Is this creepy?

[Rex]

Ok, I just ended my body building and conditioning class at college.

There was a really hot guy in the class. We didn't really talk much in the class though. Anyway, I went on his myspace (yeah I know that's kind of stalkerish) and even though he has a lot of homoerotic pictures, I doubt he's bi but I've learned that you never know in this day and age.

So if I sent him a message on there of me telling him I think he's hot, would that just be totally out of line and creepy?

I figure I may as well since I'll probably never see him again and what's the worst that could happen. Chances are it won't lead to anything but maybe I'll get surprised and he'd be curious or something. Who knows?

I will make sure my page is protected so if he does turn out to be some big homophobe trying to ruin me, he won't be able to contact anyone on my friends list.


So if I do this, is it just wrong or has anyone contacted someone before from their class out of the blue on face book or myspace here and it actually lead to something positive?

 

[pwrbarboy]

So if I sent him a message on there of me telling him I think he's hot, would that just be totally out of line and creepy?

It might be perceived as coming on too strong even if he is bi. Maybe you could figure out a more benign way to contact him, like offering to work out with him if he's looking for a partner. Start with a casual friendship and go from there.

 

[Rex]

So it is creepy?

I think it would be kind of odd to try and befriend him because we didn't really hang out or talk in class.

I just wanted to see what his reaction would be of me telling him I think he's hot. I'm guessing he won't reply back or think it's weird but I figure what the hell... it's worth a shot, but I don't know how that would be percieved.

I am not doing it anytime soon though. I thought I'd wait a few days.

 

[Rex]

Sounds like you already have your mind made up. What's the point in posting a thread asking for advice if you're not going to listen to any of it?

I don't, but I wanted opinions on it or to know if anyone has done that...



It might be coming on strong but I just wanted to get to the point instead of trying to befriend him, and I defenitely wouldn't have the balls to tell him something like that face to face. Especially since I don't know if he's bi or not.

It's NOT creepy. Do it.

He's probably straight though, sorry.

Probably... but if you see some of pics on myspace you'd probably think otherwise. They are so homoerotic and it got me really thinking he could be bi.

I guess it's worth a try...

 

[2243]

How did you get his myspace? If you just looked him up, found him and posted "Hey, I think you're hot", I think it would be a bit of a surprise; it could be seen as coming on strong, but not creepy.

I mean it would be creepy if you posted, "Hey, I thought you were so hot last tuesday on your second rep of pull-ups when your junk was swinging so freely.", otherwise not really. Of course, the guy could find the idea of other guys finding him attractive creepy, so there's the risk i guess.

... I doubt he's bi but I've learned that you never know in this day and age.

Good. Knowledge is Power.

 

[KyleWells]

I say go for it, you said you'd probably never see him again.
If he finds it creepy, he'll get over it. It's not like you're sending any signals that imply you're stalking him. You're just sending a message saying he's attractive.

I don't get why people are freaking out about this.

 

[giorgiobaby]

Do it, he will or will not respond

 

[2243]

This is starting to remind me of something that happened to my sister.

One day she told me this creepy guy was stalking her. She saw him at the train station and he was always staring at her even though she would ignore him. She said one time he even tried talking to her and he asked for her name and her age. She replied that if he didn't leave her alone she would call the police and she says he still looks, but he doesn't stare or talk to her anymore. A few minutes after she told me that, someone was at the door and she went to answer. It was some cute guy who had the wrong appartmen number. After he left, she said, "Why couldn't he be the one stalking me instead of that creepy perv?".

I couldn't help but just laugh.

 

[Buckley]

this is a really interesting question, sultan. it's like the new etiquette of social networking sites, and i don't think the emily post of myspace had shown up yet. on one hand, you're right -- something might not happen, but if it does, could be cool. on the other hand, the fact that it's not f2f really does make it a litlle creepy & scary.

i kept playing this over with me as your body building friend, and there were a few times i felt like 'whoa, dude thinks i'm hot, all right!' but most of the time i was like 'eeeeewwwww, i don't think so!'

i wonder, though, if you said something in your message like 'i was in that gym class with you, the guy who wore the green shorts all the time. i gotta say you're kinda hot, wanna grab coffee? hit me up,' or something, where it wasn't just random cyber(possible)weirdness, then maybe. i guess i ultimately vote for trying to catch this dude in real-life. maybe he still hangs at the gym?

