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In The Butt Question

C

christajames

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OK guys, it's my first post here after lurking here a long time. First of all I want to say what a great place this is especially for younger gay guys who need a little guidance. Everyone here is so helpful. I alot of time wish I could help, but I have little experience.

About me, I'm a middle aged closet case, trying to work my way out, but I live in a small conservative town and work in a small company...I'm sure you know the story. Here's some background on my problem...

My main interests are in oral, jacking and massage, etc. Other than understanding the tightness of the hole, and how nice that might be, I've always wondered about anal sex and why so many guys enjoy being bottom. I've read about how even a doctor exam can sometimes cause an ejaculation, from prostatic stimulation. This much I understand.

In my case, I have hemmorroids, and have always been afraid of penatration because of the possibility of bleeding and pain for several days. A few weeks ago, I threw caution to the wind and greased up a good long dildo and slid it up there nice and slow. I was surprised there was no pain, and it didn't bother the 'roids', but as much as I worked it around, I couldn't find the sweet spot...the prostate I always hear about. Is there a key to this I don't know about? Does the warmth of a real penis make a differance, our does a phsycological thing kick in...knowing a buddie's dick is in you? Or is my prostate to old and withered? Ha Ha.

Any advice you guys have is much appreciated. BTW anyone in the n.e. Ohio area near Ashtabula?

Take care:help:
 
christajames said:
Is there a key to this I don't know about? Does the warmth of a real penis make a differance, our does a phsycological thing kick in...knowing a buddie's dick is in you? Or is my prostate to old and withered? Ha Ha.
Click to expand...

Anal sex is a mixture of different sensations. There is a mild pain that has a pleasure component to it once you get used to it. Most guys describe the other sensations as being either fullness, prostate pleasure or anal pleasure- or a combination of the three.

Each guy is different. There are many more positions that you can try with a real dick that add a new dimension beyond what you can get with a toy. And there is a mental aspect to getting fucked that can't be replicated with a sex toy.

The anus is very rich in nerve endings and is the source of a lot of the pleasure/pain sensation.

The prostate stimulation is not as much from the presence of a dildo or dick in your ass- it is more the movement and pressure of the dick or toy passing back and forth over the your prostate. Try using your finger to massage your prostate while masturbating and if you enjoy this, then return to using your toy.

The point of sex is pleasure. Not specific pleasure from the penis, ass, tongue or any particular body part. Explore but if having something in your ass doesn't do it for you, then just spend your time doing the stuff that you do enjoy.
 
Welcome to the posting side of JUB. :wave:

Yeah, gay sex isn't a choreographed dance - it's a lengthy menu. You can order the same thing every time, you can pick from a few favorites, you can sample this or that, or you can spend your entire life trying to try them all. It's totally up to you and the guy (or guys) in bed with you. Some guys receive anal exclusively, and never want to do anything else. Other couples never bother with anal. It just depends on individual tastes.

As for finding the prostate, yeah, Kara's got it. Lube up your fingers and nudge around for it. You'll know when you get there. It may be jaw-dropping amazing, it make be enh-OK. Different strokes for different folks.

As for where you live, well, you may consider working on your skill set and moving to a bigger area. If the mountain won't come to Mohammed...

Lex
 
I used to have hemmorhoid problems but ultimately had them surgically removed and that made a huge difference...huge for a committed bottom like me!

Not everyone is meant to be a bottom, but it's what I love. Hard to describe the sensations for me (Kara came pretty close above), but there's nothing quite like it.
 
I just wanted to say welcome to posting--glad you did.

I hope the good advice offered above is useful.

Take care--and post more! :wave:
 
Thanks for the "in-put" guys. I wish I could have answered sooner. I guess this is my first step in coming out, I want to at least start by talking about it even if it is anonymous. I've spent too many years with this bottled up.
 
Wow! I just noticed my Join date is Sept. 2004. Could I possibly have been lurking here this long? God i hope not! Must be a mistake! Oh well*|*
 
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