Just took the first step...came out to a close friend tonight

[AussieQuattro]

I'm probably going to regret this later, but for now I feel so good. I just came out to my housemate tonight, September 18th 2010 @ 4AM!!!!...(thanks to a little SKYY). She's a really great person and I'd wanted to tell her for a while but lacked any real opportunity. She is the first I person I ever told and although I wish I had told my sister first, I feel much better now. It was tough addressing some of these topics, I couldn't even mention the word gay or say sexuality for the first part of the conversation, but as it progressed I opened up a bit more. It was just so weird hearing those words referring to me for the first time. I just hope things change for the better now. I will keep it low until I feel comfortable enough to tell all my straight guy friends, I really don't want to lose them.

I am a bit disappointed though, she said that our group of friends never had any idea I was gay which makes me sorta wish I had just kept up the act even longer. I totally thought they would've know based on all the hints I through out there. But anyways, I feel much better about it now and I know I did the right thing...it just feels so new to me. I have that exciting/sick feeling right now...like I don't know what life holds for me now. It was very emotional, but it went well I think and she is the perfect person to have come out to.

I hope I feel this good when I wake up tomorrow morning, but for now if only I could meet other masc gay guys...

 

[anchihiro]

Well done mate, hopefully everyone will be accepting, sounds like you've got a good friend.

 

[vidarr]

I wanna say congrats to you! I am a strong believer that coming out leads to a much happier life and wellbeing. I'm out to most of my family and friends. The people who matter in my life anyway... I'm sure your friend feels privelaged too being trusted with such personal information.

Hang in there and I hope your friends realise how lucky they are to know you. best wishes

 

[backpacker]

Congratulations! The first one is always the hardest. Don't feel too bad about people not picking up your hints. It's only one friend who says she had no idea and the others may suspect but not discussed it. I'm sure you will be glad once you come out to everyone.

 

[KaraBulut]

Congrats! ........

 

[bankside]

Congratulations - enjoy the freedom, and don't act for anybody unless his name is Spielberg or Cameron or something.

 

[AussieQuattro]

Thanks everyone,

I woke up with quite the headache this morning, but was surprisingly feeling much happier than what I expected...I really thought I was going to regret my decision to come out in the morning when I was thinking more "rationally". However, I felt great...still had butterflies from the conversation, but I did not regret it at all. Still sorta scary though.

It was a really hard conversation at the time, but I'm glad it happened. Lots of honesty and tears, good tears though. It feels really good to spill something you've been hiding since being a kid. I couldn't even say the words, I had to draw pictures to explain my self. It's hard saying something you've felt ashamed of for so long. Throwing light onto this issue was one of the hardest things I've ever done, I just hope it was the right thing to do in the long run.

I'm not sure what's next...but I hope it involves me meeting some new people. I have only ever met a few gay people before, or that I've known were out, and to be honest haven't really been attracted to any of them. I just hope that me being more open will allow me to meet other gay guys that I wouldn't have had the opportunity to meet. I don't know when or to whom I'll come out next, but when I do it'll be on m terms. Hopefully it was easier than the first time.