I Thought I Knew - Book 1 and Book 2

[JustJess]

Re: I Thought I Knew

In case anyone was wondering, I didn;t out anyone. Thanks to Harrry and others who realize this was as hard for me, or harder, than for Billy.

 

[TheMan4]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Oh, That is good news for u, am i right?

But what about Billy? I want to know!!! Also if u dont want to answer that, then u dont need to answer it.

 

[jaydizzo]

Re: I Thought I Knew

jaydizzo --

You're scaring me a little bit. I hate to think what it is you might learn from me and the way I handle things. My track record isn't so great. If you need a role model, try Jess or Justin or both. They're the ones who have gotten me through so far. I'm afraid I haven't contributed a lot except for anger and confusion. I always seem to have more than enough of both. And sex, too. Sometimes I think that's the only thing I'm really good at.

Being outed can be a bitch of a rollercoaster ride, but those rides almost always come back to the platform in one piece. Good luck to you.

Billy- sorry to scare ya man, but i learn from everyone regardless, what might seem like a bad decision for one is a learning experience for others. I look at all three of you guys a good role models. All three of you guys are great
&

In case anyone was wondering, I didn;t out anyone. Thanks to Harrry and others who realize this was as hard for me, or harder, than for Billy.

Jess- I do realize this was difficult for you too, and as i said for billy I learn form all you guys with this story. you guys are all great peoples and i thank you all for sharing your stories and from differnet perspectives.

& for you too. cant wait for the next chapter. thnks again

 

[hardreader]

Re: I Thought I Knew

What an interesting week it has been:

Billy, it looks like you aren't so keen on being a role model for guys coming out. That may be because you got so queazy riding that emotional roller coaster you like to talk about. But jaydizzo is right, we can all learn from others.

And, Jess, thanks for your comment, but remember the rule about not getting ahead of what's been posted in the project. Not that any of our readers would really suspect you of outing Billy.

Justin, speak up when you can. There's more to life than figuring out how you can pay your bills selling explicit DVDs. Just ask Kyanimal for the rent.

TheMan4, hang on. You're going to learn more tomorrow. But remember that this is real life and so things don't unfold in nice neat little packets. Some questions linger.

Matt18, what a week you've had. If you're not following Matt's story -- A Chance Encounter -- you probably don't realize he came out to his parents this week after his brother snooped in his msn stuff and discovered he was gay. That's his real life, not part of his story. But he's come through it like a trooper and gone on writing a great story. Check it out.

lovinguy1021, good to hear from you and so glad you're enjoying the boys' slog through HS angst. Stay tuned. They're not done yet.

And kcm17480 and harry 113, I know you'll hang in there. There have been no more loyal readers and commenters.

So where are some of our other regular commenters this week? Please, speak up!

More of I Thought I Knew tomorrow!

 

[kniteowl]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Great story I'd been losing track of all the great stories in the forum have to catch up ASAP!!!!

 

[Paulo68]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Come out, come out, where ever you are!
This story, and quite a few posts around JUB show us how conditioned we are to expect that coming out' or being 'outed' will result in a minor catastrophe.
Fear is a powerful motivator, and the fear of disappointing our loved ones and how they'll react underpins this.

It's really a shame to think that in 2008 we fear the loss of family, friends and jobs. Remember if someone is going to have a problem with your sexuality it's their fucking problem. When I sat my parents down for 'the talk' I actually told them this. As most will find, my fear was unfounded.

I was lucky, I came out when I was ready (though my parents already figured it out). Some of us don't get a choice and are outed by friends or family. If this happens, honesty is best. Don't become the Queen of De-Nial.
I think the guys will make great role models, and our community needs more of them.
Coming out is right of passage for us.

I would say that in my experience only about 5-10% of all coming out Storeys end in major drama, and even then time heals most wounds.

You only get one life and it's too short to half live it, which is what your doing if you live in the closet. Being gay or bi might not be a choice but living in or out of the closet is...you choose.

I'm looking at kicking off a short story based on my coming out, and when I came out at work it was to a garage full of motor mechanics. Now that is gonna be an interesting read.

Anyway, I'm off my soap box now and back to reality.
Great chapter HR. Keep the emotion, sex and more sex cummuing in copious quantity.

Oh Jess, I don't believe you would do such a thing.

See you Hotties tomorrow.
Ciao
Paul

 

[hardreader]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Cant wait for the new update. Kind of weird to have my situation replayed here but im cool with it lol.

Sorry, Matt18. Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it in my last post, but it seemed so relevant. Besides, I really wanted to put in a plug for your story and a word of support for what you've been going through. Glad you're cool with it. You've been a great reader. I wouldn't intentionally do anything to hurt or alienate you.

Sorry again, guys. Today's post will be a little later than usual, but it is cumming today.

