The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    To register, turn off your VPN; you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • Hi Guest - Did you know?
    Hot Topics is a Safe for Work (SFW) forum.

If you're being bullied or suicidal please read.....

I'd add to what he said, "To you adults whose attitudes tell kids bullying is fine -- stuff it back somewhere hidden, because it's evil. To you adults who encourage the beliefs and attitudes that make kids think bullying is okay -- stop. Stop being evil, stop sponsoring hatred, stop sponsoring this wickedness.
"God did not make our children to die before they really lived. If you're not part of the solution, you are part of the problem, and no matter what religion you are, God -- does -- not -- approve. If you convey to your children that gays or others who are different belong in or are headed for hell, I tell you that you are far closer than they are. If you cannot love others as you would like to be loved or as you love yourself, if you cannot love other people and their children as you want your children to be loved, I just have one thing to say: get out of the way, grow up, and learn to love."
 
Bullying in school should be treated the same way as assault. Bullying which involves actual hitting should be considered to be assault and battery.

Penalties for children are usually less than penalties for similar adult crimes...but sometimes recalcitrant teens are tried as adults. If the message gets out to teens that they may be sent to "juvie" if they keep this stuff up, maybe-just-maybe a lot of it would stop.
 
I appreciate the responses, as someone who has and is struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts this resonates in every part of my soul. While I maybe within the minority here this total outcry of support and sharing of sources has actually worsened my depression and suicidal thoughts. Sometimes I get the feeling that being suicide is trendy and that everyone goes though it. I guess I'm still harboring some resentment toward the it gets better campaign. A magic fairy doesn't just pop out of the sky and make it better, it is a fight for your very life. I struggle every day and for someone to tell me it will just get better is a fucking joke.
 
getserviced10 said:
I appreciate the responses, as someone who has and is struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts this resonates in every part of my soul. While I maybe within the minority here this total outcry of support and sharing of sources has actually worsened my depression and suicidal thoughts. Sometimes I get the feeling that being suicide is trendy and that everyone goes though it. I guess I'm still harboring some resentment toward the it gets better campaign. A magic fairy doesn't just pop out of the sky and make it better, it is a fight for your very life. I struggle every day and for someone to tell me it will just get better is a fucking joke.
Click to expand...

(*8*)

I know the "struggle every day" trip. For long stretches I was certain that if I were gone, intelligent beings on the far side of the galaxy would sudden;y wonder why life was brighter. For longer stretches I just wanted things to stop.

The first is silly, the second unworkable.

And that was before I realized my own identity -- so I can't begin to imagine the horror of dealing with that at a much younger age.


That and what I bolded is why I criticized the "it gets better" bit. My inclination was to ask, even in my current situation, "When?"

My message is different: There's another world. You maybe can't see it from where you are, but it's there. You may get glimpses from afar, and wonder if it's just a mirage -- 'fear not'; it's there. You may be in a world where you see no way out, but that doesn't negate the truth that there is another world.
All you have to do is hang on. How long? I don't know; for me it was longer than it should have been, by decades. For you, I can't predict, but I'll say to be ready for a long haul. How hard will it be? Again, I don't know; the only one who can really measure that is you, but when you're in misery no objective assessment is possible.
But I can tell you one thing about that: you can make it. You are good enough, and tough enough, to make it.
And I can tell you one thing about that, too: there are a lot of us here in that other world who have been through our own hells to get here. We're rooting for you, even if we haven't met you. And we aren't planning on surrendering this world to the haters and bigots and primitive minds that think they know it all when in fact their heads only have room for their narrow view of the universe. We're here, and we aren't going anywhere, and we're waiting for you. When you make it out of your world into the real world, we'll be here, and we'll welcome you.

(to borrow an old phrase) Keep on keeping on.
 
I just wanted to add to this thread that we at Pink Triangle Theatre are truly making waves here in the UK with our very passionate and powerful SHOW ONE!

We are four gay guys, two couples, and the show is written from our own experiences and from those we have read about, heard about or seen for ourselves.

The performance is only 30 minutes long but covers everything from Parents guiding their children towards certain toys, to homophobia in the media and out on the streets, and even covers heterophobia.

It really is making waves, but much more than the show, the discussion workshops we hold afterwards are [proving to be extremely powerful and even groundbreaking. We open ourselves up to any and all questions from the audience. These workshops often run on for way over an hour and people, especially young people really appreciate the chance to have their questions answered.

We are hoping to take the show and workshops overseas when we can, and do offer resources and advice on our website.

Yes, it really does get better. x
 
Youth Suicide Prevention Website
<http://www.youthsuicide.ca/>
 
^
Good point. When you don't want to face what you are, bullying those like you to demonstrate (first to yourself) that you aren't is a powerful route.

It's also dangerous.
 
9. I remember when I was a child, I had a cousin Glenn. No one spoke of him “aloud”. He was no longer part of the family. I was to be the next Glenn. I grew up on a farm so I was able to fight and defend myself from the people who accused me of being a ”fag.” I remember the “You’re so gay.” Years later, I remember having only gay friends as defense mechanism. Come to think it before you think of suicide, you’re welcome here 72425605879
 
First off, I would like to thank those who've posted suicide prevention and other help links in this thread. Said links have formed the nucleus of this growing thread of LGBT-related help & awareness.

Next, I would like to draw everyone's attention to this well done and informative video. Though it pre-dates the repeal of DADT its articulate message is still pertinent:

 
Don't let bullies get to you Let it roll off you like water off a duck’s back
 
JohannBessler said:
Kinda hard to do when you're being physically assaulted, Super.
Click to expand...

