is anal sex degrading to the bottom?

[G-Lexington]

>>>the site also implies that the receiver only tolerates anal sex to please his partner and receives no pleasure from the act and is as close to the act of rape as you can get

I say we leave the rebuttal for dduder. See, he claims that ALL gays - not most gays, ALL gays - are natural bottoms, and the only reason gays top is so they can get topped in return.

Lex

 

[Wajdan]

It is kinda degrading as you offer yourself to another person and it is the bot that has to do all the prep like douching and to bear pain while the top enjoys. Still bots can also be controlling n they also get pleasures from the act. Many bots can't even think of topping and love the feeling of being pounded...

As a versatile, I think its a win-win situation for both and a top should respect the bot (which unfortunately most don't)...

 

[Wajdan]

In fact, I posted a related thread recently.
http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?t=254050

 

[Jersey Domino]

I don't get this thread.

A top needs a bottom. A bottom needs a top. It's about sharing your bodies, which is the ultimate in sexual connection. Claiming it's "degrading" or whatever is just ignorant. It's all about giving and receiving pleasure regardless which position one is in. It takes two (or more) to do the sexual tango.

I agree I think this whole discussion is silly.

 

[Shepherd 2]

In a loving relatonship where it is about making love this is a non question. I feel loved by my partner no matter how we are doing out sexual acting out. Make love and you will see.

Shep+

 

[JUB]

The ultimate paradox...that the submissive is actually the one in charge of the dominator.

For the dominator to dominate, he or she needs a submissive.

Control can be a very, very fluid concept.

Is anal sex degrading?

Context is everything...that's my position.

Very well put

 

[Beachguyj]

to any bottoms here, do you feel degraded when you're being fucked?

Some of the frot advocates say this, but i reckon if a bottom doesn't feel demasculated, then what's the problem?

Not degrading at all. It takes a strong man to take a dick in his ass.

 

[Ninja108]

I've never felt degraded, only love and pleasure when having sex with my bf

 

[EwanSF]

Not in the slightest. I've never met any frot advocats...ever, but from what I've gathered from reading some of thier views, this sort of outlook is very much in line with the whole straight-acting thing. Those that just want to be seen as a straight guy that fucks men. Smacks of insercurity.

 

[cklover]

I don't find it degrading at all and I don't feel that I'm being submissive. I willingly take a cock in me. I derive great pleasure from having a guy fuck me. In fact I prefer to be the bottom and will only rarely top another guy.

 

[nsguy2]

Being penetrated doesn't make you a bottom - being underneath another person makes you the bottom.

Do the frot advocates only grind on their sides?

What I find most peculiar about this is why a group a people feel that just because they opt to not engage in anal sex, it's somehow makes it degrading when others enjoy it.

I wonder how they feel about the box spring and mattress?

 

[cklover]

Being penetrated doesn't make you a bottom - being underneath another person makes you the bottom.

I've bottomed from the top before. It's a whole different feeling sitting down on a cock from when I'm on my back or on my knees. It all feels good though.

 

[bankside]

Is anal sex degrading to "the bottom.." Yes. Is anal sex degrading to "the top.." Also yes.

Is it degrading when my guy and I do it? No. I'm making love to him, not "the bottom" or "the top."

I find it sad when people have to adopt a role or a persona to get off. Role playing can be fun, but not as a way of life that locks you into being typecast in bed and in relationships...

Also I know some people do have a sincere preference, but I would find it incredibly boring if he only wanted one side of anal sex. For me the ability to have it both ways is one of the main plusses of being gay. Transpogue you mention some women who won't get fucked unless they get to do the same thing...the "guy on top" mentality was one of the big things that put me off heterosexuality - it is great to know there are women out their at least aware of the role dynamic.

I think it is sad when people have to be "the top" or "the bottom" or when the have to dress like one of the village people, or pretend they are not the equal of the person they are with, just to have an orgasm.

 

[bankside]

Plus it is all socially constructed bullshit anyway. Why don't they describe a vagina or an ass as "capturing" the penis and controlling it? It is just as easy to see it in those terms, but we're used to buying into the bullshit ideas about "top" and "bottom."

