just venting, airing out, talking shit, personal beefs, problems, anger management, and etc thread

[cgymike]

Is money involved in any way?

 

[pat grimshaw]

^ i assume twinks are cute and dumb. Just like Tinkerbell

 

[refujiunderground]

my laziness has no bounds. i've sat here literally looking at the same three sites for the past 3 hours. all i do all day is wake up, eat, jerk off, take a shit, shower, and on mondays, wednesdays, and fridays, go to the gym. this is pathetic. when i was working, i would just go to work on the weekends. smh. i still can't get myself up to get out of my room and take a shower. applied to some jobs today, looking for work, i should be studying the LSAT right now, was about to but i don't feel like it.

hell, i have the urge to piss but i'm too lazy to get up to head to the bathroom which is only just steps away.

once again, i didn't do anything today and i don't even feel bad or care for that matter. i should be feeling bad and embarrassed but it's like whatever. i'm acting like a bum because if you kick me out of here, i am one.

 

[cgymike]

Has people's personal space expanded in the past few years? What's the deal with everyone saying "excuse me" when you are 10 feet away from them. Is this something to do with overusage of smartphones? Next time I am going to get withing 2 feet of them and see what happens!

 

[Lefty]

@huntneo...

well old pard, from time to time you do get a bit opinionated...not that I
would ever be guilty of doing something like that...

OH???
This is a discussion forum with people having opinions and stuff???

{was that subtle enough?)

Fuji you will spend the next three days studying and a trip to the gym
and sorting Job Applicant clothes to wear Monday. You will get that stanky
ass in the shower and scrub it all from that thick head to the bottoms of
those flat feet.

Do you get the picture? If you fail to comply Don 'Q' and and Sixthson
down to give you a serious taking too.

lol guys...it takes players to have a game...

 

[bankside]

When I've been at the supermarket lately--I WISH people would give me more personal space when standing in line. I swear I'm waiting to check out--and the person behind is practically fucking me at the register! And even worse--it's usually women!

LOL at "usually women."

SHE can step off! Her too… And you. He's okay. But go gentle.

 

[cgymike]

When I've been at the supermarket lately--I WISH people would give me more personal space when standing in line. I swear I'm waiting to check out--and the person behind is practically fucking me at the register! And even worse--it's usually women!

Wow - maybe I have bad body odour but people give me space at the checkout. The picture you paint sounds like a nighmare

 

[Anders123]

I mean, I know we can't all be friends here--but I don't get it. If you're going to outright dislike me...please give me the chance to do something to piss you off BEFORE you start being a shady dick to me.

Then again--maybe they just find me annoying. who knows? lol

I think on a public forum especially, developing an opinion of another member doesn't really require personal interaction. It's probably not going to be a hugely accurate assessment of character, but you can get a pretty decent idea of what a person is like just from reading their posts. I think many just make the mistake of disliking those who uphold opinions contrary to their own, or of opting to perceive disagreements as personal attacks. It can get pretty catty around these parts, which is a shame. I'm sure if people could just let go of their hasty judgments, they might find a new friend or two.

Also, it doesn't really matter how agitating a person can be, there are a million better and more productive ways to express anger outside of being a shady dick. There's really no justification for it, it's just being an asshole.

 

[refujiunderground]

i'm really, really pissed off right now so since this thread was made for this purpose...

I AM PISSED OFF RIGHT NOW WITH MYSELF, THE PEOPLE AROUND ME AND MY LIFE.

yeah, yeah, i should appreciate my life or whatever the fuck. i don't care about all that shit.

to think that my black ass was thinking about how my attitude i reached it's peak back in high school where i was spazzing off on anybody that got me mad. i used to throw a hissy fit, cursing and the whole nine on the lunch line, to the lunch lady and the whole nine when i was pissed. i only made myself look like an ass when i thought that the whole "i'm not taking shit from anybody" attitude was working. i was feeling a bit remorseful thinking about it this morning and was like wow... what the fuck is wrong with me? seriously. why did i act like that? you know, i was thinking to myself that i really needed to look at myself then and now and see if i made any importants since that 10 year gap. i really needed to change and still have to make some changes. thought about the things that i needed in my life right now the most and i'll tell you right now, a boyfriend isn't one of them.