Good point.

As a gal of my acquaintance discovered when a guy was making a near-successful attempt to rape her, what's most effective to let "roll off" at that point is a pair of rounds from your little snub-nosed .38 -- after which, you can let your attacker "roll off" you, stand up, and scream "Goddammitsomeonecall911!" . . . and hope the sorry bastard moves toward you so you can shoot him again.

She hated herself for that feeling. I told her not to: it was a mother's instinct wanting the world to have one less disgusting disgrace to the species lurking out there to do other women harm in the future.
 
spyro2001207 said:
suicide is a horrible thing.... no-one is ever truly alone no matter how dark it is...
Click to expand...

birddog7 said:
I wouldn't bet any large sums of money on that premise...
Click to expand...

I have to agree with birddog. Unless you've been suicidal, in the deep, dark, deadly cold of being a million miles distant from the nearest objects which are so close they're painful, that's easy to say -- but also repeatedly shown to be wrong in practice. I tie it to the line, "If only he'd said something...", because more than nine times out of ten, 'he' did say something, but it was ignored through the device of pretending 'he' didn't mean it.

Not many people really want to believe anyone they know could possibly be suicidal, that the world can have grown so dark and unbearable that the only way out seems to be death, for anyone they consider a friend. So they reinterpret warnings, overlook plain cries for help, give pat, "Oh, you don't really mean that", responses (which is a darned good way to kick someone closer to suicide!) I've known a half dozen people who killed themselves, and four who tried but failed, and their experiences matched mine: we hollered, and people dodged. We were, in fact, very, very alone, because the people closest to us ran our words through their filters and heard, "I'm having some problems, and could use some help, if you happen to have the time."

"Oh, but he didn't say he was going to kill himself!" Yeah, big defense. That tells me you've made no attempt to understand. Listen: a suicidal person already has so little self-esteem left he doesn't want anything to knock him lower. If he comes flat out and says it, he's risking you not believing it, or -- something astoundingly and despicably common -- making light of it. Those are natural psychological defense mechanisms, and he knows it, so he's not going to risk getting kicked in the emotional balls by being blatant. He is hoping that maybe, you really are his friend; friends, see, understand, so if you're really a friend, you'll get it even if it isn't direct, and he won't be alone, and he can get past the moment and fight another day -- but if you don't get it, then you weren't really a friend, in which case he's very, very glad he didn't come right out and say it, because you would have rejected him, which he couldn't have handled.

Suicidal people holler for help. They holler because they want someone to step out and say, "You're not alone". And your job is to say it -- not on words, but in actions. If you're on the phone, you hang up. If you're watching a movie, you turn it off. If you're in the middle of a final, you walk out. If you're at work, you leave. If you're cooking dinner, you turn off the kitchen. And in all cases, you go, and you do not leave your friend alone until he says he's okay -- and then you leave him with another friend.


Can't see it from that perspective? Work on it -- it could be your friend next: be ready.
 
Us boys have to start giving our strength to one another, and helping as well as loving each other for being who we are. If ANYONE is reading this, and is feeling sad, suicidal, or dealing with something overwhelming, PLEASE PM me, and I will be more than happy to email/IM/or even talk on the phone with you.
You are all so beautiful, and strong. Don't let the bullies of this world get you down.
WE ALL HAVE BEEN DEPRESSED. Some more than others. This is a fantastic site, and I thank God that it is here.

I love you all.
 
In regard to feeling suicidal... I can relate to that. I would like to, if I may... share a thought with you all.

Last year, my partner went missing. He went out one evening, telling me he was going to get some milk from the petrol station, and would be right back. It was gone 1am so I just thought "ok" as he has done this before, and the petrol station is about 5 mins away by car.

3am arrived... no sign. It got to 9am in the morning, and I was frantic with worry, as this was unusual for my partner not to come home. I tried to keep myself busy with housework to take my mind off things, and kept thinking to myself "maybe he fell asleep in the car at the petrol stations car park?"

His parents both tried to phone here looking for him as they usually do on a daily basis. I had to tell them the news. After a conference call (and it was now 6pm) I decided on calling in the Police. They turned up, asked questions, searched the house, etc... and left. At 8pm an officer turned up, and yet another search on the house. I explained it had already been done, but to only meet ingorance. I was very depressed, upset and close to breaking down.

10am the next day, a couple of officers arrived at my door, and I assumed the worst. But, turns out they wanted to search the house :mad:

Anyhow, by this time, I had really had enough... I felt I could not go on any more, and overdosed. I was rushed into our local hospital and was kept in overnight. It was only then that the Police really noticed how frantic I was.

Take some advice from someone who knows how it feels.... TALK to someone. Do you have a close friend, neighbour, teacher, mentor, etc? If not, the Samaritans can help. I was lucky enough to survive, but am paying for it now as I still suffer from bad health. And to top it all off, I have a permanant problem with my spine.

Remember everyone at JUB is here for you too... and I for one wish to thank both the Admins, and Moderators for making everyone feel welcome and safe. Thanks guys (*8*):kiss:
 
JohannBessler said:
I feel angry for you, JK.

The kindest way I can put it is that if that were to happen to me, explanations from the other person would have been demanded.
Click to expand...

Kind indeed.

Someone who pulled that on me would find his stuff boxed on the porch, with a note to the effect that since he didn't say where he was going, I won't say why I did it.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top