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Life Kind of Sucks... Just a Little.

deelong

deelong

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Okay, so I'm sure there has been millions of thread like this. But, I honestly have no one to talk to this about except you all. So here it goes.

I think I'm going through a small depression at the moment. My life sucks. I think the main reason why I'm starting to become depressed is because I wasn't able to go to school this year. Which really pisses me off. All of my friends, are in college. And I'm the only one at home doing almost jack shit. I had a plan when I was in high school, that I was for sure going to college. There was no doubt in my mind. But my plan turned to shit, when I found out I wasn't able to receive any financial aid, and my parents weren't going to help me out. Which is terrific.

And then there's another issue that I'm having with myself. I have this increasing feeling of loneliness. I'm 19 years old, and I've never had a boyfriend. Since I have so much time to kill now, I want someone I could be really close with and love. I've been on an app called Jack'd for over a year, almost a year and a half. I always get messages from guys. But most of them don't strike my attention. The last time a guy caught my attention was almost a year ago. I really liked him. He was my ideal man. But he wasn't really interested in dating, he just wanted to fuck, and that's it. I constantly think about him, and what it would be like if we actually did date. I sound crazy, but I can't help it. Most of the guys that are on there are incapable of holding a decent conversation. There was actually one guy one there who was around my age. He was pretty cool. I stated twice that I was only looking for friends at the moment. We were talking for a while, then we decided to meet up and hang out as friends. I asked what he wanted to do, and he said, "You can come over to my place, we can hangout and cuddle". That kind of throw me off. I told him that I wasn't really comfortable with that because I wanted to be friends with him. and he just said, "Oh...". But I gave him a second chance. Yesterday we were suppose to hangout after I got off of work. Honestly, I wasn't feeling it anymore. So, I cancelled on him.

I just have a hard time figuring out what's wrong with me. I can't find anyone even on a friendship basis. Most of them, I tell them I want friends. Then later in the conversation, they say to me that they want to do something sexual. I truly, want to find a boyfriend. But I guess there's no one out there for me.

I even go on craigslist for hookup, which I'm really not into. But I think I do it, because I do feel lonely. And at the moment I think that 15 or so of sex is better than nothing.

I just need some type of advise. I would really appreciate it, If you guys could help me with my little problem. I hate feeling like this. Thank you =)
 
apps are really for hookups. not for b/f material. same with craigslist.. its all about sex. you might want to try lgbt groups to find guys to date.
 
I think your focus really needs to be on your education now. Have you checked into federal Pell grants? Would you consider a junior college for two years? I think you will find going to college will present you will ways to meet other guys, too. You would kill two birds with one stone that way. I don't know anything about dating or hook up sites, but lots of other JUBbers have your same complaints, so I am sure they will be along soon to give you their advice.
Additionally, I don't really think you are in depression as much as just being down about life right now. Don't sink into self pity. Are you working? Are you being productive in other areas of your life?
 
Second the advice about the apps. If you're looking for Mr. Right, you'd do better looking somehwhere the other guys aren't looking for Mr. Right-Now. As for school, well, life is what happens while we're busy making plans. Use this time to work and save up money, and to volunteer in an area that clicks with your eventual career goal. This will make your application to college more appealing to the admissions folks. Also, use the time to research financial aid options, either through your local public library or the finanacial aid office at the college you hope to attend. Meantime, why not take some general ed classes at the local junior college? It should be fairly economical, and you'll rack up some credits so you don't have to pay out for university so long.

Good luck! :)
 
sixthson said:
I think your focus really needs to be on your education now. Have you checked into federal Pell grants? Would you consider a junior college for two years? I think you will find going to college will present you will ways to meet other guys, too. You would kill two birds with one stone that way. I don't know anything about dating or hook up sites, but lots of other JUBbers have your same complaints, so I am sure they will be along soon to give you their advice.
Additionally, I don't really think you are in depression as much as just being down about life right now. Don't sink into self pity. Are you working? Are you being productive in other areas of your life?
Click to expand...

I agree, my sister is going to help me out with fafsa. And my Dad told me the a couple of days ago, that if something goes wrong. Then, he will cosign on a loan for me, which is great. So, I'm sure I'll be in school by the Fall of 2013.

And I agree with you, I wouldn't say it's a depression. My life is just a little down at the moment. I am working. It's only part-time though. There's not much to do where I live, at least nothing that I know of. I live about an hour away from Chicago. I've never heard of a LGBT center in Chicago. I'll research and see what I can find. I was trying to find another job, to kill time and save up some more money. But that hasn't been very successful. Thanks for the advise.
 
There's a very active community center in Chicago.

I'm glad you're finding a way to get to school. Be sure to set up an appointment with a financial aid counselor to get the latest information on what is available. Oftentimes there are scholarships that go unclaimed.

You're correct to separate the various elements of your life and not tie them all together. A lot may be coming at you at once but they are separate things with separate solutions. Stay positive whenever possible.
 
So many live individual lives, though married.

It's so hard to find another to share life with, and that's what you long for.

You are kind of young to yearn so hard. What is IS. Who you meet along the way who has potential rarely exists on Craigslist (it can happen, but really... have you won the lottery lately, then don't bother there)

Hope you find something better than most marriages, clearly you need and deserve that, A PARTNER IN LIFE, LIVING, BEING.
 
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