 

[Nude_Dude]

to any bottoms here, do you feel degraded when you're being fucked?

The top can be in control, I can be in control, or we can be equals, depending on what we want to do or what we're into.

When I first discovered dude on dude sex, there was the term "butch and bitch" - for what we now know "top and bottom"
It WAS pretty degrading, with the "bitch" seen as the woman in the coupling - in what we call today "bottom shaming"
Back then your preferred - or expected - role was secret, held pretty close to your chest, even if your beau de jour always DIDN'T
It was some sort of badge of honour - to be thought of as the "man" in the relationship
(I'd hoped we'd matured some - in that respect - though maybe we haven't ?)

... as for "degrading" ?
I recall a character in a novel, I read in my late teens saiyng "it's not about one guy fucking another guy - it's about two guys fucking"
I never felt anything but a guy - from that day

... and the "pain" ?
As a gay kid, all of 17 - and a hopeless romantic - I saw surrendering myself to dudes I really liked, or even loved, as the greatest gift I could give any man - and never possibly to be physically closer
(even when it hurt like all hell)

Every dude I met (unfortunately, or fortunate) packed an ultra-thick 8 or 9 incher
(was I getting a "highly recommended" citation, out there, in "Monster Cock Land" ?)
It took just one monster to "break in" that green little twink

If your heart says "bottom" - but your beautiful, tight little hole says "no way" - try this, in your own comfort zone
Find yourself a huge hung fuck buddy - or get the help of an old, huge hung best buddy if the idea doesn't freak out either of you
He'll need to be gentle, tender, caring, very patient, even "loving"
- and prepared to make the moment about YOU, not about HIM
If his slow, well lubed entry hurts like all hell - don't have him pull out, but just have him stay perfectly still
In this little semi-break, mutual soft handed exploration of each others bodies is worthwhile
A few soft kisses can work small miracles
If you're familiar with meditation - head towards a state of mindfulness
Breathe slowly, breathe deeply

When you're ready, let him know to start slowly moving, again

Repeat - for as long as you can - and repeat every day you have the opportunity

Always remember, also
Hurt as it may - this is NOT going to cause any serious injury
Remember, you’ve probably had MUCH larger things EXITING from there - than are ever going to attempt ENTRY
At some stage you'll realise - "Hey, this doesn't HURT anymore - this is starting to feel really GOOD"

Congratulations !
You've smashed down that pain wall, that's been holding you away from something wonderful
And it just gets better - and better

Of course - my best friend, partner, lover and soulmate of 24 years is 5'8" with a four and a half inch dick
But can we ever choose who we fall in love with ?

So I’ve wised up to ...
Monster cocks are for incredible sex - on a physical level
Little dicks are made for making love
The BF – and a few VERY old buddies and exes, I know well, on their 'for the old times' asking – are the ONLY dudes I’ll go “doggy” for

NEITHER of us are on a leash
I'll still grab the occasional "monster" from Grindr
It's hard to remember why these big rewards from God once scared me so much ?
The BF will pick up a young top - when he's in a rare bottoming mood


If any of this life experience and wisdom from this “old dude” has helped just ONE of the kids, out there – I’ll be happy it was worthwhile


XXX

 

[fabulouslyghetto]

Depends on the top

 

[rareboy]

If you are doing it right...it sure as hell isn't.

It is only degrading if you want it to be. And some have that kink.

 

[fabulouslyghetto]

If you are doing it right...it sure as hell isn't.

It is only degrading if you want it to be. And some have that kink.

Although sometimes, if youre doing it right, it is. Just a little bit. I mean choking, calling me a dirty bitch, a little slap here and there, it builds character.

 

[backagain]

Not to this bottom.
Hell, I have always loved dick in my ass. Ride that ass. Have fun because I am.

 

[rareboy]

Not to this bottom.
Hell, I have always loved dick in my ass. Ride that ass. Have fun because I am.

Total power bottom here.

When you can reduce your top to tears of joy ...it ain't degrading.

I love being a bottom. And a top. So many guys aren't ever going to know the unfuckingbeleivable pleasure of the best orgasm they will ever have by bottoming for a good top.