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In Your Opinion....

S

scissors

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Ok, here's the deal. It's my first year in university. The first day I was here, one particular guy caught my attention. I just sort of dismissed the idea after a minute; I just knew he was cute. Later that week I created a Facebook account on the internet (for those of you who don't know, facebook is basically a safer myspace that only allows people from the university check your profile). My page clearly displayed the fact that I'm interested in guys. The next morning I check my account mail and discover that the same guy has sent me a message. So I mailed him back, and he responded, giving me his msn address. So we've been talking over the past days and we seem to get along pretty well. In fact, he invited me to go visit him at his apartment. But here's the thing: on his facebook profile he sets 'interests' as both men and women. This, however, does not mean he's bi: it could possibly mean that he's just looking for friends and not a relationship. So there is no way for me to tell if he's gay or straight. Based on this story, what do you guys think? I'd really hate to develop some sort of 'crush' on him and he turns out to be straight. Such a dilemma. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
 
Keep your sexual feelings low for now, if you can do that. See what he is like after you go over his place.

He could just be looking for a friendship with no sex.
 
Duh lol if your profile clearly says you are gay and he was the one that contacted you first knowing that you are gay, whats the big deal in just flat out asking him if he is gay.

Just ask him over msn.

This reminds me of that will and grace episode where will and grace were dating the same man but didnt know for sure if he was gay or straight and had to ask jack LOL.
 
Did newboy12 actually just give good advice and made sense and didn't throw in some refrence to some seduction of a straight man that probably only happened in his mind.

Call the weather bureau and see if Hell froze over.

Anyway... Yeah, he knows you're gay and invited you to his apartment alone.

Do you need a slide rule?
 
Um, Gee....Newboy and Soilwork (yep, I mentioned them together!) are hitting the nail on the head.

Why go back into the closet now, suddenly. You are OUT. You did that bravely with your Facebook entry. So show him what OUT means.

Just ask him if he's gay. Good luck!
 
You are already comfortable with your own skin so yeah, go over and tell him that you're gay!

If he freaks out, you know it upfront that he has only been interested in friends. But it doesn't sound like this will happen so good luck! :D
 
A very cool way to do it would be once you get there... ask hiim "so.. are we just hanging out or is this a date?"


Of course.. if he's shy and not sure about his sexual orientation, that might be SO forward as to send him reeling backwards.

fun to watch, but no happy ending.

Just go over there and play it by ear. and don't let yourself fall for him until you know what you'll be falling ON.
 
Soilwork said:
A very cool way to do it would be once you get there... ask hiim "so.. are we just hanging out or is this a date?"


Of course.. if he's shy and not sure about his sexual orientation, that might be SO forward as to send him reeling backwards.

fun to watch, but no happy ending.

Just go over there and play it by ear. and don't let yourself fall for him until you know what you'll be falling ON.
Click to expand...

True. Never go with expectations that something will happen. You don't want a crushing fall!!!
 
You see, the problem is that I am having the most difficult time meeting people here. In highschool I could go from table to table at lunch and make friends without any problems. For some reason my social skills have been completely destroyed the minute I moved here. This guy is one of the few friends I've made so far and I would really hate to ruin that. Is it better just to wait and see how things play out?
 
No it isn't better, nor is it worse.

Just trust your insticts, and play things by ear.

Don't just let your fears control you at the same time.
 
Oh by the way, if he is gay, you don't have to date him. You can always be friends if you want and that makes you feel safer.
 
Well, it seems he already knows you're gay. So I doubt he will leave you. In fact, its your being gay that made him MSN you.

There's no perfect answer 'cause we don't know what's going on inside his head. You seem like a very smart and capable guy, scissors. You've done well so far. Just trust your instincts.

And Rolands right, it doesn't have to be a date even if he is gay. I don't send flowers to every gay guy I meet.

As for making friends, that will improve as you become more familiar with who is in your classes. It is different than the cafeteria in HS but soon you and they will recognize each other outside of class and then your social skills will kick in.
 
Advice here is good.

As to uni and making friends... it is different than high school. Give it some time, you'll figure it out as well.
 
My God, I'm posting all of my problems here from now on! Since I posed my initial question, this guy has said that he's gay and invited me to dinner this week. Thanks everyone so much for your advice, it was GREATLY appreciated! I just hope he's not reading this.....
 
scissors said:
My God, I'm posting all of my problems here from now on! Since I posed my initial question, this guy has said that he's gay and invited me to dinner this week. Thanks everyone so much for your advice, it was GREATLY appreciated! I just hope he's not reading this.....
Click to expand...

WOW!! Congratulations and I wish you the very best!!! :D
 
scissors said:
Thanks everyone so much for your advice, it was GREATLY appreciated! I just hope he's not reading this.....
Click to expand...
If he is, he's going to know what a great guy you are. :)

Congratulations. Keep us posted! ..|
 
scissors said:
My God, I'm posting all of my problems here from now on!
Click to expand...

No, no, NO!!!

We don't want to be the ultimitate receptacle of all your problems. This board is completely useless when it comes dow to money issues ;)

We will take whatever is left though :p

And congrats on your friend, hope you love the friendly dinner and/or date (whatever it is :) )
 
We don't want to be the ultimitate receptacle of all your problems. This board is completely useless when it comes dow to money issues

We will take whatever is left though
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Unless you have too much money and don't know what to do with it. In which case, I can give you my address.
 
Like I said, I'm in university. There is no such thing as 'too much money' here.
 
jockboy01 said:
Unless you have too much money and don't know what to do with it. In which case, I can give you my address.
Click to expand...

This falls under "We will take whatever is left though :p"

Like I said, I'm in university. There is no such thing as 'too much money' here.
Click to expand...

See we can't help you there with this problem, JUB is only good at "helping" you with money, if you were hemorrhaging money we could "help" you. The problem is that you are "being" hemorrhaged and we just can't help you with that ;)
 
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