I'm I stupid 2 believe the signs?

[jasongibsonraven]

Guys I live in North Carolina the sourthernmost point. I am bi however I have not been sexually active for three years. My last time was with a girl. The sex was great to be honest, however, I have want to have sex with a guy since. I have not had the balls to do it, especially in my home town.

Recent (this past Saturday) I decided after reading the some parts of JUB forum pages and gay stories that if I want to get up with a dude I need to be bold and do it. I did and it has bite me in the ass.

This is how it bite me in the butt.
I have had a crush on this dude since middle school. So I decided to write a short discreet letter to him explaining my crush and I would like to hangout if it was cool with him.(I have heard that he was bi) Gave him my number to text me for the hangout. Furthermore, I explain to him that if I offend him by providing this information he can forget about it. Well a week later and boys no text. I seen him today driving by and he turns his head to the other direction. It was rejection right boys?

Here's more information to better understand the situation. In school he would hangout and give sudtle hints (flirting). After high school I went off to school came back home and I never was interested in men at home because of religious values. But two years ago I went into his store and he like squeeze my shoulder and pat my back with a smirty smile. Well I really did not think anything of it until he became quizitify one day. Well I left it along until recently when he seen me at the gym and he winked and smiled at me. Well the brave ass I became followed through and now I hate myself for doing it. Boys I need advice help something. This was out of the norm for me.

 

[rareboy]

Well. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

But here's the thing. He's probably wondering 'What the fuck?'

Out of the blue, you suddenly are telling him that you have a long term crush and would like to hang out.

Have you considered that he might not be available and is uncomfortable with your newly declared desire to hang out with him? Particularly since he's only ever been casually friendly with you on a few occasions.

And here's the thing. You infer that you did it just did it so that you could maybe have sex with a guy. Not apparently because you wanted to be his friend. He is just the most obvious and convenient possibility in your home town.

So yes. He's avoiding you now. Get over it. Don't keep kicking yourself for it though. If he actually flirted a bit with you recently at the gym, then you following up isn't completely creepy. A little creepy, but not unbelievably creepy.


And what is quizitify?

Don't take this the wrong way, but if your message to him contained as many spelling and grammatical errors as your post here does, he may not have been very impressed with your ability to communicate. He may be thinking that you are not an intellectually compatible match.

And this is not me being a member of the grammar Gestapo. Or inferring that you are stupid. I think that you should consider some adult education courses in order for you to communicate more effectively.

A lot of people actually do place value on brains as well as good looks and even personality when they are selecting friends and fuck buddies.

 

[KaraBulut]

There's nothing wrong with what you did. It's more the media in which you did it.

A lot of guys in small towns live in fear of being found out. More than anything, he's probably wondering who has been talking behind his back and why you would think he might be be gay or bi.

So, there's usually a lot that goes unsaid between these encounters with guys in small towns. If you would have had a similar conversation with him with a lot of eye contact and flirting that left it at "Let's go grab a beer sometime" - that would have been received as a more subtle invitation. And then there's the "fishing buddy" or "hunting buddy" thing that's popular in rural areas.

But, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

 

[jasongibsonraven]

Sorry for the grammical and spelling errors, I was drunk when I write the piece. Furthermore, its not an editorial for the Times.

However, guys I'm real new on how to get a guy. I tried to be discreet with the letter because this dude has people around him all the time. He owns his on business and its hard to get him alone. The dude and myself goes way back: church, school, and same social circles (Stalking out of the equation). I thought the letter would be the easiest media and method to at least get his attend. I do not attend or cruise gay bars because I'm not into that scene. An no I don't think gay men drops to the knee's because they are propositioned.

Guy I want to add, I think I have offended yall and I want to say I am sorry I will never post again. But thanks for the insight you have provided.

 

[Georgiadude]

what did you do to offend us? This is exactly the place to come for advice and information. Relax. Your being WAY too hard on yourself.

You took a chance and it didn't pay off. Most of the time it doesn't. But you can't let it keep you from trying again. Learn from this and turn it into something positive. Dont let it get to you so much. All of us have done something that back fired or didn't turn out the way we had intended. That's part of life.

I'm not trying to tell you to "out" yourself but it is a lot easier to find someone to be with if people know what your looking for. There has to be some gay/bi social organizations, clubs, groups etc. in or near your area. Take another chance and go to one. You will be amazed at how good it feels to be around people that are "like" you.

Good luck and let us know how its going. We can't help if you don't let us know whats going on.

 

[SilverWolf]

Sorry for the grammical and spelling errors, I was drunk when I write the piece. Furthermore, its not an editorial for the Times.

However, guys I'm real new on how to get a guy. I tried to be discreet with the letter because this dude has people around him all the time. He owns his on business and its hard to get him alone. The dude and myself goes way back: church, school, and same social circles (Stalking out of the equation). I thought the letter would be the easiest media and method to at least get his attend. I do not attend or cruise gay bars because I'm not into that scene. An no I don't think gay men drops to the knee's because they are propositioned.

Guy I want to add, I think I have offended yall and I want to say I am sorry I will never post again. But thanks for the insight you have provided.

Hey, I don't think you offended anybody or at the least you didn't offend me. I think it would OK to continue posting

 

[KaraBulut]

Guy I want to add, I think I have offended yall and I want to say I am sorry I will never post again. But thanks for the insight you have provided.

No need to apologize. Please continue to post.

There are people from around the globe on this forum. Some are native english speakers, some are not.... and there's a variety of styles...so you may find that what seems to be rudeness is just a matter of bluntness, broken english or general pissiness.

Don't take it personally.

 

[thebluestmerman]

I'm from NC too, and all I know to tell you is...since you seem to be taking a new path in your life (by accepting your sexuality) then you should also look to include new people in that journey and not limit yourself to past fantasies, ya know?