but anyways, i woke up this morning and i was getting mad at myself for how fucked up i continue to allow myself to be. i am holding myself back and basically programming myself to have a nervous breakdown, kill myself or to end up getting in trouble with the law. you know, i was getting angry with myself when i was thinking... "why the fuck can't i simply just close the curtains to block off the light that is blinding me and keeping me from falling back asleep at 6 in the morning? oh yeah, because if you do, your intelligence will diminish and you'll be a depressed retard like how you were feeling back in high school. keep those blinds open. it's vital for your well being." my whole anxiety is fucking killing me. my whole thought process is fucked up and when i say fucked up, i'm not talking about something that i can brush off, my way of thinking has fucked up my life and is making it even worse.

like i seriously think bad things will happen to me if i simply let go of something such as closing the curtains to keep the light outside my room to help me sleep or that i'll go nuts if i don't sit up on my bed looking like a dog, staring up at the clock with a question coming across my head raising up a concern of mine. i'm all looking at the last digits and thinking to myself that the clock actually has more fucking sense and brains than i do. same thing with the colors of cars and etc. my confidence is shot to the point where i'm placing my value and judgement on fucking superstitution and irrationality. i seriously am living my life around that shit and i think that it's okay.

the thing that angers me the most is that as a kid, i've been living in a situation where i've had issues BUT the thing is nobody bothered to give a fuck enough to at least reach out to me to fucking help me. i've been forced to for a long time have to be by my fucking self where i've had to deal with them on my own fucking two. i've been told that there's "nothing wrong with me" and "that i'm looking for problems" why i act the way i act. they say i want attention or have adjustment issues or whatever. it's as if they can't see that in itself is a problem. i've pretty much had to deal with myself, not even knowing why i act a certain way and how i can snap myself out of that fucking mindstate. so i've been told to basically hide how i feel or hide the fact that i have problems because nobody around me gave a fuck enough to step up and go "okay, something's wrong here". so i grow up, continuing to fuck myself over and having more issues with myself and my life and then i get told by the same people the same fucking bullshit that i was told as a kid. now i realize that they were fucking wrong and that the red flags were being ignored because they were either too scared to do something about it or they didn't give a fuck. then to top it off, i find myself caught up in my parents' bullshit marriage. i grew up in a fucking unstable household where my mother was basically the caregiver, my father basically did whatever the hell he felt like not thinking about his wife or his sons, and then seeing this emotional tug-o-war. my parents basically fighting and arguing with each other in front of us. my mother basically keeping us and herself in a bad situation simply because she was scared to get herself out of it as well as us. she wanted us to have a father and she didn't think she had what it took to take care of us by herself. so what happens, she prolongs the situation and then WE get caught up in it. like it's not my fucking fault. it pisses me off whenever i hear how she talks about "you guys do this. you guys do that. your father throws this around or does what he feels like so it's his fault as well as you and your brother's for why my life is a living hell." like i know i fuck up around here too and give you stress that you don't need to top off the issues you're dealing with or put yourself into but don't blame me for what the fuck my father does. you put yourself in that situation and ME into it too. you dealt with the man for 30 years and even single time i talk to you about him, how you should just let go of the thing that's been kicking your ass for the longest time, you talk to me about "he never used to be this way. he used to be a nice man then his friend's made him fucked up". it's NOT his friends. he been fucked up. even his own damn half brother and his wife warned you about how fucked up he was. you were warned about him and you let your fear hold you back. you basically are blaming me for your fucking situation. IT'S NOT MY FUCKING FAULT. I HAVE ENOUGH SHIT TO DEAL WITH DEALING WITH MYSELF. I WILL NOT FURTHER DRAG MYSELF DOWN BECAUSE YOU AND SOME OF THESE OTHER PEOPLE AROUND ME WANT ME TO BE FUCKED UP.

even hearing my father walk around, i really don't like his ass. he's just a fucked up human being. i'm tired of having to deal with this unstable ass atmosphere where i know what's exactly going to happen. seeing a sick mentally ill man who seems only fucking interested in taking care of his own ass and hearing his fucking self and seeing a woman with anxiety issues who needs to go to a fucking psychologist to see that she's been kicking herself in the ass and both of them are making my brother and me, especially, into some fucking nutjobs. for real, if i keep going down on this route, i'll be either dead or in jail. i'm getting angry to the point where i really am not beginning to give a fuck anymore and might end up going off and hurting somebody. that's exactly how i felt when i was up this morning. i felt like slitting my wrist, blowing my head off or fucking going on a shooting spree.