 

[hardreader]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Chapter 23
From Justin's viewpoint​

Driving Billy home was really stressful. He kept saying he couldn’t come out of the closet. I kept saying what I knew to be the truth: He had to come out. There wasn’t any other way that I could see that we could be boyfriends.

He was getting pretty mad and I was getting frustrated. We ended up sitting in stony silence the last five minutes of the ride. No goodbye kiss. No hug. Just a slammed door and the sight of his back as he headed toward his front door.

I headed back to Mike’s to clean up. I felt sick at my stomach with how things were unfolding. When I had planned this sexy, romantic get-away, I'd thought we'd spend the day finding new ways to get each other off. Catching all the cum-filled excitement on the cameras that Mike had left. What a trip! We would have been to be able to watch porn movies of us fucking and sucking and shooting cum all over each other. It was supposed to be a sex romp starring Billy and me.

Instead, Billy had gone home so torn up about being outed that he couldn't think straight. He couldn't see that being out was inevitable. Being outed might actually make everything easier. This way he didn't even need to tell people. He could just not deny it and everyone would assume it was true. Assume that he was gay.

And once they assumed Billy was gay and they saw the two of us together, they'd figure out pretty quick that we were “friends,” because everyone already knew I was gay. So let them put the puzzle together. Let their dirty little minds run wild about what we did. In and out of bed. The wilder the better for all I cared.

I knew . . . no, I hoped that when Billy calmed down, he would realize things weren't so bad. His folks were probably the biggest problem. Not so much his mom. But from what he'd said about his dad, he might prove to be a real jerk about Billy's being gay. At least about Billy being openly gay. The parent part could be tricky.

As I was starting to clean up Mike's place, I decided I needed to do something to cheer Billy up. To serve as sort of a peace offering when I went back to his house.

Since the video we’d shot with of the two of us having sex hadn’t turned out too well, I decided I’d shoot video of our "love nest," making sure to get close-ups of our cum-stained sheets. The spot where my cum hit the wall above Billy's head. Important stuff like that.

I set up both cameras on tripods, checked their aim and focus, and turned them on. I stepped in front of them and began to stroke my cock, which had already started to swell slightly at the thought of what was about to come. With everything that had happened, my usually willing dick was a little slow to react. But before long, the old feelings were surging through it. I was soon stroking my hard and handy nine-inch cock. It was stretched to its max length and drooling pre-cum for the cameras. One directly in front of me. One to the side. I was stroking my cock for Billy. Once he calmed down about things, he’d appreciate it. I felt sure of that right down to my nuts.

My pre-jizz flowed. My hand felt so warm and smooth as it glided up and down the length of my cock. My other hand tugged at my nuts, making my dick surge even harder. My cockhead flared its reddish-purple helmet. It looked so shiny and smooth and hard. I played with my nuts some more. Turned to show my twitching asshole to the cameras. Its spasms were out of control. I could still feel how Billy’s cock had stretched my asshole. It wanted to be stretched again and my asshole kept tightening and loosening in anticipation of fresh penetration.

I pinched my nipples. Let my hands play across my abs. Tasted my pre-cum and sucked on my fingers, which of course slipped back into my ass, only partially satisfying its need to be invaded. I did everything I could remember seeing a guy do in a solo jack-off video. I wanted this to be the best of all. A favorite on Xtube. A repeat appearance on DudeTube. I was giving it my all. I’d be a star in rrr0854’s Cumshot Clips.


I moved my hips in a thrusting gesture natural. It just came naturally to me. It was the same thrusting I had seen many times as young guys jacked their meat on Xtube. My body felt powerful and completely seductive. At last I could feel the urges building deep down at the root of my cock. My mind seemed a little unfocused about just what was cumming. It was filled with images of having sex with Billy. Particularly the most recent sex with Billy. With my cock shoved up his ass. My hips slowly working it in and out. His hand exploring my cock where it pierced his sphincter. Billy forcing a finger inside himself. Finger fucking himself as I fucked him with my hard cock.

I could remember how it felt when I came deep inside Billy and could feel his finger, or was it fingers, right there with my cock. I could remember how my massive cum had lubed his hole, giving an entirely new sensation to his finger probing next to my slimy cock. Cum dripping out. The hairs on the back of his hand against my pulled up nuts. Feeling my cum oozing down around my cock. Around his . . . Ugh. Fuck! . . . My cock exploded with a blast of cum. With my eyes closed, I didn't even see where it landed.

Almost immediately, I felt my nuts tighten again and that surge deep in my groin, I instinctively bent over my raging hard-on. Staring right into my cock’s lips. Aiming it straight at my face. I let loose one of my better cum shots. I'm lucky I didn't blind myself. It splashed onto my forehead and streaked my cheek, missing my eyes.

The next shot hit my lips. As I started to lick my cum into my hungry mouth, I shot a load straight at the camera in front of me, blinding it, I was sure.

