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just venting, airing out, talking shit, personal beefs, problems, anger management, and etc thread

  • Thread starter Thread starter refujiunderground
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jesus fucking christ I have to pee.

left my house at 10 am thinking the contractors working in my bathroom would be gone when I got home at 4-5 pm, but they're still here.

glad they're working hard to get finished, but I'm ready to try pissing into the basement sink at this point.

Find someone with a pee fetish and use them as a receptacle.
 
I CAN'T STAND it when I am browsing for porn and stumble across what would otherwise be a seriously HOT VIDEO, but the video quality is absolutely shitty and/or the participants don't know how to film and fuck for the best angles of all the action.

:dead:

this girl spent about 10 mins riding her boyfriend in cowgirl with the boyfriend's head facing the camera. Then she complains that the penetration can't be seen. :dead:

bitch...seriously? you both are facing the wrong way. I just can't with crap porn.

also...another thing I get when watching straight vids sometimes... I wanted to see more of the bf's butt, but the girlfriend was all up in the camera. buzz off! :lol:

I don't even know why people even bother to upload stuff if its crap.
 
I CAN'T STAND it when I am browsing for porn and stumble across what would otherwise be a seriously HOT VIDEO, but the video quality is absolutely shitty and/or the participants don't know how to film and fuck for the best angles of all the action.

:dead:

this girl spent about 10 mins riding her boyfriend in cowgirl with the boyfriend's head facing the camera. Then she complains that the penetration can't be seen. :dead:

bitch...seriously? you both are facing the wrong way. I just can't with crap porn.

also...another thing I get when watching straight vids sometimes... I wanted to see more of the bf's butt, but the girlfriend was all up in the camera. buzz off! :lol:

LOL HAHAHAH that is just like my guy…you have the same hatred for badly filmed and directed porn.
 
Hi Borgie...

Not good on the imagination track today?

Try this...
weed-1.jpg


and then picture it again...http://youzzz.com/imag/img/683.jpg


lol...hi old bud
 
I'm getting fucked tomorrow! I'm hooking up with my best bud!
 
i haven't shown up to that group therapy in two weeks. honestly, that shit doesn't fucking work. the hell am i getting up at 11am for to be in a group for an hour. that ain't shit helping me. fuck all that. it doesn't seem like the counselors or the people in that hospital are concerned with giving me the resources to help anyway
You never managed to get past the group therapy (which is basically USELESS shit), and into individual therapy? (And what about the other people in the group - are they also people who really should have individual therapy as well? Or are you thrown into that group only because some bigwig accountant or CEO is looking only at the bottom line of profit?) This country is so backwards on some of this stuff. It may not be a panacea, but they aren't even allowing you to TRY the thing that very often helps/works.

My mind is saying that I want to take you to some places, and be a second person who is speaking up, and hoping to find some of those hidden doors leading to what you really want (and need). Yes I'm still hoping to do a trip as mentioned to you some time ago, but I haven't said much recently because my first trimester is the busiest time of the year.

The utmost of (*8*) to you, too.
 
You never managed to get past the group therapy (which is basically USELESS shit), and into individual therapy? (And what about the other people in the group - are they also people who really should have individual therapy as well? Or are you thrown into that group only because some bigwig accountant or CEO is looking only at the bottom line of profit?) This country is so backwards on some of this stuff. It may not be a panacea, but they aren't even allowing you to TRY the thing that very often helps/works.

My mind is saying that I want to take you to some places, and be a second person who is speaking up, and hoping to find some of those hidden doors leading to what you really want (and need). Yes I'm still hoping to do a trip as mentioned to you some time ago, but I haven't said much recently because my first trimester is the busiest time of the year.

The utmost of (*8*) to you, too.

that's the only option they're giving me at the moment even when i called the intake person and even talked to the shrink who actually left a message to the intake person. it's been about 3 months since i heard from her. they just simply wrote me off to lower their case work and they could care less. apparently, that's the norm for that hospital with the patients. just let them take the pills, go to some group sessions and that's that.

even though there's some benefits here and there seeing these folks at that hospital, i'm beginning to realize that with the exception of the ocd being under control. things are pretty much the same as they were the last time. that counts as something i guess even if everything isn't the way i want them to go. 1 out of 10 things is something compared to nothing.

i really dunno anymore to tell you the truth. the next option would be for them to hospitalize me and i'm nowhere near that point.
 
So, I've been dating this woman. We met in Toronto. She moved to San Diego. Long story short she told me she had cancer. So, being the good boyfriend, I called her hospital. And...well. No record of a patient with her name. Extraordinarily offended, as she knew I wanted a career in surgical oncology and cancer was a sensitive topic. And she deleted her Facebook/Twitter and won't answer texts now. Think I'm done with women. This is the third psycho, and I am only 22.
 
So, I've been dating this woman. We met in Toronto. She moved to San Diego. Long story short she told me she had cancer. So, being the good boyfriend, I called her hospital. And...well. No record of a patient with her name. Extraordinarily offended, as she knew I wanted a career in surgical oncology and cancer was a sensitive topic. And she deleted her Facebook/Twitter and won't answer texts now. Think I'm done with women. This is the third psycho, and I am only 22.

Psycho? Maybe. But I think it's more likely that she didn't want a long distance relationship or found someone else, and was too chickenshit to tell you upfront.
 
I don't know. All of her friends are deactivating their accounts. Starting to think her entire life was an elaborate hoax. If I hadn't actually met her, I'd think she was some basement dweller playing me. By friends I mean other identities. Never met the friends.
 