 

[sixthson]

There are two or three members here who I KNOW do not care for me. And if I'm recalling correctly--they have no reason to.

I mean, I know we can't all be friends here--but I don't get it. If you're going to outright dislike me...please give me the chance to do something to piss you off BEFORE you start being a shady dick to me.

Then again--maybe they just find me annoying. who knows? lol

If everyone liked you, it would be a sure sign you are doing something WRONG. Personally, I don't want to be liked by some people. It's not about my disagreeing with someone about their opinions, either. I have certain values and if someone holds absolutely contrary ones, we are not going to be compatible. If they hate me, that is fine by me and I wear their contempt as a badge of honor.
People like that are why the word "meh" was created.

 

[ChickenGuy]

refuji, you're caught in a spiral where your OCD and your mood swings and your social isolation all feed off one another and exacerbate each other, and so it goes round and round and round and round....

....then your anger needs a channel and you need to vent and so you shoot your mouth off and say some VERY inadvisable things like your last sentence, which I'm sure you don't really mean but is just immense frustration and annoyance boiling over (I hope)

This is probably not much comfort to you but these strong emotions DO ease over time, in my case at say age 17-22 it wasn't anger but it was an INTENSE crush on a friend and then a college guy I barely knew let alone spoke with, combined with an equally INTENSE self-HATRED of myself.

Two things to do are - first, to find ways if you haven't already of relaxing and de-stressing whether that be music or playing computer games or going out for walks or whatever, and - second, to try and 'break' gently these compulsive habits if not the obsessive ones which I was never able to control, I just had to endure. With greater insight over time, these issues became at the very least 'known' as opposed to saying 'what the fuck am I thinking about' which was the WORST thing - when they're the great unknown monsters in the room.

I'm sure sometimes you feel like the loneliest guy in the planet when you're suffering through all of this bullshit nonsense in your head and having to do it in silence, but one big positive is that you've found this place which means you have a very helpful link to the outside world beyond the realms of your house and the four walls of your room.

It takes time, but eventually you'll gain the independence and presence of mind to better control all the bad stuff, and if you ever get an opportunity for e.g. travel, or meeting someone new, or anything that 'changes the script' then take it!

 

[Lefty]

Fuji,

You thought maybe the chicken guy and me was gonna have some words...Nae,

but I tell you three (03) times bro...

read/ think hard on what this Scot/UK transplant has to say...

CG's not just clucking, he's been in a similar situation to you and lived to tell about it

btw, if I miss...great Thanksgiving time for you and everyone.​

 

[refujiunderground]

refuji, you're caught in a spiral where your OCD and your mood swings and your social isolation all feed off one another and exacerbate each other, and so it goes round and round and round and round....

pretty much and it's messing me up. sometimes, i feel like this is literally making me go crazy. i'm starting to get a bit paranoid where i'll experience that eerie disassociation feeling randomly because i feel stressed out. used to only just experience that smoking weed. now it's happening with the drugs.

....then your anger needs a channel and you need to vent and so you shoot your mouth off and say some VERY inadvisable things like your last sentence, which I'm sure you don't really mean but is just immense frustration and annoyance boiling over (I hope)

yeah, that's pretty much it but i'll admit, i really do feel like doing that sometimes. over the years, i've come to my senses where i'm realizing that the way i'm going about it is all wrong. i was in my teenage phrase trying to be cool acting like i was a street thug where i thought guns and drugs were cool. some years later, i realize that that's not what i want to be associated with. don't like guns, i don't want to hurt people, don't like the idea of having to smoke weed to get myself away from reality because i hate it and all these problems. would rather just be happy and be in total peace.

This is probably not much comfort to you but these strong emotions DO ease over time, in my case at say age 17-22 it wasn't anger but it was an INTENSE crush on a friend and then a college guy I barely knew let alone spoke with, combined with an equally INTENSE self-HATRED of myself.

hopefully, they do. this is just torture. it's been happening for years now. sometimes, i think this is going to last the rest of my life where the result is i'm still stuck at home living with my parents when i'm 30 or worst yet 40.