All in all, it was a great show.

I replayed it on the cameras' tiny screens and was pretty pleased with how my first solo porn video had turned out -- both in front of and behind the camera. All those hours of jacking off while watching guys jack off on Xtube had paid off after all.

* * *

As I walked up to Billy's house an hour or so later that morning, I could still feel where Billy’s big cock had been up my ass. It must have permanently stretched me out, I thought, wondering if I would always be able to feel where he had fucked me. I hoped I would.

I wondered if Billy could feel where my cock had been buried in his ass. I’m not sure I could have taken a cock as big as mine the way Billy did. He’d been a pro. He really seemed to like getting fucked.

As I came up the drive to the side door, I could see Billy’s mother through the window cooking something. All I could think of as she opened the door was the day I all but jacked Billy off right in front of her in the very same kitchen. I could hardly believe I'd snaked his beautiful cock out of his pants and stroked it till he was ready to pop. While she had just gone on cooking whatever. What would she have thought if I'd brought Billy off that day. If he'd shot a huge load right there. I could imagine her turning around saying, "Billy, what is that sweet smell?" And I'd be like raising my cum covered hand to my mouth licking up a big glob of Billy's cum, saying "Oh, this is delicious. You should try some, Mrs. . . ."

My reverie was broken as she greeted me warmly at the kitchen door, hugging me tightly and whispering into my ear, “It’s such great news. Billy is so lucky. We're so pleased for him.”

I think I blushed. How much had Billy told her about us? I thought his parents were supposed to be a problem. Did they know we'd spent the night together?

I chose my words cautiously. “I’m so glad it makes you happy. I know that will mean a lot to Billy that you’re so supportive.”

She gave me kind of a puzzled look that told me maybe Billy hadn't told them, or hadn't told them everything.

His mom said I should go up to Billy’s room and congratulate him. She said she didn’t think Billy completely realized the importance of the news yet. I returned her puzzled look with one of my own and headed upstairs. I think we both thought the other knew more than they did, but I wasn't gonna take any chances. I just went upstairs without another word.

I found Billy sitting at his computer furiously tapping away at the keyboard. “What’s the good news,” I asked. “Your mom is all excited about it. I kind of figured she wasn’t talking about us being . . . you know, boyfriends.”

Without turning around Billy started telling me about some of the emails he'd gotten, or that Ted and Jess had been helpful enough to forward to him. None of them suggested a source for the rumor, but it seemed to have started just about the time we had left for dinner the evening before. “So it couldn't have been the waiter,” Billy said.

“Some of them include stuff about both me and Jess being gay. But those are mostly from this morning. If you read them all in order, you can almost see how they start off talking about whether Jess knew I was gay. Then this one seems to say that Jess kept quiet about me being gay. Finally there’s one that says Jess is probably gay, too. There's no mention of Jess and me doing anything like sex together. If Jess started this, it's coming around to bite him in the ass, too."

I listened, trying to make sense of it all. To fit it into what I knew of Jess and Billy's friends and our fucked-up school.

Non of it made much sense and soon I found myself starting to puzzle again over what Billy's mom had said to me about "good news." I was pretty sure it didn't have to do with these emails and text messages. "So what's this news your mom says you got?" I asked.

Without saying a word or even looking away from his computer, Billy picked up a letter and held it over his shoulder for me to take. I took it and read both pages slowly and deliberately. He had been accepted to his first-choice college on the East Coast. One his parents couldn’t even begin to afford. One he had wanted to go to since he first heard about it and its programs. And he’d received a full scholarship. Tuition, housing and books. His name had been submitted for a possible living expenses stipend to cover things like meals, travel and other incidentals. He’d get news on that within 30 days.

“Great news. I knew you could do it,” I said, truly excited for Billy. He didn’t react, so I went up behind his desk chair, bent down and hugged him from behind as best I could. He shrugged me off.

“What the matter?” I asked. “This has got to be great news for you. Aren’t you happy?”

Finally he turned to me and said simply, “Why should I be? It’s just one more thing making a shambles of my life. For the first time in years, I was really happy last night. This morning I wake up to news I’ve been outed, perhaps by someone I really thought was my best bud. Then my boyfriend tells me that getting outed is no big fucking deal. Why? Because he requires, no demands, that I come out no matter what if I want to stay his boyfriend. And then I learn that I’ve been accepted to a school I’ve wanted to go to for years, but it’s so fucking far away I’d never be able to see my boyfriend for months on end. You try to put all of that together in a way that makes life seem so fucking grand.”

I thought about it for a long time before I answered. And then began slowly and carefully.

“You’ve had a lot thrown at you the past 24 hours, but there’s more good there than bad. And I’ll do whatever it takes to make things work out for you so that we stay together, so that you can go to your dream college and so that your folks won’t kick you out of the house. I promise you that. It’s the least a boyfriend can do.”

