In love with a Straight Married Man :(

[that_dam_cool]

I am so lost i have a loving partner and i love him but ive fallen madly in love with another man who is straight and married and has children. I just cant get him out of my head i want to tell him i love him but i cant for fear of ruining our friendship or scaring him off. Please help me?

 

[sosotun9091]

I am so lost i have a loving partner and i love him but ive fallen madly in love with another man who is straight and married and has children. I just cant get him out of my head i want to tell him i love him but i cant for fear of ruining our friendship or scaring him off. Please help me?

There’s no point if your love is not reciprocated. So try seeing him less often. Or, are you sure he’s completely straight?

 

[KaraBulut]

Occasionally, there are two people who meet and fall in love, even though they are with other people.

This is not one of those cases.

You can tell your straight, married friend who has children that you're in love with him. It will probably end your friendship or make things very uncomfortable for him. It is likely to end your relationship with your partner.

And for what? Nothing. Whether you are in love or not, it doesn't matter. Nothing good is ever going to come from this.

There's no easy solution for you. If there's something lacking in your relationship, work on it.

If you can't get a grip on your feelings for your straight, married with children friend, then you need to avoid spending time with that friend until you get control of your feelings.

If you can't get control of this situation, you need to get into therapy and figure out why you're self-sabotaging your happiness.

 

[that_dam_cool]

Occasionally, there are two people who meet and fall in love, even though they are with other people.

This is not one of those cases.

You can tell your straight, married friend who has children that you're in love with him. It will probably end your friendship or make things very uncomfortable for him. It is likely to end your relationship with your partner.

And for what? Nothing. Whether you are in love or not, it doesn't matter. Nothing good is ever going to come from this.

There's no easy solution for you. If there's something lacking in your relationship, work on it.

If you can't get a grip on your feelings for your straight, married with children friend, then you need to avoid spending time with that friend until you get control of your feelings.

If you can't get control of this situation, you need to get into therapy and figure out why you're self-sabotaging your happiness.

I really thank you for this advice I think I am self-sabotaging my happiness it's not as easy just to avoid him I work with him. He's such a beautiful person inside and to me outside. He has a wife and kids which would eat me up with the guilt if something happened which I know as you say wouldn't. I think our friendship would be so uncomfortable if I said anything but sometimes I just wanna scream at him how much I love him I flirt with him and I think he knows I fancy him but as you say it's not reciprocated or at least I don't think so.

It's so difficult and I get mad if I don't hear from him and stuff what's wrong with me does this happen to others is it just a case of want what you can't have?

 

[Cottonforme]

Just take an opportunity, timing is crucial, and tell him you love him. But couch it in terms of man love. Sorta "Hey man, love you." with a big smile. See how he reacts, then go from there. A few beers might be good idea first
At least you will get some indication from his response.

Love you too

 

[Celso]

You should stay away. There are plenty of men out there. He has a partner and a family already. For sure his priorities are his wife and their sons.

The only possibility is friendship without lust because friendship is a higher form of love, but if you can't control yourself the correct option is getting away from him even if it means looking for another job. Your feelings and intentions may be good, but the road to hell is made by good intentions.

 

[TX-Beau]

Just take an opportunity, timing is crucial, and tell him you love him. But couch it in terms of man love. Sorta "Hey man, love you." with a big smile. See how he reacts, then go from there. A few beers might be good idea first
At least you will get some indication from his response.

Love you too

Getting him drunk and then making a move is a predators game plan. Don't fuck with other people's relationships. It isn't being a stand up guy. It's being a asshole.

 

[Cottonforme]

Wasn't advocating getting him drunk. A conversation over a few quiet beers is what I was meaning. It mlightens the mood so the awkward issues can be discussed. Nothing more than that. Nothing to do with being a preditor.

 

[MusicMan321]

See how it goes talk to him see were it goes from there

 

[Simplyb1]

If your enjoying your time being with him better not rock the boat. I began 8yrs mow posting looking for men instested blowjob only every married straight man basically said thing. They hookup with gay men other bisexual men usually married also as I was divorced now they feel safe with men because they get pleasure from giving oral. Ive had straight men do some wonderful things with me but never giving oral back
Most them cock sucking in their bed very few women will most homosexual men will . And so many men want to give oral Theres something that hasn't connected with them they are content on the receiving side fantasies about giving probley shock being caught with your mouth around a man's cock whereas recieving most people agree with it but accept it. Even though you broke his marriage up he's not gonna be open with a gay unless he gives also

 

[Junior42]

Im in the same boat as you man, but my fantasies or whatnot happened with mine, started as just a blowjob when his wife was pregnant and not putting out, to a bj here and there for fun, to pretty regular. One day he was really horny and asked if I wanted to fuck him. He had never done it, and while it was fun in the moment, he said it hurt a bit and wasn't sure he would ever want to do it again. We have not done anything in awhile, but the other day he stopped over and for some reason found a reason to take his shirt off and show me something and it kick started all the feelings I have for him. I have many straight friends, who I never would mess around with, and I wish this one was one of them now because I want him all the time, and because we have in the past I feel like he should just let it continue. He has all the cards in the friendship/relationship and its not a great place to be if im being honest. Good luck with your situation.

 

[Apollosfire]

I am single and i have a crush on guy i used to know as a Boyscout. He has recently decided to explore his bisexuality. He had a thing for me back then and decided to go with traditional route. I don't want to give you false hope but it took so long to figure out and i can't believe we finally made out after a picnic on park. This feeling can be harder than people think. It's not always a cis male fantasy it actually annoying bc i don't have cliche jealously for his wife and his kid is.....a child who deserves her dad. So all i can say is be aware there is going to doubt and stigma and times just as any other relations.

What does your husband/boyfriend say? Do you have a physical attraction or work friends....is there any feed back. I know the guy i like thinks its just a physical thing. I feel like many star there and it takes men a few more aspects like trust and level of discretion to move on or decide to risk it. Let us know how it goes.


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