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Is my friend gay/bi?

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boyd291

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So he doesn't know I am, but there are so many little signs that make me think he is.


He's really touchy feely with everyone and he's had one girlfriend, when he was 18.. He's now 21.


He didn't do anything with the girl except for kiss, they split up and he was heartbroken and still claims he is..

We always try and get him with girls and he goes along with it, but when it actually comes to going on a date with them he backs out, he says he wants to concentrate on finishing University before he starts dating and stuff, but he literally finishes in a week.

The other day we went out and he was telling me about how he really wished he did fashion at uni, instead of what he's doing now.

Theres small things that make me think he is, but I don't know.

Music taste too.. we were listening to the radio and Justin Bieber came on and I turned it off and he put it back on and said he loves the song, along with One Direction. Another thing is how he kept looking at guys, not girls.. Especially when we were all drunk, thats one thing I noticed..

I was thinking about telling him that I'm bisexual, but I just haven't found the right time..
 
Just because your friend likes Justin Bieber one direction's music I don't think that's an indication he's gay or bisexual.

Maybe your friend just doesn't like it when other friends keep on hassling the guy about his love life. Some people are very private they don't want their friends getting involved in their love life.

Do you have a sexual attraction to your friend is the real question? And if your friend did tell you he was gay or bisexual what would that do to you? How would it affect your life and why would you want to know?


Also, you are never going to know the truth by looking at so called signs. But it is a precarious thing to do to ask someone about their sexual orientation. You say your friend is young and he's 21 I am guessing you are young as well. Why not just try to continue being a good friend to this guy? Maybe one day this friend is going to tell you about his sexual orientation.
 
I suppose so

He asks us to get him girls, but never follows through..

I'm not attracted to him one bit tbh.. He's not my type at all.

It doesn't really affect me to be honest, I just got wondering, I'm not the only one that thinks it though.
 
I'm wondering why you want to know if he's gay/bi? Do you want to get with him, or are you just curious about his orientation?

If you are just curious, mind your own business. It's ok to let him know that you are bi tho, since you want him to know..just don't expect him to reveal any secrets back.

If your intention is to get with him, find the time to tell him that you are bi, and then, depending upon his reaction, you could ask him if he would consider going out with you. I wouldn't come right out and ask him if he's gay or bi tho, unless he accepts your offer.

edit...I see your above post, so ignore paragraph 3 ;)
 
Your friend is whatever he says he is. If he wants to tell you otherwise, he needs to be at a place where he's accepted it and where he trusts you enough to share that information with you.


boyd291 said:
I was thinking about telling him that I'm bisexual, but I just haven't found the right time..
Click to expand...

This is probably the more important issue.
 
What you're doing is hyper-analyzing, scrutinizing every detail of his life looking for evidence of gay.

That's usually a bad sign, because it means you have no actual evidence so you are attempting to manufacture it.


NO ONE in here knows if this guy is gay. Its possible, maybe not, maybe he's asexual, maybe he's into goats - WE DON'T KNOW!

And we have no way of forming an opinion - your opinions are yours, we have no way of verifying what you think.

Which is a roundabout way of reinforcing that it's really not your affair at the present time, until he decides to make it so.


I will say this, having both been in the closet and out of it, the best way to find out if someone else is gay - is to be out.
 
Is it really fair to him pretending you're straight and pushing females on him? All people your age need people they can trust and people with whom they feel safe. For starters tell him to pursue fashion.
 
I have a co worker that would give you every signal of being gay. His voice, his personality, etc...But he's 18 and straight as they come. He's just not the stereotypical straight male. He listens to music that I as a gay male wouldn't listen too. In fact I listened to hardcore rap and hip-hop and I check out men and women..but I am still exclusively into men.
 
^ sha here has a point. I actually came across a guy who would caress his male friends' faces while they were having a casual chat. And as surprising as that might sound, he's straight! Some people just behave differently. I'd say don't get your hopes up.
 
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