I'm Shrinking

[gmoney]

stop it marvtha...must be better person....

That's my Marvtha! I knew that shrink couldn't change you!

 

[marvtha]

No all quite when you went

TOPHER had a head ache and BERF had a celebrity to sleep with - I was left to make a single pringle protest and pick my own pickle!

next time i go dumpster diving i'll give ya a holler!
WHAT?.....it's a perfectly good way to spend a saturday evening!
maybe we can get "trashy" amidst the garbage!!!!!!!!

 

[marvtha]

That's my Marvtha! I knew that shrink couldn't change you!

G MO!!!!!!
DAMNIT....a womans got needs ya know?!?

i cancel my "bed in" cause of my shrink and he probably got home .... put on his lacy bra and panties and danced around to his doris day records!
now come on....
pot...... "hey kettle.......you're black!"

 

[Pringle]

BERF

So much to learn - so little time.

I would be honoured to be something stiff for you to lean on.

You will need someone there to make sure ol Mavs is gentle with ya - does have a habit of getting carried away and it would be good if your first time was kinda memorable???

 

[marvtha]

Marvtha, darlin'! How ya doin'? I'd be happy to go "dumpster divin'" with you any time! Sounds like fun. You know what they say... One person's trash is another one's treasure!!!

Hey, listen, hon. I have a confession to make. There's something you really oughta know about me. I'm an alcohol virgin. That's right. Never been drunk. Never had a single drink. I'm not even legal for that yet. But my 21st is right around the corner, so I was wondering if you would take me under your wing and introduce me to the wonders of alcohol consumption. I can't think of anyone I'd rather tie my first good one on with! Maybe Pringie should come along too (just in case I end up needing help walking or need to be dragged somewhere). Whaddya think???

sweetie.......

marvtha had her first drink when i was still in my "nappys"
mother would be passed out from the drink and papa said i'd crawl over to her nightstand and rock it until' her glass of whatever her drink of the day was would tip over and i'd open my mouth wide drinking in the spillage!!!

but that was me!

YOU on the other hand mr. BERF should think seriously about this because drinkin with ol' marvs is like playin with fire sweetie!

somebodys gonna get hurt!!!

it's just a fact....when marvtha hits the town there's lots of fuckin and fightin!
now it ain't marvtha doin' the scufflin' but rather the mens vying for my attention!

what can i say...i put out these phermones or whatever that make the men come smellin around like dogs in heat!
the scientists say it has somehing to do with my overactive glands that swell up....unlike you normal folk!
so if you can handle all the "hella baloo" then we'll get PRINGIE and some other muffins and maybe they can be a protective shield whilst i get my groove on!

marvtha's goin to hell for corruptin' another one!!!!

 

[Nonimus]

Pringle!!! Thanks, bud. I'm an eager student, but I'll need guidance. Plenty of guidance.

Pfft, if you're gonna learn - learn from the best- and if i aint around, Millsy'll sort you out.

 

[Nonimus]

Noni, it would be a privilege and an honor. But realize that due to my total inexperience I may be a bit "high maintenance". Hope you don't mind!!

So long as you leave your wallet open when you pass out, I'll get us home safe n sound.

 

[marvtha]

Pfft, if you're gonna learn - learn from the best- and if i aint around, Millsy'll sort you out.

SUMINON!!!!!!!!
you stay away from this froshling!!!

and don't you be sending him any of that stella piss to try and get him under your spell!!!
if you must......take my flesh but leave the boy alone!!

~dramatic sigh~

 

[marvtha]

Marvtha, I've made up my mind. As soon as I'm legal I wanna hit the town HARD! They'll have to beat my drunken ass out the door with a broom at closing time. I'll probably wake up in some alley with my head pounding, my pants around my ankles and my face in a big crusty puddle of my own vomit. So I'm gonna need HELP!!!

it has been decided then..
mark it on your calendars muffins...on this day BERF becomes a man.....

and another bites the dust!!!

 

[Nonimus]

SUMINON!!!!!!!!
you stay away from this froshling!!!

and don't you be sending him any of that stella piss to try and get him under your spell!!!
if you must......take my flesh but leave the boy alone!!

~dramatic sigh~

I see, I've been chewed up n spat out - another victim of the Marvtha sex machiene

 

[Nonimus]

SUMINON!!!!!!!!

I can always tell when you're angry, you call me by my surname.

 

[marvtha]

You've got a deal, bud. Thanks!!!

BERF!!!!!!!!!!

NEVER NEVER trust a CHAV!!!!!!!
especially one as wiley as SUMINON!

i could spend hours telling you the horror that this man has put me through.

my screams still echo thru the halls of the DARK PLACE!!!!
endless hours of prodding and experimentation and that was just the sex!
the torture was even more horrible!!!

please BERF........drop the stella and RUN!!!!

 

[Nonimus]

Come on Berf, come to Uncle Noni - i'll take you to see some 'puppies' - you'd like that wouldn't you?

 

[Nonimus]

Awww, I just love puppies!!!

Oh there's lots of puppies where i'm taking you - now jump in my car, mummy sent me to fetch you!

 

[marvtha]

I see, I've been chewed up n spat out - another victim of the Marvtha sex machiene

play it off like you are the jaded lover left out in the cold but my muffins know better NOMI..... errr...i mean... SUMINON!!!!
damn you...blinded by your bling and your smooth charm innit!!!!


AWAY!!!!!!!!!!

 

[marvtha]

Awww, I just love puppies!!!

BERF..........he promises you puppies but you'll end up in the dog house ............infested with chav fleas wearing little burberry caps and chain smoking!!!!!!!

 

[marvtha]

RED ALERT MUFFINS.............

BERF NEEDS SAVED!!!!!!!!!

~grabs stella and Maccy D coupons for bartering and runs out the door~

 

[Nonimus]

~grabs stella and Maccy D coupons for bartering and runs out the door~

Ok, deal. You can keep the kid, this time - but you can't be with him 24/7

 

[marvtha]

Ok, deal. You can keep the kid, this time - but you can't be with him 24/7

HA....a chav just can't resist the Stella & Maccy D's!!!!

my muffins are stronger than you think....WOW..... .that ones really ripe!
it wouldn't hurt to use a bar of soap......

ummmm....anyhoo............BERF....you're safe for now.

 

[marvtha]

Marvtha!!!! He touched my peepee!!!

sweetie........you sure about your big night out with marvtha & co.because there are going to be degenerates doing more than "touching" your peepee!!!! and i'm just talking about the muffins!