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Is my little brother gay

H

HappySmiles

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So, I'm 21 and I have an 11 year old brother. Every time I see him he is constantly bashing me for being gay.

I honestly laugh because he is 11, but I seriously don't know where he gets the anti-gay stuff. His friends are also pretty annoying but they know not to mess with me. It's just annoying to hear an 11 year old constantly talk about gay people and dicks.

The funny thing is that I have heard him say to my sister who is also 11 (twins) "Who do you think its cuter" while she watches whatever crap is on the tv.

He doesn't act gay at all and does the normal boy stuff with all his friends. However, he still annoys me with his anti-gay stuff.

I know its wrong but sometimes I call him a closeted fag just to laugh at him again lol
 
He's going through something called "puberty". He's genetically programmed to be an annoying little shit who's going to say everyone/everything's "gay" at this point. He'll grow out of this.

Move on with your life.
 
It's up to big brother to have a little chat 1on1, and explain a few things to let him know what is/is not right to say about things like this. You dont need to do the mom/dad part that is there right/responsiblity to do that.

But I think you can still talk to him brother to brother talk, about how these kind of things are wrong. So that he has some understanding of how not to be a bigot/ignoranant person as he gets older.
 
He doesn't understand what he is saying. But he should not be permitted to harass you. Your parents should explain to him that his taunting and derisive behavior is WRONG. Both racer2438 and nomeclature have given good advice, however, your brother should not be allowed to run amok. If you talk to him he has to be of a mind to take you seriously. I doubt that he will since he seems not to hold you in high regard. Good luck dude and don't allow this to go on for much longer.
 
I will try to talk to him even tho I can already picture him laughing at me. Its my fault also because I also tease him. Like when we were all watching tv and I called him gay for asking my sister who was the cuter guy.

I told him that asking those questions and constantly talking about dicks is pretty gay. That makes him mad and he goes on a gay rant on me.

Anyways, I will try to talk to him like an adult.
 
Often younger boys get caught up in gay bashing because they feel a psychological need to prove their emerging masculinity to their peers.

That's probably all it is really.

Tell him to stop being a fucktard.
 
cockbrain said:
If you talk to him he has to be of a mind to take you seriously. I doubt that he will since he seems not to hold you in high regard. Good luck dude and don't allow this to go on for much longer.
Click to expand...

I am going to tentatively disagree with the part in bold above. I maybe wrong, but I've got the feeling that he wants your attention, but unfortunately, the way he is getting it is by misbehaving and giving you grief.


HappySmiles said:
So, I'm 21 and I have an 11 year old brother. Every time I see him he is constantly bashing me for being gay.

I honestly laugh because he is 11, but I seriously don't know where he gets the anti-gay stuff. His friends are also pretty annoying but they know not to mess with me. It's just annoying to hear an 11 year old constantly talk about gay people and dicks.

The funny thing is that I have heard him say to my sister who is also 11 (twins) "Who do you think its cuter" while she watches whatever crap is on the tv.

He doesn't act gay at all and does the normal boy stuff with all his friends. However, he still annoys me with his anti-gay stuff.

I know its wrong but sometimes I call him a closeted fag just to laugh at him again lol
Click to expand...

Again, the part that is in bold - this seems to indicate that your parents and little sister are not saying homophobic/anti-gay things. Your brother and sister are both hitting puberty and your little brother is getting a lot of mixed messages about how and what a man is and should behave.

My suggestion is that maybe you talk with both your sister and brother (not because your sister needs it, just to make it less confrontational) and explain why homophobic slurs are inappropriate and unacceptable. And explain that the friends that they have now are not going to be the ones that they have in high school or in college or post-college, but that you will always be their big brother. I suggest trying to make it positive, and avoid calling him a "closeted fag" - if he does turn out to be gay, I bet you are the one he'd want to turn to, so don't build a divider where there doesn't have to be one. Good luck!..|
 
HappySmiles said:
I will try to talk to him even tho I can already picture him laughing at me. Its my fault also because I also tease him. Like when we were all watching tv and I called him gay for asking my sister who was the cuter guy.

I told him that asking those questions and constantly talking about dicks is pretty gay. That makes him mad and he goes on a gay rant on me.

Anyways, I will try to talk to him like an adult.
Click to expand...


Now with your post, it's more like---> Look who's calling the kettle black.. [-Xyour are both on a tit for tat. You as a the older one should have known better to begin with...[-X
 
i think it would be nice if you told him that its not ok to bash gay people, who still dont have equal rights in a lot of places, and are still beaten up, murdered, imprisoned and executed in some parts of the world. maybe you can also tell him that youre gonna be there for him, no matter what his sexual orientation turns out to be.

but of course he will laugh at you and keep acting the way he does, partly because kids that age are insuffrable, partly because he probably wants to get a reaction out of you. but that doesnt mean he didnt hear what you told him, and its important for him to hear those things.

also, crows idea about talking to both siblings to make it less confrontational is actually a good idea.

also also, stop teasing him about being gay.

is he gay? maybe, maybe not.
 
Most 11 year olds don't have a clear picture of what they want. They're sexually curious. They are awkward and insecure about their looks. They may experiment. It's a time when there are a lot of confusing things going on.

So, it may be presumptive to label the sexuality of an 11 year old. It's probably something he's trying to figure out.

And it is wrong to use words like "gay" and "fag" to tease each other... It's difficult to argue that you want to be accepted and respected if you're using homosexuality as a perjorative in your household.

You both need to agree to stop this name-calling, especially about something this serious.
 
I agree.

You both sound like you're 11 years old.

Grow up.

Help him grow up.
 
lol I know sometimes I laugh because its just so funny. Like yesterday I went over and my sister drew a picture of the whole family. Under my name it says "My gay brother." lol
 
HappySmiles said:
lol I know sometimes I laugh because its just so funny. Like yesterday I went over and my sister drew a picture of the whole family. Under my name it says "My gay brother." lol
Click to expand...

well, nothing you can do but to laugh it off.
Maybe you can think of something clever so not to call each other names.
 
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