“So what if I decide I can’t come out?” Billy asked.

“We’ll work through it. You’ve only got another couple of months at our rinky-dink high school. We’ll do whatever we have to. Once you graduate, you can shake free from any of the people who can’t deal with you being my boyfriend. Who can’t deal with us being together. And as for your parents, I can’t answer that one right now. I don’t know enough. But with that scholarship, you aren’t dependent on them. You can make it on your own. You can go to college and live your dream.”

“And while I’m thousands of miles away at college, where will you be?” Billy asked. “It doesn’t do me a lot of good to come out if the only person I want to be with is so far away. I don’t want to be gay. I just want to be with you.”

We talked and talked. Billy was terrified at the thought of coming out. He never thought of himself as being any different than his friends, or the other guys on the swim team. Just a few weeks ago, he was one of those same guys, walking around school saying "faggot" this and "faggot" that.

He admitted that he even called me a faggot more than once. And that he had thought that he'd probably beat the shit out of me to teach me a lesson. He told me cooly that he wouldn’t have thought twice about beating the shit out of any gay guy "just because."

So, Billy said, if he told his friends he was gay, how could he expect them to react any differently than he would have. Not good.

“But they know you. They know what a great guy you are," I argued.

"They'll say they thought they knew me, but they really didn't," Billy said.

"Sure, you may have hated gays,” I said. “It was easy to hate them then. You didn’t know any. It’s a lot harder to hate someone you know and like. Look at you and Jess. I can’t say things won’t change, but it doesn’t have to mean you’ll get the crap beat out of you. Or even that you’ll be an outsider to your old friends. You could win a lot of them over. Open their eyes the way your eyes were opened by Jess.”

“But it was different with me and Jess, because we were both gay. My friends aren’t gay,” he said.

“And neither were you the first time you came to my house. Neither were you.”

The talk went on and on. I felt I was making some headway. Billy was starting to see that there might be a chance that he’d keep some, maybe even most of his friends. Particularly if Jess would come out, too. It might work. At least well enough to get him through to the end of the year and graduation.

What was helping sway Billy more and more was the realization that the more open he was about being gay, the more we could be together. If we had to hide and pretend, we’d have to steal a little time here, a few minutes there. It wouldn’t be good. I thought I knew from what Billy was saying that what he really wanted, if we could make it happen, was to be together with me.

He thought that life at home wouldn’t be too great if his parents found out about him. I told him again he was welcome to live in my room if his parents kicked him out, even though he didn’t expect that they would. His dad, in particular, could make his life hell. But college wasn’t that far away and if he could duck over to my place when the going got tough . . .

Maybe this could work, I thought. Just maybe.

Then Billy knocked the wind right out of me. “I gotta be honest with you,” he said looking a bit sad at what he was about to say. “I really like you. I think I probably really love you. And I never said that to anyone before. But even so, I’m not sure all of this is gonna be worth it if we can’t be together. So I struggle through school and maybe have to move out of my parent’s house and maybe lose most of my friends. And for what? So I can go away to school and dream of being with you. I might as well just stay in the closet and jack off to memories of last night if that’s the way it’s gonna be. Maybe I should just stay straight.”

I looked hard at Billy. My heart was breaking. I didn’t think about what I was going to say. I just said it. “Loving you is not a choice for me. And life without you isn’t a choice I could ever make. I’m sorry I told you I couldn’t be your boyfriend if you didn’t come out. That’s pure bullshit. I couldn’t stop being your boyfriend. I couldn’t stop loving you. I can’t promise you that everything will work out fine. I can’t promise that we’ll be together always and forever Life doesn’t work that way. At least not for guys like us. But we found each other and it’s not going to be that easy for you to get rid of me.”

Billy turned to me and hugged me hard. I thought he was going to cry, but he didn’t. And somehow I managed not to cry either. We just stood there locked in each other’s arms, holding on to one another for dear life.

And in a muffled voice I finally heard Billy say, “I love you, too. I do.”

--

Thanks for continuing to follow this project week after week. There aren't that many chapters left to go. Let me know what you think. Your comments are always encouraged and welcomed. I Thought I Knew will continue with a two-part chapter next Wednesday and Thursday.

 

[kcm17480]

Re: I Thought I Knew

It's really sad that this story will come to an end, but as they say all good things do come to an end. It would be nice if we could have an update on how the trio are doing.

 

[Paulo68]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Instead, Billy had gone home so torn up about being outed that he couldn't think straight..[/B]

Billy, look how far you've come, can't even think straight.