 

[BabiGayPimp]

It's not a good idea, but not for the reasons you might think. Gay or straight is not the issue, context is. If you have something to tell a guy, you should tell him face to face, where you can modulate the situation. Sending a message from afar would seem rather odd, especially since you never spoke up when he was around. Next time, strike while the griddle is hot. This seems a a trail gone cold to me.

It would be different if this was an entirely cyber connection. A lot of folks are taken aback with the go on cyberspace to meet someone new and get ambushed by somone from real life.

 

[Rex]

Actually, in case you haven't done this yet. Don't. Despite the varying opinions on this bored. Writing some guy (presumably straight) out of the blue that you had a class with just to tell him you think he's hot.. is unsolicited, unwelcome and yes... creepy. Like in a make out with your sister kind of way.
Think about it.. if you did this it would be for some vague obscure hope that he'll message you back saying "OMG.. I'm totally bi.. lets fuck! I've never been with a guy and I want you to be my first"
Not going to happen. I'm being this blunt about it because I've made this mistake before. In my case it was with a guy I knew all through high school.. and I did talk to this guy, we were acquaintances. I thought I was totally in love with him and he was hawt.. and blah blah blah.. so in college I got the bright idea to email him and tell him how I felt in high school. I worded it delicately and was sure to make it very clear that I wasn't coming onto him, that I just wanted to say it out loud or whatever. Well he never wrote back. This was 10 years ago. All I got out of it was years of regret and embarrassment, because fate is vicious. I sure did run into the guy a few months later.. and you WILL run into this guy again. It sucks. Trust me.

Or don't.. and tell us all about it

Well your situation is a bit different because you knew the guy all through high school and was friends with him.

This guy is basically a stranger to me. We just had a class together and now it's over and I won't see him again so I figure what's the harm... it's true it probably won't lead to anything but meh... maybe I'll gather the balls to do it lol. I don't know yet.



PS: I'm defenitely not going to stalk the guy. I went on his myspace but I'm not going to be looking for him in the real world or anything like that.

I probably would be a surprised if someone I had a class with and we never really talked much messaged me with such a surprising thing to say but .... I wouldn't be really freaked out.

I'll wait a few days and maybe send the message. The class just ended today and I got a B.

 

[rareboy]

Yes. It would be creepy. Full stop.

 

[Rex]

Update, so I send the message a few days ago just saying he's hot and he responded today.

It wasn't creepy. He just said "thanks for the compliment but I'm straight" and then he asked me what I got in the class.

So it wasn't a big deal and I kinda knew he was probably straight but it was worth a shot.

 

[2243]

Update, so I send the message a few days ago just saying he's hot and he responded today.

It wasn't creepy. He just said "thanks for the compliment but I'm straight" and then he asked me what I got in the class.

So it wasn't a big deal and I kinda knew he was probably straight but it was worth a shot.

Exactly.

Too bad you didn't get that surprise tough it sounds like it turned out like you thought it would.

 

[rareboy]

I'll still bet the other guy was a little creeped out.

 

[spencer]

don't you wanna say something with a little more substance? you never get a 2nd chance to make a good first impression.

 

[Telstra]

from a tough guy with blood avatar to a girl avatar.

I'm confused. Prefered a non female avatar because you are not a female.
When people with female avatar i always thought i was talking to a female.

 

[Rex]

I'll still bet the other guy was a little creeped out.

He seemed fine. We got into a conversation about the class. Even if he was a little creeped out, so what?

Time to get your gaydar re-calibrated.
The current setting is too sensitive.

Anyone who sets my gaydar off I'm probably not going to be attracted to anyway. I'm not attracted to gay-ish acting guys.

 

[Antoine.]

I suggest you make another myspace account... of a guy's picture and message him saying u find him hot etc and ask if he's bisexual or gay...

this way you'll know without risking your identity...

but that's if you really wanna know. lol.

if he says he is. then message him from your real account afterwords or wtv lol

 

[Rex]

I suggest you make another myspace account... of a guy's picture and message him saying u find him hot etc and ask if he's bisexual or gay...

this way you'll know without risking your identity...

but that's if you really wanna know. lol.

if he says he is. then message him from your real account afterwords or wtv lol

I already messaged him.

You didn't read the thread.