting hands on my neck and on my shoulders and on my dick. The images looped and looped and then I realized I was about to cum. I was lying naked on my bed and I arched my back in anticipation. I stroked myself slowly, trying to let the images of Justin linger. Then I came, spraying my cum all over myself as I hadn’t since those early days with Billy. I had wanted someone to cum all over me. And since no one else would, I did it myself.

I raised my head enough to see that I was splattered in cum from nipples to crotch. I could feel its warmth still. See the thick blobs and stringy runs. I certainly had cum all over myself.

But as I lay there thinking about Justin covered in cum on his 18th birthday, I knew that being gay would never make me happy the way Justin had been made happy. I knew that I had a lot of things to figure out in this mixed up life I seemed to have stumbled into. And I knew that everything I had thought I knew was wrong.

--

Sorry for the delay this week. I'm not sure what caused the glitch or how it got fixed, but things seem to be back to normal this morning.

A new chapter's coming next Wednesday. Until then, we look forward to your comments. Keep 'em coming. -- hr

 

[thermodynamics]

Re: I Thought I Knew

So maybe there's some hope for Jess in finding someone to love?

 

[newlink]

Re: I Thought I Knew

whowy... zhowy... that chapter really upset the old "apple cart"! I'm REALLY ENJOYING YOUR STORY HR! And I love that you update every week. "Humpday" has become "I Thought I Knew" time!

 

[muzakified]

Re: I Thought I Knew

HR... great writing! This story is gettin better... I'm glad Jess is begining to get the picture.

 

[harry113]

Re: I Thought I Knew

HR Thankyou, great chapter!!
I feel so sorry for poor Jess, that was a cruel way for him to find out!
And now the guys are apart again because of it!!
Where to now??
Harry

 

[kcm17480]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Damn, everything went to hell in a short time. I would be interesting now as to how Billy feels about the whole thing. His side of the story. It sounds like Jess is starting to doubt his trek into gay life.

Intense chapter indeed. I love this story of yours. Will be wating patiently for next Wednesday.
Ken