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Just came out to my Mom

Jerry

Jerry

Here, hold this
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Well I did it folks, I told my Mom that I'm gay

Really, I told her that I "like guys" and I've met a man whom I love very much.


Now I'm kind of a pussy, so I did it via facebook PM, but I did it nonetheless.

I think I worded it fairly well although after re-reading it, I would've said some things differently.
I shared the message with only one person on this forum, and that's probably the only person who will ever see it, but I'm telling everybody that it happened.

So there it is, I did it. I told my Mom. That was a MAJOR thing for me, so we'll see what she says.

I know my Mom is pretty cool and I know she loves me, so I'm not expecting anything bad. We'll see...
 
Congrats!

But, yeah, you are a pussy. (*8*) Kidding.
 
Hope she reacts the way you expect her to. Congrats on taking this step.
 
Thanks folks.

She's almost never on facebook, I just hope she doesn't decide to check it out with my Sister or some shit hahaha

And who knows who she gave her password to to help her get started. I guess it's too late to worry about that now
 
That's why it's best to tell someone in person. You're in control.
 
Yeah but honestly, if more people find out, it'll save me the trouble.

I don't really care if my family knows anymore, I'd just rather tell them myself. But if they see it, whatever
 
Do whatever works for you. But, really, you have no control how your mother tells other people. For me, it was best to be in control of how it was presented. At least for my immediate family.
 
Congrats, it's not easy being out, with all the hate going on nowadays. But now you know you have nothing to hide. ..|
 
Lube said:
Do whatever works for you. But, really, you have no control how your mother tells other people. For me, it was best to be in control of how it was presented. At least for my immediate family.
Click to expand...

Yeah, I hear ya. My Mom is cool though, and I explained why I didn't want my other immediate family to know. I really don't think she'll betray my trust like that, but if she does then so be it. It would save me the trouble of telling them myself I guess.
I don't really care if they know. They either accept it or they don't. If they don't like it, then I won't have to worry about going to visit them. That shit is expensive anyway hahaha


Anyway thanks for the support guys, I don't think I would've ever done it if it weren't for this forum.
 
Milboy said:
I explained why I didn't want my other immediate family to know. I really don't think she'll betray my trust like that
Click to expand...
That's not what I meant. What I meant is that, by doing it yourself, in person, you control what information gets dispensed and how it's dispensed. You get to immediately answer the inevitable questions and/or prevent negative connotations from getting in the way.

For example, if you let someone else out you while you're not around, person #2 might say, "That's weird" and person #3 might feed on that (in ignorance, not meanness) and say, "Yeah, I knew this one gay guy who was so weird, everyone made fun of him" and then it might degenerate from there--because you're not there to educate them.

That's all.
 
Oh ok, I see what you're saying now.

I told her about my boyfriend, which I wasn't sure about. I mean just saying I like guys is a little different than saying I'm in love with one.

My original idea was to wait until I could take my boyfriend home to meet the family, and come out to Mom away from the rest of them. I guess I just didn't want to wait though.

But it is what it is now. If people want to think weird shit about me then so be it. Like I said, I just won't go back to visit then. I'm not big on talking to people who act like dicks, family or not.

We'll see how it plays out
 
OK, well hope it works out for the best. I take it she hasn't responded yet? Hope she reads it before you go home, LOL.
 
No, no response yet. I'm sure she'll be fine with it, but I'm still a little nervous anyway.

I probably won't be back 'home' any time soon, so I know she'll get it before I go back there. I wonder if she knows about messages though...
 
Yay milboy I'm so proud and happy for you. Don't worry I came out through text with my older sister it was just that leap and push I needed to keep coming out to everyone else. From then on no turning back and I came out to my mom in person after that.

When do you think your mom will read it? Maybe you should give her a little hint.
 
Yep I sure do, Skoot. ;) (*8*)


Well guys, Mom replied to me.

I was a little nervous when I saw the message from her, but she was as awesome as I could've ever expected.

The crazy thing was that she said she had known for a while now. I'm going to respond and ask her what made her think that, since the friend I told didn't believe me AT ALL for a while. I had to basically beat it in his head to convince him I was serious.

But like Skoot said, I guess a Mother just knows these things.


So anyway, there it is. She said she was very glad that I felt like I could trust her with what I told her, and she said she was just sad that my bf and I aren't able to be together right now. How cool is that?


Thanks to everyone who has offered me advice and kindness, both here and elsewhere in the forum. You guys rock!
 
That is AWESOME Milboy!!! (!)

And MOM'S are the BEST!!! ..|

You'll find that your life is a LOT EASIER now!!!

Congratulations on becoming YOUR OWN person!!! :=D:

:):):)
 
Congratulations! I never would have come out to my family and friends without this forum or some of the men I have met along the way.

It feels good to be out, doesnt it?

Best of luck!
 
Thanks Swerve and LFDaddy.

I live about 1300 miles away from my Mom, but I'm glad that I can finally be honest with her.

My Mom means a lot to me, so this is a very good thing.


And the funny thing is, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal now. Like why didn't I just tell her years ago? It's a good feeling.
 
This is such a wonderful story. Congratulations! I'm really very happy for you.

You're right, too, in that mothers tend to know these things. In my own experience, and the experience of many on here, the most common reaction from mothers is "I know."

I'm really happy for you! :=D:
 
Milboy said:
The crazy thing was that she said she had known for a while now.
Click to expand...

Milboy said:
And the funny thing is, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal now. Like why didn't I just tell her years ago? It's a good feeling.
Click to expand...
I wish closeted guys would read those lines over and over and over again.

Over and over and over again.

Paste them on the wall.

Sure, it's not everybody's experience, but it's quite common these days.
 
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