Great chapter, did the Justin's video cheer Billy up?
The deep & meaningful at the end had the me tearing up.
Well done guys. Can't wait to see what goes down when Jess gets there.
Ciao.
Paul

 

[TheMan4]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Aww...I'm not being outed yet...but only 1 of my friend know which he is gay too, so he supports me all way!! Anyways my parents and my big bro know too. My big bro don't care if im bi or gay or whatever, he just want me to be happy. Which is good news for me . But my parents, different story like u, Billy, my parents doesnt take well that im gay. But sometimes if u tell ur closest friends or closet family members, it can be good news. I will be there for u, all, all time if u need me

Good Chapter though!
Im sad that this story will be over soon...
Looking forward to next Wednesday and Thursday!!

 

[jaydizzo]

Re: I Thought I Knew

I cant believe theres only a few chapters to go. Another excellent chapter, good job Justin with helping Billy come to terms i am anxious to find out what course of action is taken. Now both of you go help out Jess.

But I would like to know what else is going on thru Jess' head at this time, As he stated in his post above I'm sure this is hittin him hard as $hit seeing as he has no one to really talk to except for billy and Justin. I would like to see Jess' take on the situation, but I'm sure this is sure to come tho

HR, Jess, Billy, and Justin until next week you guys take it easy.

This is truly one of the things I cant wait to see every wednesday

 

[Paulo68]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Priceless....... a moment in time.

Great chapter, just had to post agian.
Paulo

 

[harry113]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Thanks, sensitive chapter!
Poor Billy, he is so mixed up, & poor Justin, he doesn't know which way things will go!
And poor Jess, who is out of all this & yet part of it all.
Look forward to next weeks chapters to see how things went
Harry

 

[justinjeans]

Re: I Thought I Knew

hr -- i think u got that chptr perfect, but it's the nxt chptr i want 2 see.
talk to u soon.

 

[TheMan4]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Hmmmm....What could Justin talk about??? something that is very excited???? Cant wait!!!!

 

[justinjeans]

Re: I Thought I Knew

hr -- its wed. wheres the next chptr?

 

[hardreader]

Re: I Thought I Knew

A number of you, including Matt18, kcm14480, TheMan4 and JayDizzo expressed sadness that this story is winding down. Chapter 29 will be the last. So make your plans. As for Paul, I am so glad you shared your feelings with all of us. Justin is a master with words and quite the charmer. But right now, Justin seems anxious for this next chapter to be posted, so I won't wait any longer.

Chapter 24 -- Part I
From Jess’ viewpoint​

I’d spent most of the day e-mailing, texting and talking to friends and teammates trying to figure out where and how this rumor outing Billy got started. It was so frustrating. No one seemed to know where it had come from.

Ted, who was the first to tell me about the rumor, had said he thought it started with Kate. But when he tried to remember what he’d heard and from whom, as best he could remember it was a guy on the swim team named Terry who had first mentioned it. Ted thought Terry had said something like, “I can’t believe what I heard about Billy. I don’t think he’s like that. Did you hear anything?”

Ted didn’t think Terry ever said the word “gay,” because he remembered not knowing what the hell Terry was talking about. But before Ted could ask him, Terry was moving off to talk to some girl who had just come in. Terry seemed anxious to talk to her and Ted didn’t think anything more about it until much later.

By the time I headed over to Justin’s to meet Justin and Billy, I didn’t know much more about how the rumor got started than I had that morning. Fragments and half-remembered comments were twisting and turning in my head.

Billy and Justin were talking in Justin’s room with the door ajar when I got there. It struck me as I approached that the three of us were never together, except for that one brief, painful time at Billy’s. I guess I was relieved to find they weren’t fucking. Or sucking. Or even jacking off. I didn’t need any more surprises.

I came in and sat down. They both looked at me for a minute without saying a word. Then Justin said something like, “Hi, man. How ya hanging?” Billy just looked at me, kind of like he was mad. Or didn’t trust me. Or maybe both.

“Kind of a tough day,” I said to Justin. Then I looked over at Billy and nodded. He nodded back. “And you guys?” I asked.

“Got off to a great start. I mean a great fucking start. Literally,” Justin said with a big grin on his face. Billy kicked Justin’s leg, not even trying to be subtle or anything. Letting Justin know to shut up.

“It’s OK. I had a pretty good idea what you guys were going to be up to. Billy talks,” I said, with a wink to Justin. Then looking at Billy I said, “Sorry I had to bring you a downer on your weekend . . . you know, your special weekend.”

“We know, Jess,” Billy said and I could feel anger in his voice. Was he mad at me? “So who started the fucking rumor? Was it you Jess? You’re the only one who knew.”

His words were so harsh that I leaned back as though he’d attacked me physically. He certainly didn’t waste time laying his cards on the table. His words hurt. Really hurt. I’d put up with a lot of shit from him recently and I was trying my damned best to be his best friend, even when he didn’t seem to be trying to be mine. I didn’t deserve this.

