The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

Is it worth waiting?

L

lostnfound

Porn Star
Joined
Oct 23, 2007
Posts
489
Reaction score
0
Points
0
I'm a 22yo virgin. Not really out, so no boyfriend.

I'm so close to hooking-up w/ this guy I met online. We traded pics on AIM and he seems really sweet. He's not creepy at all.

I just don't know if should just go ahead have sex, because I've been waiting such a long time, or should I wait for that "one" guy.
 
You're the only one who can answer that question, but if unsure meet this guy in person with no promises and see where it goes.
 
^The above two posts give you all the advice you need.
 
The advice given is pretty good lostnfound... the most important thing is that you do whatever you feel comfortable with.

For some an emotional connection is important in their love making so I'm not sure that the idea that waiting for the right guy is a fantasy as such, its simply an ideal or a criteria for some thats as important as any other aspect of their lives. And if thats what feels right for you then take your time and wait it out.

The most important thing for me though, is regardless of your choices, do it for you. Do it because you want too and you feel its time.

Dont do it because you are virgin at 22. Honestly, any one who cares about you wont give a stuff whether or not your a virgin at 42, its that simple.
 
Well, just be careful and meet him, if you wish to, with a clear mind. The foreplay might be good, and he might try to want and easy you into doing something you really aren't into (for me it was bareback).

The guy was very sweet as well until I told him that unless he doesn't use a condom, that he's gotta find someone else. That's when he turned into a complete jerk and started calling me names like slut and whatnot just wanting to hook up. Well, newsflash, he wanted the hook up, too. Just because he got rejected he has to get all defensive.

So yeah, don't be a people pleaser if it's going to jeopardize your life or something. As people have mentioned, it's up to you. Just don't feel pressured to do anything.
 
Thanks everyone for the responses.

We talked on AIM for a long time last night. He knows I'm inexperienced and assured me that we'd only do what's comfortable for me. He even said it's okay if I changed my mind and backed out. Anyways, we talked about what we'd do in good detail (safe only). So, I'm not worried about the safety aspect. There's definitely not any pressure on me to do this. We both acknowledged that nothing is going to happen afterwards, so I'm just worried that I might regret this, since I will not have gained anything emotionally.

But like one said earlier, I'm just going to get out there and live.
 
My bf waited for the right guy and in ourtalks he had the chance a
few times but refrained from it. I really wish I would of waited for that one guy.. But it was so amazing cuz we both knew it was rite and the rite time so it was incrediable. So just go with your heart. If it feels rite at that time then it's rite.
 
While I think it's great that you've waited this long, and may wait longer I want to give you a little grass is greener feeling as well.

I waited until I was in a relationship, and was in that relationship for 5 years. I got out and right into another one (my current one) and have been with him for 13 years (not complaining just continuing my point)

While we've had some three ways here and there I have always slightly "regretted" (really too strong of a word) not having sewn my oats when I was younger and single (34 now). I occasionally have that nagging "regret" that I kind of wish I had slept around a bit.

It's nothing terribly, nothing constant but it's definitely clear, and definitely there.
 
tallguy297 said:
Honestly, any one who cares about you wont give a stuff whether or not your a virgin at 42, its that simple.
Click to expand...

In my opinion, people who remain a virgin much after their early twenties are not likely to have a great sexual life. When they finally do meet someone they will probably so embarrassed and lacking in the intimacy department that simply that may be a hindrance.

Plus almost everyone I've heard from who has waited a very long time to do anything until they met the "right one" will tell you they regretted it.
 
It's only worth waiting for if you think you are worth waiting for.

Technically I still have a quarter of my virginity (i've never caught, only pitched), and I'm twenty-one. I'm not ashamed or embarrassed at all.

First times are never fantastic; but you only get that one time so make sure you won't regret it. Good luck
 
Don't feel pressured AT ALL.

I'm 19 and I'm also a virgin... and I can honestly tell you that I've never felt the urge or the need to have sex with someone. There's more to life than sex. While I might have had the opportunity a couple of times, I'm not going to sleep with just anyone.

And while I will probably not wait for 'the one' ... I won't have just sex with someone without being in a relationship.

And it's up to you to decide what you want to do. Will you go ahead with it, fine. Do you want to wait, fine. Don't feel pressured whatsoever. You are the one that makes the choice. You and nobody else.

I'm sure you'll do what you feel best with. And perhaps it's best if you just go out with this guy a couple of times and then make the decision.
 
hotatlboi said:
In my opinion, people who remain a virgin much after their early twenties are not likely to have a great sexual life.
Click to expand...

