Back in my youth, I had never heard the term "Gay" as it wasn't used in the context it is today. My folks would talk about someone almost whispering that they were "queer", which I was not sure what that was all about. I never heard of guys sucking each others dicks before. I considered myself totally straight although I was quick to get aroused when I saw other guys naked as well as pictures of naked women. In my college dorm we had communal showers and there was always male nudity around which took me awhile to get used to it, although I found myself really liking it. It still never sank in that I had gay tendencies as I was never exposed to it or knew anything about it. I did have a horrible crush on one of my roommates though and it was driving me crazy. I always tried to find ways to see him naked, but he was pretty much a prude and that almost never happened which drove me crazy. After college I was in a great business career and had obtained my private pilots license and had my own airplane. I hung out at the airport if I was not working. I wasn't dating anyone at the time so I spent a lot of time with other pilots at the airport and we did a lot of flying and socializing together. My apartment was a great place to hang out and drink beer also when we left the airport. There was a young line boy there working on his license and fueling planes to earn money for his rating. He and one of his college friends - we will call the college friend Norm would stop at the apartment once in awhile and we would go swimming at our inside pool there. Many times there were a group of us there for a swim, and then back to the apartment for beer. We would change after swimming in the pool changing room and it was a great display of some hot cocks. I always enjoyed that opportunity to look. One night we were leaving the airport and the line boy had to go somewhere else, but Norm asked if he could come by for a swim and a beer. I was 24 and he was 21 and one of the hottest guys you would ever want to meet. I said sure, but it was just the two of us and he was all for it. We changed in the pool changing room where I got a glance at his beautiful body and cock, but I acted totally normal as we went off to swim. Afterwards we changed into our sweatshirts and pants with no underwear for the trip back through the cold from the pool to my apartment. It was not unusual for the group at times to pimp each other about things and even do a little grab assing or wrestling just being stupid. I was in the kitchen getting the third round of beers and Norm tackled me from behind bringing me down to the floor. He caught me totally off guard. So I was game and wrestled around. He caught me in a leg lock and I could feel his cock was hard. I had a raging hard on as well as was trying to hide it, which is hard to do in sweatpants without underwear. He finally said, looks like you really made me hard. I said, I guess we both got a little frisky with the wrestling letting it go at that. He asked what were we going to do about it. I was nervous as hell and trembling I think and muttered I didn't know. At that point he said he thought we needed to get a release. He slid my sweats down and went down on my rock hard cock. I was in shock. I had never thought about really doing something like that although I had always wondered what it would be like. It felt incredible and I was frozen in place. I thought that if I was ever going to try this, now might be the one and only time in my life I might be able to without total embarrassment since he was doing it to me so I did the same to him. He had an incredible cock attached to the hottest body, and I was trembling all over. Here I was doing something I thought was so taboo, wrestling with guilt and wrestling with the greatest sensation I had ever had in my life, my mind was on overload. I gave him a bucket of cum in his mouth and he swallowed it. Shortly thereafter he gave me the same in my mouth. I held it in my mouth savoring the taste and thinking I had part of him in me and he has part of me in him. I quickly came to the conclusion that if he swallowed mine, I would swallow his and I did. We laid on the floor exhausted for a few moments not knowing what to say with each others dicks still in our hands. Then Norm hopped up and said he thought he needed a beer. I was greatly relieved as I was not sure what to say or how to say it. He acted as nothing strange had happened. We shot the shit for a few more minutes then he had to leave. He asked if he could come by again a couple of days later as he had a date with this cute chick the next night. I said sure, anytime. We became good friends, very close, obviously, but it was purely sex. He would stop by every so often when he knew he would be the only one there and we would experiment more. He taught me how to fuck him which I never thought anything like that was possible. Wow, was that ever great. Were were 69'ing one night and he spit in his hand, rubbed it on my cock and sat on my cock. Again, I was in shock. I pulled out a few moments later and shot a load all over him so much he had to take a shower after we were done. He said he and his cousin used to experiment that way and learned how to fuck each other. Norm was one gorgeous guy and I was pretty hot back then too at that young age. I think we both thought we were just two horny boys at that time in our lives and it would pass when we got serious about girls. There was never any kissing going on or any relationship other than sex or best friends. I wasn't sure what to think or expect and it kind of messed me up a little. We kind of went our separate ways with our mutual friends not really knowing anything about the sex. Both of us got married and raised children. I never saw him much after that. The one thing I realized though, was the drive for dick doesn't go away, it only gets stronger and I have struggled with it my entire life. I have had many a married fuck buddy over the years without anyone being the wiser, and I think it has helped my sanity for getting through this life. If it were not for that, I think I would have gone crazy and ruined a perfectly wonderful family life. There are so many of us out there where our wires are crossed for some reason. We did not chose to be this way, but we are. The question is how do we cope with it. I am not sure my way was the best, but it has helped me greatly over the years. I have shared intimacy with some of my best friends over my lifetime as well as my wife. Good luck with your endeavors guys. I know how you feel.
