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Long Distance relationships

Twisly

Twisly

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Hello my fellow JUBers! I just wanted to know what are your opinion(s) regarding long distance relationship. Coz am on it right now... and it really sucks... am scared that I might loose that *magic* cause we seldom see each other. Which means we seldom do IT.

Have you been into a long distance relationship? What are the problems you've encountered? How do you resolve it?

Thanks!
 
I was hoping there was an answer to your question. I have spent about a year on a long distance relationship and have begun to realize it can't work out. I think I need someone within touching distance.
 
My relationship began long distance in January 1997; on December 18, 2007 we will be celebrating living together in a loving committed relationship for nine years

So, yeah, it can work. We both knew what we wanted and set a time line as to when the long distance portion would end. We spoke on the phone just about every day and got together about every five weeks

It isn't easy but it can be done
 
I think long distance relationships work, but depending on the person, they can basically cheat on you, or fool around with other guys and not tell you. Its just like a real relationship, but with this you really don't know what the other guy in the relationship is doing. I've been in a long distance relationship and it I got dumped.
 
I have had three in my lifetime - with three distinct scenarios:

(1) It started online and ended online. In the span of a year's relationship, we saw each other in person twice. I was happy to end that train wreck. We never spoke again and I personally never want to.

(2) Started online, met in person and continued long distance for 2 years with the understanding that I would be relocating back to him after I finished school. Moved back and the relationship lasted 3 more years until it broke up unrelated to long distance. Though we're the best of friends today.

(3) Started in person and continued that way for 2 years, then he moved away to go back to school. Continued long distance for a year after which the relationship died a horrible death - but we're still friends.

So the moral of my story? If there is no expectation or plan of a future together, it's not worth it. It is only worth it if the distance is temporary and you BOTH work on keeping the relationship alive while you're apart. That means communication, frequent personal contact and above all, trust.
 
RicanDAB said:
So the moral of my story? If there is no expectation or plan of a future together, it's not worth it. It is only worth it if the distance is temporary and you BOTH work on keeping the relationship alive while you're apart. That means communication, frequent personal contact and above all, trust.
Click to expand...

This is definitely what made our relationship work. We started in Jan 1997 and said we'd give it a year. He moved in Dec 1997 and the rest is history

I remember in the summer of 1997 he had a desire to stay where he was for one more year because of a chorus he was involved in. I told him I couldn't endure one more year of long distance - nor could I afford all the flights. He chose me over the chorus and it all worked out
 
I had one and did not work.

We started about a month before he graduated from college. He moved, but we still talked a lot. We saw eachother every couple of weeks, but each time it was less interesting. We both decided to end it, and now we are really close friends.

What I learned?

You can have very intense phone sex! haha
 
I'm in one at the moment. We met about 18 months ago and 9 months ago he had to move to Melbourne to complete the studies that will give him access to permanent residency in Australia. It is working and in one week today he returns to Brisbane. We keep in touch by texting each other most days and travelling to see each other approx. every 4-5 weeks. The internet and cheap air fares have made it much easier than it would have been 10 years ago. Having said that I think a LDR will only work if it has a definite time to end the seperation and should not drag on more than a year. If the seperation has no fixed ending you realy probably should be looking to move to wherever he is living,otherwise you will grow apart!Good luck, by the way, hope it is going OK!(*8*)
 
I've been through enough of them to be cautious in the future :\
 
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