I don't know. All of her friends are deactivating their accounts. Starting to think her entire life was an elaborate hoax. If I hadn't actually met her, I'd think she was some basement dweller playing me. By friends I mean other identities. Never met the friends.

Sounds like she was "catfishing", where you make up fake online identities in order to bolster your lies ("I'm totally straight - just check out my girlfriends' Tumblr page!" or "Of course I'm a model. Here's the Facebook page of my agency!")
 
RJ, you can write your morning pages any old time.

It's true that it works best in the morning...but a lot of people can't manage it. I myself never write them in the morning; I usually do it at night.

About the therapy..

...I agree with Frank. I think therapy works best for people who have gone through a great trauma, like a divorce, or a crime victim, etc.

I don't think it works at all for people with a brain chemistry situation. I honestly don't think it will work at all for you.

I do think individual therapy might help you relate to your family a little better, but it ain't gonna do squat for your OCD and depression. In my humble opinion.

Group therapy is a waste of time, imho.

I was reading your words, and actually it seems like that you know yourself pretty well. It sounds like you have very successfully analyzed your situation, and all of the dymamics leading to it.

If while you do your morning pages, you get a flash of inspiration--any sudden urges--listen to them. For example, suddenly you might get an idea out of the blue to go apply for work at Acme Inc. If you do, I'd strongly urge you to follow through. Your subconscious mind is speaking to you, and if you'll listen to it, it can help you.

Good luck to you man.

that's the annoying thing about morning pages. always having to remember writing into it in the morning. there's been a few times where i almost got to write them for the day and i'm trying not to skip any days. so far 38 or 39 days straight and counting. (!)

as for therapy, reading what you and frankfrank said, i'm beginning to contemplate on whether i should go this week or not. the thing is i dunno what might happen if i decide to no longer show up because to be honest with you, i don't feel like being there anymore. at first, it was cool but now, it's feels like a chore. don't really walk away with anything except some fresh air in the morning. might just stop coming altogether without telling them and only showing up to the shrink appointments.

well, i haven't really got a sudden urge to do something like that while doing the morning pages. if there was one, it was to do something like job hunting or to masturbate. :(

some good news though. i just shedded my labcorp bill that i've been owning for some months now. it feels good to pay bills and having to tell these damn money hungry, greed ass corporations to fuck off. the next step is to pay back direct loans. whether it's a year or 20 years from now, if i live long enough to see that debt go down to nothing after paying them back, i will tell them to kiss my ass and to go fuck themselves off too because i will no longer owe them shit. there's nothing more satisifying than paying a bill and looking into somebody's face knowing that they can't tell you shit about oweing them anything. that's one thing that i hate. oweing people money. anything that makes me feel like i'm a slave or being controlled by somebody where i have to feel somebody breathing over my neck. fuck that shit. i am all for reality and dreaming as well.

one of the worst things is having to do something for money when you have no options. it fucking sucks. i hate having to be on my knees basically doing whatever to survive or to have some money to my name. it just feels shameful. as crazy and stupid as this sounds, i would rather sell drugs on the corner than to work at somewhere like taco hell again. working every two weeks and then making enough money where i have to manage it, then knowing that what i'm doing is not going to look good on my resume where employers won't take me seriously. then to top it off, these employers are acting like straight up bitches going like "we want people that have experience in the positions that we're offering" and the damn job isn't even fucking difficult. man, i was thinking about being a cop BUT fuck that. my heart isn't gear towards that line of work. i want to do something more than that so that's why i now want to go to law school. i feel that i would make more of an impact towards someone's life than telling people what to do and being a bully with a badge being told what to do, how i should dress, that i have to shave, that i have to shine my shoes or whatever the fuck. HELL NO. i would rather practice law than to enforce it.
 
^I have a couple of ideas that might be worth mulling over, RJ.

(First: have you written your morning pages tonight? ;) BTW, I wonder where you stand on the 750words website? I bet you're way up there in the rankings.)

Anyway...

...I take it that you have some kind of law degree, and eventually want to be a cop? Well, why not apply for a security guard situation at a mall, or at a bank? It'll at leat get your feet in the door. After you get X amount of experience, then you can go somewhere with it.

...the other thing I see is that obviously you like to type words. That might open up some kind of angle, too. I haven't been in the job market for a long time now, but do any of the jobs offered require typing abilities? I remember years and years ago applying for a job that required phone service and good typing skills. I think the job was for an insurance adjuster, or some such. I blew off the interview because it required a 9:00am interview (and I'm a major night person), otherwise I believe I'd certainly have gotten the job.

The only reason I'm pushing this is that I think it would be good for your self-esteem, RJ. Unemployed people often feel useless--that's quite normal. Their self-esteem skyrockets when they get a job, and yours will, too.

...

EDIT: Oh, I see. You said you DIDN'T want to be a cop. Sorry, I misread.

i was actually in the process of trying to get a job in a law office that involved typing up documents but apparently, things didn't work out because they didn't call me back. :( still looking around though.
 
@RJ: is becoming a paralegal an option for you?

In some places, they have a shortage of paralegals.

i'd have to go back to school again to get certified. paralegal most definitely is an option though but my main goal is to be a lawyer. that's like the mountain top. honestly, i know i need a job asap but at the same time, i'm really beginning to look @ the long con instead of a temporary comfort. if i do decide to become a paralegal instead, it won't stop me from shooting for law school.
 
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