I got up and took a step toward him. I wasn’t going to let him intimidate me. “Why would I out you?” I said jabbing a finger into his chest. “It would only draw suspicion back on me. Which is exactly what’s happened. Because you’re out fucking around with Justin, I get brought into this whole thing and now people are asking questions about me. Do you think it makes any sense for it to be me who outed you? Just think about it Billy. And thanks for the vote of confidence in your so-called ‘best bud,’ you fucker.”

I was pissed. And hurt. I was considering leaving. But Justin, always the one with the right words at the right time, started talking slowly, thoughtfully, calmly. “Billy, you don’t mean that. You may feel betrayed . . . by someone . . . but you know Jess would never do that. You know Jess better than . . .”

Justin kept talking in that calm reasoned voice. Sometimes to Billy. Sometimes to me. He sounded so reassuring. He talked to Billy straight up about how he had to understand that I was jealous of their relationship, about the long friendship between Billy and me, and about the psychological abuse Billy had put me through. As Justin kept talking, I could see the tension and anger ease out of Billy until he was sitting slumped, deflated on Justin’s bed.

I was amazed at how much Justin knew about the two of us. Billy must tell him everything. Everything we said and did. And now Justin was weaving it into a single explanation of why it made no sense to suspect me. If I had wanted to hurt Billy . . . if I had wanted to out Billy, I would have done it after walking in on the two of them in Billy’s room. That was the time I was really hurt, seeing the two of them going at it like dogs in heat. Not now.

I nodded in agreement and thanked Justin. He stepped toward me and pulled me into a bear hug, which I really needed just then. I felt so warm and safe in his arms. This was the side of Justin that really made me jealous. It wasn’t the fucking and the sucking. It was that Justin cared so damn much about other people. Helping other people. I didn’t want our hug to end.

Finally, Billy stood up. I caught his movement from the corner of my eye and it caused me to break away from Justin’s hug. I didn’t know what Billy might be going to do. I have to admit that for the first time I feared he might hit me.

But he didn’t. He held out his hand to me and said simply, “I’m sorry.”

It was my turn to hug him. Not as warm and welcoming a hug as Justin had just given me. I wasn’t emotionally ready for that. Forgive and forget was a nice idea. At that moment I thought I could forgive, but I knew I couldn’t forget. So I gave Billy a hug that said let’s try to put this behind us. Let’s try to be friends again.

“It’s going to be OK,” I told Billy as he finally pulled away from me. “I’ve talked to a lot of the guys and almost all of them say they don’t care if you’re gay or straight. Of course, they asked me if it was true. I told them to ask you if they had any questions. Ted even said he would have picked me as gay before you, if that makes you feel any better.”

“He did?” Billy said, his mood lifting a bit. “Did he ask if you were?”

“Nobody asked me,” I told him. “They acted . . . sounded like they really didn’t care one way or the other. They were curious about what was going on, that’s all.”

As we talked about the reaction among our friends, my cell phone rang. It was Ted. He asked how Billy was doing and I brought him up to speed. Then he asked to speak to Billy.

While Billy and Ted talked, Justin and I talked to each other. Nothing special. Just filling each other in.

When Billy hung up, he said, “Ted’s gonna invite all the guys over to his house after school tomorrow so I can talk to them.”

Justin and I looked at each other in surprise and disbelief. “What are you gonna say?” Justin asked.

“I guess I’m gonna say I’m gay.”

Justin and I were completely stunned. We started to pepper him with questions. Why? What made him decide to do that? Was he sure?

It turned out that in talking to Ted, Ted had asked Billy straight up if he was he gay. Billy said he was sort of surprised by the bluntness of the question and even more surprised by his own answer. It had just come out spontaneously. He had told Ted he was. And Ted had said simply, “That’s great. Have you met someone, someone special?”

Billy had told him yes, he’d met someone. He hadn’t said who. Again Ted had just said sincerely, “That’s great.” The exchange had put Billy at ease. He’d said he was gay. He’d said it out loud to someone. And the world hadn’t collapse. It didn’t even shake. And Billy felt so much better telling the truth.

It was his turning point. And now he didn’t want to turn back, even though it surprised him how quickly it all had happened.

Then he looked at me and asked. “Are you gonna join me?”

I blushed. It sort of felt like he’d asked me to marry him or something. It was so personal and yet so open. I couldn’t answer him. I just shrugged and then said, “Let me think about it.”

“Sure, think about it,” Billy said. “I think it would be great for both of us.” And then he looked at Justin and stepped over and put his arm around him and added, “For all three of us.”

Suddenly I knew my answer.

“Billy, when you come out to the guys, you’re going to open up a whole new life for yourself. A life with Justin. A life where you don’t have to lie and you don’t have to hide. It’s not like that for me.”

