Brer Fox
Slut
It was like 11:50 or something. Asked her to go into the room farthest from my father who was sleeping (all the way across the house through a few doors, but nothing is far enough), and when we walked in I already felt twisted up since I never do that sort of 'I have to tell you something' routine and I could not imagine what horrors she might be envisioning.
It was pitch black and I told her to sit down and she turned on the lamp next to my chair, it felt like a spotlight. I looked to the ground and worked myself up to the point of no return and took the leap and said 'I'm gay.' Just those two words. I had spent the entire night sitting in my chair opposite her watching TV thinking up elaborate phrases, but I am sure no more than two syllables could have come out. She just responded with 'You are? What makes you think that?' to which I replied 'I just am.' This satisfied her since I was obviously sincere. I was devastated at that moment, completely frozen. It is hard for me to be so open, and I am, against my true intentions, a very proud person, and I am still a bit wobbly about being a gay man. I got tunnel vision and this gray film over my eyes and could not move, I felt like time stood still.
But then she said 'It doesn't make me love you any less' and hugged me and kissed me, and I knew she accepted me for who I was and loved me as much if not more. We talked for about an hour afterward about random stuff like we always do. I am glad I came into it friends and left friends, and I love her even more. Thank God she also emphasized that she should never tell my dad, and actually told me 'for the sake of sanity I shouldn't either.' Which is great. So now she knows and all is well and even though I felt thrashed at first I now feel elated, and free.
It was pitch black and I told her to sit down and she turned on the lamp next to my chair, it felt like a spotlight. I looked to the ground and worked myself up to the point of no return and took the leap and said 'I'm gay.' Just those two words. I had spent the entire night sitting in my chair opposite her watching TV thinking up elaborate phrases, but I am sure no more than two syllables could have come out. She just responded with 'You are? What makes you think that?' to which I replied 'I just am.' This satisfied her since I was obviously sincere. I was devastated at that moment, completely frozen. It is hard for me to be so open, and I am, against my true intentions, a very proud person, and I am still a bit wobbly about being a gay man. I got tunnel vision and this gray film over my eyes and could not move, I felt like time stood still.
But then she said 'It doesn't make me love you any less' and hugged me and kissed me, and I knew she accepted me for who I was and loved me as much if not more. We talked for about an hour afterward about random stuff like we always do. I am glad I came into it friends and left friends, and I love her even more. Thank God she also emphasized that she should never tell my dad, and actually told me 'for the sake of sanity I shouldn't either.' Which is great. So now she knows and all is well and even though I felt thrashed at first I now feel elated, and free.
That's awesome!
Congrats dude!
