I totally fell in love with my fuck buddy. Want to marry him :(

[fallinlove]

Thanks for your responses, but as I'm reading what you all write I'm beginning to realize that there's no hope between me and the guy. I see that these things have happened to all of you and i'm just another "statistic"

The thing that's so odd about our 'relationship', is that we had a discussion towards the beginning saying that we officially "like" each other, and that what we have is more than just sex (but not an actual relationship). I mean, how many fuck buddies have such a discussion?

 

[Rolyo85]

Many... I had it with my guy. It's basically being friends with benefits. You're not strangers to each other, you're just friends who have sex. It's more than simply sex, but it's not a relationship.

 

[fallinlove]

There's no update yet.... I still havent had the conversation with him. It didnt work out in the last two weeks.
I still need to discuss everything with him. I'm beginning to realize there's no hope in this (non-existant) relationship or ours. I seriously never felt this mentally and emotionally down over somebody ever. I barely eat and I like food And I've had boyfriends in the past and been through shit plenty of times.

AHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[fallinlove]

BIG UPDATE


So a month has passed since my original post and I finally had the courage to speak to him.

The discussion was one of the most shocking, revealing conversations I have ever had in my life with someone. All this time I thought this guy has no interest in me and just wants to get rid of me already...

When I started the conversation, he told me that he was pushing away because he thought the I was the one who was showing no interest. He claims that I did not treat the relationship like a "dating" relationship and that I didnt introduce him properly to his friends, and that I did not call him frequently enough to say hello etc... All this time, I blamed him for all of these things.

It's just so weird - I had no idea he had feelings for me. I was completely shocked, I didn't even know where to steer the conversation. He said at one point he really wanted to have a relationship with me. He actually liked me!??????

After these few months, he says he really doesnt know where we stand because we put all these barriers in front of us and had some sort of misunderstanding about our relationship.

We are still talking and meeting one another and we like each other.

I really like the guy and have feelings for him. He's really special. I hope this opens a new door for us. We'll see what happens. I'm happy we spoke

 

[Rolyo85]

Congrats! I'm happy it seems to be working out.

HOWEVER!


This should be a HUGE red flag and a lesson to both of you. Miscommunication, barriers and silent assumptions are an anathema to any relationship. You communicate and you tell each other everything that could create a rift between you, or you WILL fail.

 

[Ninja108]

the number one thing to a successful relationship in my mind...isn't mind blowing sex (it helps though) or thoughtful gifts etc.
It's communication,always has been,always will be.

 

[hotatlboi]

wow, pretty rare that you confess your love for someone and they feel the same way.

Hope it works out for you!

 

[fallinlove]

He didnt exactly confess his love. But he thought of me as a potential partner and did want something more.

I'm not entirely sure where we are now. We have to hammer out a few things (not each other's asses!) and see what steps to take now. But I think the open communication and the talk will change things from here on. Whichever way it goes, I really needed this conversation with him.

I hope for the best.

Still in shock though. Always expect the unexpected.