I explained to Billy and Justin that if I came out, I would have no life. Did they really think I was going to find a boyfriend with just a couple of months of school left? No. And no matter how much our friends might accept me being gay, there would be others who wouldn’t and who could make life hard for me. Even if they never said anything to my face, I knew they’d be talking. Of course, I knew they’d be talking about Billy behind his back, too. But Billy wouldn’t be alone. I would.

And there were my parents. They’d be far worse than Billy’s. I didn’t think there’d be a place for me at Justin’s, even if he offered. I told Billy I would support him in every way, but that I couldn’t come out. Not now. I wasn’t ready. My life wasn’t ready.

“I’ll stand by your side and support you whenever and wherever you need me. But I can’t come out. Not now,” I said.

I thought Billy was gonna be angry with me again. Angry for not supporting him. After all, I was the guy who got him into this. I was responsible for the whole thing. He never would have even met up with Justin if it weren’t for me. If I weren’t gay . . . It really was my fault in a way and now I was going to leave Billy to come out by himself. He had every right to be angry with me.

But he wasn’t. He said he understood completely. He told me how earlier that morning he and Justin had fought because Justin wanted Billy to come out. Told Billy he had to. Billy had said no. He wasn’t ready.

“Things seem to be changing really fast around here,” Billy said. “But I remember how I felt this morning. I just thought I couldn’t come out. I know how that felt and I know how it felt when Justin said I had to. I’m not going to try to tell you what you have to do. Only you know that.”

I was so relieved. And for the first time in weeks, I felt Billy and I really were best friends again. Despite all the crap going on, we were still best friends. I told him to “get his ass over here” and then gave him a hug. A hug as warm and welcoming as Justin and I had shared. A hug that said more than I could put into words. And Billy hugged me back.

The conversation meandered about for a while until we got talking about how each of us came to our first real certainty that we were gay. We’d each gone through the worrying and fretting and wondering. But what we were talking about that afternoon was that moment when the curtain rose and gay life began.

I had just finished telling them that I didn’t think I’d ever had such a moment. Not a moment like Justin with the twins.

I’d never doubted that Justin would say that his gay life began on his 18th birthday with the twins. But he said that moment had been eclipsed. Last night. When Billy had made love to him that first time. He felt not only was he gay, but that he was fulfilled. For the first time, being gay made sense, made him happy, made him who he was with Billy. It was being gay on a whole new level, he said.

Billy agreed. Last night for him had been that same kind of moment. But Billy being Billy started talking about it in the most graphic way. How it had felt as Justin’s hard, slick cock had pushed firmly but gently against his ass until it slid in. How Justin had masterfully pumped those amazing nine inches of hard cock in and out of Billy’s ass. How . . .

As Billy talked on in great detail, we had all started groping ourselves, adjusting our hardening cocks. There were a lot of glances from one crotch to the other as we all got harder and harder. Finally, Justin had opened his jeans and whipped out his nine inches and was unashamedly stroking it as Billy talked on. Billy was next and soon I followed suit.

Before Billy got to the part in his story where either of them came, we were all three sitting there with our hard cocks in our hands, stroking our meat, listening to Billy’s story . . . Billy and Justin’s life.

“I think that’s about enough of that, Billy,” Justin finally said, cutting the story short just before Billy got into how the cum started flying. “I don’t think Jess needs to hear every detail.”

Suddenly, we were all silent. With no one talking, we all looked sort of awkwardly from one to the other. Without Billy and his graphic sex talk, it seemed kind of strange for the three of us to be sitting there. Each with his hard cock in his hand. Beating off.

Finally Justin said to me, “So what’s your greatest fantasy . . . sex fantasy? What would you like to do more than anything else?”

I didn’t have to hesitate. “I’ve told you both that I want one or both of you guys to cum all over me. I want to be showered in your cum.”

“That’s cool,” Justin said and gave me a grin laced with so much lust that I had to stop stroking my cock for fear I might cum just from the way he was looking at me. I noticed that while I might have stopped cranking my cock, Justin hadn’t stopped running his hand up and down his mammoth hard-on. His other hand played with his balls.

“And what about you, Billy? What’s your No. 1 sex fantasy? And it better include me,” Justin said.

“I don’t know if it’s possible or not, but I want us to both fuck each other in the ass at the same time. I’ve seen videos where guys can fuck themselves with their own cocks, so I figure there’s got to be a way to do it. Can you imagine shooting a big load up each other’s asses at the same time? Our dicks up each other’s butts. Tongues down each other’s throats. It would be fucking unreal. God, I want to do it.”

The heat in the room was climbing fast. While Billy was telling his fantasy, I was sweating. I had to strip my shirt off. I was running one hand across my pecs and teasing my raging hard-on with the other. I was so turned on hearing Billy talk and watching these two guys. So cool as they worked their cocks, played with their nuts, flaunted their sexy bodies. I was truly ready to bust a nut.

