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Looking for first time with another guy, but I need help...

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Apr 8, 2010
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Hey all,
I'm looking for some advice. Actually, maybe it's more like strategy! I've always considered myself straight but have wanted to try something with a guy for a long time. In the past I have always turned down the opportunity for one reason or another (not my type, we knew too many people mutually, etc.) until I met this guy at my workout class. He was very straight-acting, which I prefer, and I wouldn't have had a clue he was gay if I hadn't found his facebook profile!

It didn't take too long for me to pick up the signals that he was interested (I'm somewhat of a looker, haha) but I was a little too shy to reciprocate in such a public setting, so I think he wrote me off as just another straight guy and moved on. I was planning to give him a pleasant surprise though. I would soon be moving out of my place that I shared with 2 roommates and into a place of my own. I decided that I'd wait until I was in my new place so we could be alone. But, as luck would have it, I caught a terrible infection (note: not an STD!) that put me in the hospital just 2 days before that move. By the time I recovered and got back to class, he was gone. I ended up finding his email through the aforementioned facebook page, and we exchanged a few notes, mostly telling him of my health issues, but have lost touch since then.

So I guess what I'm asking for here are any ideas for an approach other than "hey, remember me? let's have sex!" It's not customary for me to be so forward, not even with the opposite sex, and I know I could be more aggressive since I'm confident he'd accept my offer, but I think because we're talking about my first time with a guy I'm very hesitant.

If you've made it this far, I appreciate you reading this and look forward to any tips you might have! Thanks!
 
i would suggest finding a new guy
or just being straight if that's what you are
 
I think contacting him again is fine... and why not "hey remember me?" see if he wants to hang out and then see where things lead... you like him... I say go for it... if he responds to the email you have a chance if not then it is time to move on. Keep us posted...
 
or just being straight if that's what you are

I agree with this.

Don't mess with any guy's head. If you're straight; be straight. I had an experience like that playing guinea pig to a bi-curious boy once and it tore me apart inside when he decided he wanted to stay straight. It's just messed up. If you want to experiment with a guy, just go to a gay bar or something and get fucked in the bathroom. Don't do it with someone you've established an acquaintance with.
 
"Hey remember me? Hope you're doing well. It's been a while. Let's do lunch and catch up. When are you available?" Then find out his hobbies/interests...for you to spend more time with him in the future.
 
Happy hour. Just mention any place you know close to your new place with one and embellish the hell out of it. You don't even have to mention your new place, at least not until you get there, then comment it with a "I just found out about this place 'cause I just moved into a new apartment down the street". Then ask him if he'd like to see it. Once you've had a drink or two in you, or if you don't need them to muster the courage to say so, just tell him you think he's cute. Make sure you make it a "just a drink and sex-thing" though... ordering food is crossing the line into "date" territory.
 
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