Two things to do are - first, to find ways if you haven't already of relaxing and de-stressing whether that be music or playing computer games or going out for walks or whatever, and - second, to try and 'break' gently these compulsive habits if not the obsessive ones which I was never able to control, I just had to endure. With greater insight over time, these issues became at the very least 'known' as opposed to saying 'what the fuck am I thinking about' which was the WORST thing - when they're the great unknown monsters in the room.

i should travel a bit more. one thing for sure is that i enjoy being able to drive to whereever to get away from the area that i'm in. seeing different things is cool. routine on the other hand sucks. as for the compulsive thoughts. would say that dealing with right now, it's very annoying. it actually upsets me at the thought of just wanting to change something over once but i know that the anxiety will overcome me to the point where i'll revert to it. like i would love to just close the blinds right now and keep them close BUT i can't seem to get myself to do it. the last time i did it, the feeling of sadness just came and i started to feel stupid. same thing with looking at the clock. it's that horrible feeling of something going away.

I'm sure sometimes you feel like the loneliest guy in the planet when you're suffering through all of this bullshit nonsense in your head and having to do it in silence, but one big positive is that you've found this place which means you have a very helpful link to the outside world beyond the realms of your house and the four walls of your room.

very true.

It takes time, but eventually you'll gain the independence and presence of mind to better control all the bad stuff, and if you ever get an opportunity for e.g. travel, or meeting someone new, or anything that 'changes the script' then take it!

hopefully so.. i most definitely would take the opportunity to do anything that changes the script in a heartbeat.

thanks for your wonderful advice and help, man.

 

[refujiunderground]

Fuji,

You thought maybe the chicken guy and me was gonna have some words...Nae,

but I tell you three (03) times bro...

read/ think hard on what this Scot/UK transplant has to say...

CG's not just clucking, he's been in a similar situation to you and lived to tell about it

btw, if I miss...great Thanksgiving time for you and everyone.​

hope you have a great thanksgiving day too. don't eat too much turkey now.

 

[refujiunderground]

There are two posters here I used to like, and now I just want to take their heads and bump them together, 80's pro-wrestling style, for being shallow cock-ends.

is one of those posters me????

 

[ChickenGuy]

I love Lefty's big pic of that rooster.

@ChickenGuy:

Would that be a Plymouth Rock chicken? They've become uncommon here in the US, along with almost every other breed besides Cornish Cross....

"We didn't land on Plymouth Rock, Plymouth Rock landed on us!"


That's the only time I've heard that phrase. I'm afraid I'm no expert on chicken breeds.

But I don't see these striped black/white types in the U.K. - I've only seen them on U.S. TV progs.

The standard British breed is brown, usually a mixture of mostly dark/reddish with a bit of light tan/biege.

thanks for your wonderful advice and help, man.

Kisses and cuddles for refuji!

 

[Nishin]

I've had some "I can't believe that just happened" moments, too, especially at the Self-Checkout. Nowadays, people will walk right past you and grab the register, never mind the queue.

When that happens, I get so angry that I don't know how to act. Don't they teach manners anymore? And lest anybody think: not only young people do this--I've watched people older than myself do it.

You get the feeling that our zeitgeist has begun to change.

I hate when people do that... even I who suck at social conventions know to respect lines and other people' time

 

[Lefty]

hope you have a great thanksgiving day too. don't eat too much turkey now.

Not to worry my friend,

I eat so much Crow

here most of the time
that there is no room for turkey ...

or beef either. lol

@JohannB...that is actually a for real Scots breed of Chicken in that
other pic...I spent 20 bloody minutes hunting one up​

 

[refujiunderground]

for the first time in a long time, I AM VERY HAPPY. VERY, VERY HAPPY! there's no reason to why i'm happy either. I AM JUST HAPPY BECAUSE I FEEL HAPPY. i don't need anything good to happen to me to feel happy. i'm not bipolar or mood swinging or whatever. i need to masturbate though. my dick feels wonderfully great. i need to beat it out to some more pornography.

 

[Lefty]

You might go to GGG's Appreciation thread in F&G,

there are some mildly suggestive photos there tonight.

Hope everything comes out ok...

Glad to hear you found the zone.

Keep the roadmap.