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Is My Friend Gay or Am I Reading Too Far Into It?

A

AceofSpades6

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Hiya JUBites. I've been a lurker for a little while and finally decided to make an account.

So I am 18 and a senior in high school. I'm bi and am not out by any stretch of the imagination. I've fooled around with some of my friends in the past but never explicitly stated my sexuality.

Here's my dilemma. I have a friend who for all intensive purposes I'm going to call "Dan." Dan has been a friend of mine for the past eight or so years though we were never very close. He's a nice guy, smart, fit, and is basically a tennis prodigy. However, he's not really a ladies man. He's never actually dated a girl before. We joke about it fairly often and I constantly give him dating advice, though it doesn't appear that he takes it.

For the past year or so, our conversations have turned mainly to the topics of porn and jerking off. He apparently masturbates at least 3 times a day and his parents have caught him multiple times. A few times he's been over my house, we've watched porn on my laptop. He makes comments about his dick being bigger than the guy in the videos and has mentioned that he's uncut.

The two most recent times where we've watched porn together, I tried to push the envelope by sticking my hand in my pants. The first time I did it, he didn't seem to either notice or mind but I think I might have seen him sneaking peeks at me. Keep in mind that I didn't whip it out or jerk off. I simply had my hand in my boxers and was holding my dick.

The second time I had done the same thing as the first but his reaction was something to the extent of "WTF?" After his initial reaction, he didn't make another comment and seemed to either ignore it, or accept it.

I don't know if I'm reading into something that's not there, as this was straight porn that we were watching and I've done the same with several of my straight friends who are comfortable with their sexuality and I'm certain are not gay or bi.

So, my question is, do you guys think that Dan is gay/bi or am I looking for something that isn't there? I wouldn't mind having him as a fuck buddy or something to that effect.
 
There isn't nearly enough info for us to go off of to make a call like that. He could be a shy guy who doesn't have much luck with the ladies. if he didn't make any overtures at all after you had your hands in your pants around him twice, then i'd say he's not, but that's certainly not definitive. i'm just say'n what i think based on what you've said. :)
 
Based on his last reaction, I'd say he wasn't interested, though if gay, he is still in the closet.

I don't think there's anything read at all.
 
i dont know i wouldnt do anything to obvious but next time he talks about his penis say sonething like really..or thaats impressive...sort of opens the dialogue
 
BlondeCanadian said:
i dont know i wouldnt do anything to obvious but next time he talks about his penis say sonething like really..or thaats impressive...sort of opens the dialogue
Click to expand...

We talk about that kind of stuff pretty openly.

I'm known as the guy where no subject matter is off limits or taboo. People talk freely to me about anything, and I'm open and honest with them. The only thing I don't say is that I'm bi, rather than straight. I'm sure some of my friends have caught on, but it's not like I've said it explicitly and I have a very masculine personality which deters that type of thought. I do do a lot of "gay" things like spooning with my friends or pretend to come onto them though, but it's all done jokingly or non-sexually.
 
BlondeCanadian said:
so what did you say when he said his dick was bigger than the porn stas?
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I don't remember exactly as that was a while ago. I've been swamped with work, school, and sports, but I believe I said something along the lines of "Oh yeah? Prove it."

But it was in the joking coming-onto-him voice that I mentioned. Either he didn't take it seriously, or he might not have felt comfortable doing it at the time. Hell, I might not have necessarily felt comfortable or done it if I were him. Keeping in mind that he's a lot more prude and shy than I am, it's understandable.
 
When you're watching porn next time mention the topic of jerking off. Then tell him you like jerking and have a great technique to get yourself off. Then offer to show him.
 
All intents and purposes.

As for your friend-I don't see any indication that he's gay. Nothing definitive, anyway.
 
just talk to him about it, ask him if he is and tell him you are. i am only out to a few friends. maybe u should be too.
 
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