I dunno. The erotic impulse is awfully compelling. So unless the person is afflicted with debilitating psychological or physical problems--which would surely affect more than just his sexual life--he's likely to get up to speed quickly whenever he does get started.

Also, I wonder how many people truly have a "great" sexual life. I don't mean to imply that a great sexual life can't or doesn't happen. I just wonder how many of the billions of sexually mature Earthlings are so fortunate.
 
It's not worth waiting...but it's also a mistake to do it just because you feel you have to.

I held off with the first coupla guys I met, just because it didn't feel right. Then I met someone who gave me an awesome first time. When it was right, I knew. But it was just a really good hookup, nothing more.

So, wait for someone you really wanna do it with, but don't wait for that ONE guy, you need to get some practice in before you meet him ;)
 
I think you should do what you want to do, if it feels right, and you trust the guy, then go for it, but, if not, then wait, I'm sure you won't be waiting forever, it may seem like it, but, it won't be.

Basically, I think you should follow your own heart.

David.
 
Thanks again for everyone's advice and support.

I thought about it and chose to go ahead and do it with him.

I am writing this, just about 2 hours after doing it. He was so nice--definitely boyfriend material, but I'm not expecting that. I came in knowing fully that it was a one-night stand. I made sure he was clean (ddf and neg).

I gave him a nice back massage. Then, we made out big time. I blew him and then he rimmed me. Next, he fingered me to loosen me up. Then, he slowly fucked me. It kind of hurt at first, but I've had constipation worst than that. To my surprise, being fucked was quite pleasant. I took it like a pro--loose and relaxed. He pulled out, because he was close to cumming. Then, we made out again, I played with his nips. He fucked me again and came on my back. Then he gave me an awesome handjob.

Do I regret it? Nope. Will I regret it in the future? Maybe.

But for now, I'm glad I got some action.
 
meet someone in person and you can carefully evaluate the situation. you are worth more than an online grab. the more natural the more fulfilling. love is natural.
 
What kind of virgin are you? Complete virgin without any experience in oral or even kissing a guy?

Personally first kiss and first anal experience, top or bottom, are something you'll never forget. I had a TERRIBLE first kiss experience when I was a teenager because I really wanted to explore and was extremely horny too. Lets just say the guy tongue raped me within the first 5 seconds... talk about disappointment :P

From that point on, I decided to wait in that at least for someone I care for before having anal sex with him... at least with that, its your own decision.

Don't believe in those movie love type of thing, too unrealistic.
 
lostnfound said:
Thanks again for everyone's advice and support.

I thought about it and chose to go ahead and do it with him.

I am writing this, just about 2 hours after doing it. He was so nice--definitely boyfriend material, but I'm not expecting that. I came in knowing fully that it was a one-night stand. I made sure he was clean (ddf and neg).

I gave him a nice back massage. Then, we made out big time. I blew him and then he rimmed me. Next, he fingered me to loosen me up. Then, he slowly fucked me. It kind of hurt at first, but I've had constipation worst than that. To my surprise, being fucked was quite pleasant. I took it like a pro--loose and relaxed. He pulled out, because he was close to cumming. Then, we made out again, I played with his nips. He fucked me again and came on my back. Then he gave me an awesome handjob.

Do I regret it? Nope. Will I regret it in the future? Maybe.

But for now, I'm glad I got some action.
Click to expand...


Congratulations mate... not only for having a great time, but weighing your feelings and emotions and doing what felt right for you. Theres no need to over think it now, relax, feel good about how things went and how you handled yourself through the whole process.

Now, with the hindsight of that experience you can decide just how you want to handle the future... and that mate is entirely up to you. Let that empower you to live your life in a way that makes you as happy as you can be.


hotatlboi said:
In my opinion, people who remain a virgin much after their early twenties are not likely to have a great sexual life. When they finally do meet someone they will probably so embarrassed and lacking in the intimacy department that simply that may be a hindrance.

Plus almost everyone I've heard from who has waited a very long time to do anything until they met the "right one" will tell you they regretted it.
Click to expand...

I get your point mate I do.

However for some people sex, especially the first time, is far more than a physical experience. And for some they may never be able to separate the emotional and physical sides.

Does that mean they will be embarrassed and lacking... no. Not even close. In fact I know of guys who were simply unable to undress in front of hook ups and yet once their hearts were involved lost all inhibitions and almost became animals.

This is simply another case of people making decisions for thier own lives, without fearing that they will be judged or criticised for them.

Whether its sex, clothes, hair or waistlines, tolerance, acceptance and understanding of peoples choices and decisions, especially from us, in my opinion for what its worth anyways, is the most important thing.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top