“So what about you?” Billy asked Justin with a knowing smirk.

“I want to have the two of us,” he said looking right back at Billy, “fuck a guy at the same time. I dream about how it would feel to have both of our cocks buried in a tight asshole. Feel them rubbing against each other. The friction. The heat. The smell of guys doing it. And then when one of us started to cum, it would trigger the other and we’d be sloshing our cocks in and out of that tight, creamed ass . . .” His voice just sort of tailed off as the image overcame him.

“Anybody’s ass in particular?” Billy asked. It was obvious he knew the answer.

As I looked over to Justin for his reply, I thought it looked like he was blushing. I’d never seen him blush. “Yeah, anyone in particular?” I asked Justin.

He paused for a moment. He looked hard at Billy. And then hard at me. I thought he was trying to decide whether to answer or not. Then, staring right at me, he said in a quiet voice, the kind of voice that made what Justin said so special, “You. With you. I’ve had this dream of Billy and me both fucking you.”

Now I was blushing. “No way,” I said before I could even think. “No way.”

“I know,” Justin said. “But that’s the truth. I’m not sure I really even want to do it. But I do dream about it. It’s my special fantasy. I mean, let’s face it Jess, you have got one of the hottest asses of any guy I ever saw. Who wouldn’t want to do something spectacular with it if they had the chance.”

I don’t know what possessed me, but I stood up and turned my ass toward Justin. Bent over. Pulled my ass cheeks apart. And flexed my sphincter, trying to give him a third-eye wink. “So how do you like it?” I said, using my favorite quip. Humor to cover my nervousness.

“I like,” Justin said as he got to his feet. He was squeezing his nine-inch hard-on tight at the base, making it swell more than I had ever seen. It was bulging red. Veins popping out. Obscenely huge. I was entranced by it.

I was still bent over, my ass cheeks spread. Justin stepped up behind me. I could see the clear ooze flowing down his cockhead. Running down to his tight fist at the base of his incredibly long shaft. “Don’t you dare,” I said quietly but firmly.

“Just let me touch it,” he said. Before I could respond, I felt the underside of his hard, hot cock rub against my ass lips. It’s warmth and hardness and the reality that it was Justin’s cock pressing against my sphincter send tremors through my entire body. It felt like lightning bolts where exploding in my brain.

I gasped and every muscle in my butt twitched and contracted. “You like that,” Justin said in his reassuring voice and then he started humping my ass. I could clearly feel the hard ridge of his cockhead as it grazed across my sphincter. His pre-cum lubed my ass. I didn’t pull away. It was a sensation I had never experienced. And he was right. I did like it.

Justin was holding my hips in his hands, getting a good rhythm going with his cock in my crack. I was responding with a gentle pressure back and a little hip motion of my own.

Justin let out a little groan. I was pretty sure he was getting close. I straightened up a bit, bringing my face next to Justin’s. He started probing my ear with his tongue while continuing to hump my ass. And both of us were moaning in pleasure.

“What about me?” Billy said plaintively in a voice too loud for the moment.

Justin stopped and pulled away. But that didn’t matter. I had heard Billy’s words. I could hear how left out he felt. I wasn’t mad at Billy anymore, but I have to say that to hear him say those words – “What about me?” -- made me feel even better than when he’d said he was sorry.

There were all kinds of ways for the three of us to interact. Billy had just felt what it was like when one guy got left out completely. I didn’t want the two of them to fuck me, or even one of them. Well, maybe . . .

“I’ve got an idea. Let’s hit the hot tub. We could all stand to relax a bit.” Justin’s words interrupted my thoughts.

I didn’t even know there was a hot tub at Justin’s house and apparently Billy didn’t either. Justin said it was in a screened porch area at the back of the house, shielded from prying eyes. His parents were going to be out for hours and so he told us to leave our clothes in his room, grab a towel and follow him.

So the three of us, buck naked and with our hard-ons jutting out in front of us, headed for the hot tub.

Justin led the way, followed by Billy and then me. My cock was so hard right then that it felt like the entire center part of my body, every muscle from my nips to my knees, was straining just to keep my enormous cock jutting straight up and out. It felt great. Powerful. Unstoppable.

My cock was so sensitive. I could feel the air moving past it as I walked. I felt that with a cock this hard, this big, this much desired by Justin and Billy, too, I could rule the world.

What a night. We were three horny teens heading off for a new adventure.

Continued tomorrow . . .

--

As always, your feedback and comments are requested and appreciated. So speak up!

 

[harry113]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Wow!!! Hot & Steamy!!!
Thanks HR, looking forward to tomorrow's instalment.
Harry

 

[Paulo68]

Re: I Thought I Knew

Im lovin' it!

The Three Musketeers.....Swords at the ready, off for adventure.
Good to see the Boys getting along at last.
Cheers
Paul